Domino Effect
by JanJiz
Summary: New Moon AU. What if Jasper bit Bella at her 18th Birthday party? And what dark secret has Jasper been keeping from the rest of the family? He tells all as his relationship with Bella grows. Canon. **NOT a Jasper/Bella love fic**
1. It Had To Be Done

**So I got this idea after I read a Twilighted thread asking for a Jasper/Bella fatherly bond fic. If you want the link to the thread just let me know.**

**Everything in Twilight still happened and this is Carlisle's POV mid-chapter 1, **_**New Moon**_**.**

**I don't own anything. I just like playing with Stephenie's less developed Twilight characters!**

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"Alice, is this all really necessary?" I asked.

"Of course it is, Carlisle! It's her 18th birthday! She only gets to _live_ through it once you know." Alice sang as she drapped the last of the hundreds of pink streamers on the chandelier.

Esme appear next to me and wrapped her arm around my waist.

"Oh Carlisle, let her have her fun. You know it's useless to try and fend her off anyways."

I turned to kiss my loving wife on the forehead and smiled.

"Yes, I guess your right. Alice is a force of nature that can't be fought." I laughed. "Poor Bella, she's going to be Alice's new Barbie isn't she?" I joked.

Esme stifled a laugh.

"I'll make sure she doesn't go too far with that." She smiled.

Alice jumped off the chair she was standing on and rushed over in front of us.

"Aww Mom! Come on, Bella will love those makeovers! Please don't cancel my credit cards! PLEASE!" Alice begged with her infamous pout in place.

"I will if I have to. Just don't go overboard. I don't want you to overwhelm her. This party is going to do enough of that already."

Alice sighed in relief and went back to finishing up her last minute decorating.

My wife knew exactly how to handle our children. She truly was a mother to them, in ever sense of the word.

Esme is thrilled to have a new daughter to look after now that Bella is part of our family.

I couldn't be happier.

In such a short time, Bella has become a daughter and so much more to me.

She makes my son the happiest I've ever seen him.

He truly is a changed man.

Before Bella, Edward was always on the sidelines in his own little world watching others lives play out.

He just lived through his existence, never really _living_ it to the fullest.

His life was empty and emotionless before her.

He never even showed anyone much affection.

But now that he has found his other half, he has someone to live for, someone to love, to cherish.

He's _alive_ and so full of joy.

I will never forget the joy on my dear Esme's face the day Edward returned from his first date with Bella in his meadow.

That was the day Edward Cullen was born again.

_His face was a permanent smile as he walked through the door._

_Esme could tell that everything went well, but she asked him how things went anyways._

_His voice was thick with affection and his eyes shimmered in hope. His words were clear and to the point._

"_I'm in love."_

"_Oh Edward! I'm so happy for you. I have waited for this day for 80 years. Oh! My son is in love!" Esme sang happily._

_Edward crossed the room and took Esme in his arms to embrace her in a hug._

_Esme gasped in surprise and clutched him to her frame._

_Esme cried in happiness._

_She laughed and smiled, and cried some more._

_Never had Edward been so forward to show her this kind of affection._

_Sure they had hugged before, but Esme was the one to always initiate them. _

Ever since that day he's been much more open, and definitely more affectionate with all of us, especially towards Bella.

Bella changed him.

I am so thankful to her. She single-handedly brought my son out of his shell.

The loving and caring man my son is today is all thanks to my clumsy, blushing, beautiful human daughter.

We are forever grateful.

I could now hear the rattling and roar of Bella's old truck a few miles out.

"Five minutes! Everyone get your butts down here!" Alice called out.

Jasper, Rosalie, and Emmett breezed into the room.

Emmett had their gift in his hands.

He walked over to set the empty car radio box wrapped in silver paper down with the rest.

The first sounds I could hear around the bend were Bella's angered voice.

"Well, maybe Alice will give me what I want."

I looked over to Alice to find some explanation of what she meant.

Alice shook her head and sighed.

"This isn't going to be your last birthday, Bella." Edward said sternly.

Oh, well that explains it.

The only thing those two ever argued about was about Bella becoming one of us.

I heard the truck pull up the drive and come to a screeching halt.

"That's not fair!"

I sighed.

I wish my son would see reason.

I normally wouldn't condone a changing unless it is absolutely necessary, but for my son's sake, I believe he should reconsider.

I don't even want to begin to think of what he will do once she grows old, and passes into the next life.

It would destroy him.

"This is a party, try to be a good sport."

"Sure." Bella mumbled.

I heard a car door close and then Bella spoke.

"I have a question."

Esme and I stood up and took our places just a few feet from the door to greet her.

"If I develop this film," She started. "Will you show up in the picture?"

I tried to hold back my laugh, but that was a lost cause.

Even Esme had her hand up to her mouth to stop the laugh from escaping.

Ridiculous myths.

Honestly, who came up with all those humorous legends?

We composed ourselves just as they reached the door.

"Happy birthday, Bella!" We all cheered.

The poor girl blushed a few shades of red.

She really didn't like the attention.

Her eyes widened as she took in the room that was covered in pink.

Her face was of pure horror.

Edward tried to comfort her, which only slightly worked.

Esme, being the loving mother figure that she is, hugged Bella and kissed her forehead.

I walked up beside her and held her by the shoulders.

I leaned in to whisper in her ear and comfort her.

"Sorry about this, Bella. We couldn't rein Alice in."

She greeted the rest of the family and then Alice declared it time to open presents.

Esme and I sat on our couch as we watched a very confused Bella open her first gift.

Esme leaned closer towards me and brushed her lips to my ear.

"Do you think she'll like our gift?" she whispered.

I took her hand and kissed it gently.

"I'm sure she'll love it." I whispered back.

She smiled and turned her attention back to our new daughter.

"Open mine and Edward's next." Alice said as she held out the small silver wrapped gift.

Bella turned and glared at Edward. "You promised…"

"Just in time!" Emmett boomed as he walked through the door.

He and Jasper came closer to see what Edward had gotten Bella.

Edward pushed aside a lock of Bella's hair from her face.

"I didn't spend a dime." He whispered to her.

Bella's eyes slightly glazed over and she sighed in defeat. "Give it to me."

Emmett chuckled when Bella snatched the gift from Alice's hands.

She rolled her eyes and started to fumble with the wrapping paper of the gift.

"Shoot." She mumbled.

She held her finger in front of her face, a single drop of blood dripped from her paper cut.

And then it all happened so fast.

"No!" Edward roared.

But it was too late.

Jasper snapped at Bella's hand.

Edward jumped up and threw Bella back out of Jasper's reach.

He threw himself at Jasper as he was about to lunge at Bella again and their bodies collided in midair.

The sound of shattering glass broke me out of my shocked state.

Bella was lying on the ground surrounded by glass from the table holding her gifts and cake.

Her eyes were widened in shock and horror.

I rushed to her side.

Bella was gripping on to her hand tightly.

I lifted her up onto the couch to get her away from all the glass.

Snarls and growls continued to echo throughout the room.

I turned to look at Edward still pinning Jasper down.

Jasper was thrashing wildly trying to get away and towards Bella.

Emmett was now holding him down too.

This is not going to end well.

I needed to get everyone out of the room.

"Edward, Emmett, Rose, get Jasper outside."

The three struggled to get him outside.

I could hear Edward's screams and curses as he continued to growl at Jasper out in the forest.

"Oh God the blood…" Esme whispered as she threw her hands up to cover her nose.

"You should go too Esme." I said in a hushed voice.

"I'm so sorry, Bella." She cried and left to aid the others outside with Jasper.

Alice brought me a towel to clean Bella up.

I turned my attention back to the fragile girl in my arms.

Her breathing was irregular, her pulse was through the roof.

Her heart was pounding in her chest and I was afraid she would go in to cardiac arrest.

Bella groaned and flinched as I tried to grab her hand.

Her eyes were squeezed shut and she was biting her lip so hard that it was beginning to draw blood.

Her body began to twitch.

I was worried that she was going into shock.

"Bella? Bella, can you hear me?" I brushed my hand over her cheek and she flinched at my touch. I quickly removed my hand.

She nodded and groaned in pain.

"Bella let me look at your hand so I can clean it."

She hesitantly let go of her hand and I gasped in horror.

Oh God.

Right on the palm of her hand was a bite.

Jasper had bit her.

The wound was oozing with venom and the cuts were starting to scab over quickly.

"Oh no…" Alice cried. "We have to do something Carlisle."

Bella immediately clutched at her hand again and held it to her chest.

She should be screaming for dear life by now.

The venom was getting deathly close to taking her under.

Her body thrashed wildly but still she did not scream.

Edward, as well as everyone else but Alice and I, were now miles out with Jasper.

Alice is still not strong enough to suck the venom out.

That would only leave me.

I had never drank from a human, I wasn't so sure if I could handle it.

When I had changed the rest of my family, I had only bitten them, never drank.

Would I be able to taste human blood for the first time in over 300 years and be able to control myself?

How would it affect my job at the hospital?

"You can do it, Carlisle." Alice affirmed. "You need to do it now or it will be too late."

I nodded and took Bella's hand in mine.

She let out a whimper and a few other groans.

She desperately tried to pull her hand free from mine.

"No…" Bella cried, it was barely a whisper.

She thrashed violently again, trying to stifle a scream.

"I'm sorry for all of this Bella." I pleaded.

I brought her hand to my lips.

"Carlisle wait!"

I froze and turned to Alice.

"Listen!"

"Carlisle…" Bella's voice was rasp and cracked. I turned to look at her again.

Her eyes were barely open and where shedding tears over her reddened cheeks.

"Please…" she cried. "Don't…"

"Bella, I –"

"Please…" she begged again.

She took my hand in hers and squeezed as hard as her strength allowed.

She was gasping for air now.

Her heartbeat was alarmingly fast, it sounded almost like a humming bird.

"Ugh…Please, don't…just…don't." she continued to beg. She clutched at her arm and chest.

Her eyes bore into mine, begging me to leave the venom in her.

She wanted this.

I wanted this for her.

Everyone except Edward and Rosalie wanted this for her.

Would he hate me if I let it happen?

I took her other hand in mine and gripped it firmly.

It was beyond his decision anymore.

She was my daughter now, and hell if I would take another child away from Esme.

I had to make the choice for our family.

"As you wish, Bella."

She closed her eyes and a small half smile formed on her lips.

She was ready.

I quickly bit her wrists, both of her ankles, and lastly at her neck and pushed out as much venom as I possibly could to speed up the transformation.

As my lips left her neck, Bella's eyes snapped open and she gasped loudly.

Her back arched and she let out an ear piercing shriek.

I held her close to my chest trying to comfort her as much as I could.

_I'm sorry, Edward. _

"NO!" he roared in the distance.

I could hear his footfalls growing closer now.

_It had to be done._

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**Sooooo, What'd you guys think?! =D**

**Next will be Edward's POV, and everyone's reactions to Carlisle's decision.**

**Sneak Peak of next chapter if you review!**

**-Jan**

**(FYI, This fic will not be updated as frequent as my **_**Another Chance**_** sequel. **_**Amor Fati**_** is my main focus right now. As soon as I'm done with that one all my attention will be put into this one and another fic that I am in the works of starting as well.)**

*****I have new blogs up with a bunch of stuff for both of those fics now too. Links are up on my profile, check them out!*****


	2. She's Mine

**Wow! 19 reviews for my first chapter! That's more than I've ever gotten for just one chapter before. **

**You guys are amazing!**

**Here's the next chapter as promised:**

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_**Edward's POV**_

Time slowed as the potent smell of my Bella's blood hit my nose. I immediately stopped breathing. The tiny drop of blood had started to run down her finger. I shut my eyes and desperately tried to calm the monster inside me.

It would be so easy for me to reach out and taste her again. At least just a one lick, that's all. Or I could just bite into her hand and take what is rightfully mine. She sang to me, her blood is _mine_.

No, I won't. I can't drink from her, I _won't_ drink from her.

_I love her._ She's Bella. _My Bella. _Control yourself.

Lost in my own battle of control for a split second, I hadn't heard his thoughts and realized his intentions fast enough. When I opened my eyes Jasper had already thrown himself at her. He was already too close for comfort.

"NO!" I roared.

I threw myself at them and pushed Bella to the side, out of his grasp.

My hands caught his body mid-air as he lunged out towards her again. With as much force as I could, I held him back. Jasper grabbed my arm and tried to loosen my grip. He growled and tore at my shirt trying to break free.

_Delicious. I want her! She's mine!_

I growled and jumped in the air with him still in my grip. I needed to get him as far away from Bella as I could. We were both flying backwards in the air when I heard glass shatter. A second later, we were crashing down on top of my piano. The wood crumbled beneath us. Jasper punched me in the jaw and dislocated it.

A fierce growl erupted from him and I returned the gesture with an equal menacing one of my own. He desperately tried to roll me off of him. I easily dodged his attempts to where he wouldn't gain enough control and loosen my grip on him.

His thoughts were only of Bella's blood. If it were any other battle than his bloodlust for her, he would have easily taken me down with all the experience he has over me.

Emmett came down beside me and held onto his arms helping me lift him up and hold him back at the same time. Jasper put up quite a fight but between the two of us he didn't have a chance in hell to get away.

"Edward, Emmett, Rose, get Jasper outside." Carlisle said calmly.

How he could be so calm in a moment like this I had no clue.

Rosalie joined us across the room and we dragged Jasper outside of the house. The fresh air had helped him, but hardly. He was still thrashing trying to go back towards the house.

"Let's get him away into the woods, the farther the better." Emmett suggested.

We made it about four miles out. We were far enough away now that we couldn't smell Bella's blood or hear her heartbeat anymore.

Rosalie tried to calm Jasper down, but I wouldn't let her. I immediately threw Jasper in to a tree and held his neck in a death grip.

"You idiot! What the hell were you thinking? I know you don't have as much control but god damn it Jasper, I'll fucking kill you before you hurt her!"

With my other hand I punched him in his stomach over and over again. He didn't even try to fight back.

_I deserve this. God I can't believe I…_

"Damn right you deserve it!"

I growled and punched him in the face. I heard his nose crack and he fell back on to the trunk of the tree. His hand instinctively went to his face and he closed his eyes when my fist went back into the air aimed right at his jaw.

Before I could make contact, a strong hand held my fist just and inch away from Jasper's face.

"Edward, you will not hit your brother. Stop this, now. You need to calm yourself. Both of you." Esme loosened her grip on my fist and I hesitantly stood up and backed away.

I screamed at the top of my lungs and let out all my frustration on a large tree beside me. I punched and kicked at it. I tried my best to focus my anger at the tree instead of Jasper. I would probably regret it late if I killed him… I definitely wouldn't want to hurt Alice like that.

I stopped my abuse on the tree when I heard choked sobs coming from behind me. I turned to see Jasper on the ground holding his knees to his chest as he rocked back and forth. His tearless sobs were my undoing.

Who am I kidding?

We're _vampires_. This is to be expected. It isn't his fault for wanting something that is natural for us. But still, it was _my_ Bella who he wanted to drink from. It was foolish to think any of us would be able to control ourselves in this type of situation. With an accident prone Bella, something like this was bound to happen sooner or later.

And who's to say that if Jasper hadn't ran for her first, that I wouldn't have done the same? This incident just confirmed my biggest fears. Bella would never be safe with any of us in her life.

_God he's going to kill me. What the hell have I done? I hope it's not too late._

I rushed over to him and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt.

"What the hell are you talking about? Too late for what?" I growled.

Another sob over took his body. He winced and thought back to just minutes before when he attacked Bella.

He ran to her as she lifted her hand to her face. The rest of us blurred from his sight and he only saw the red drop of blood fall from the wound of her finger tip. He went for her hand and felt the blood that was dripping on his lips as he bit down. Then almost immediately the hand was gone and I was throwing him backwards.

My eyes widened in shock.

He bit her?!

"NO!" I growled. It echoed throughout the forest and I felt my chest tighten as the realization hit me at full force.

I couldn't hold back all the rage that built up inside me. I hoped, for Jasper sake, that he would run before I had the chance to get my hands on him later. But right now, I had to get to Bella first.

I took off not looking back. My feet pounded into the ground and I kicked up dirt with every step. I crashed through trees as if they were paper thin. I would let nothing get in my way of going back to Bella. In seconds I could see the outline of our house. Bella's heartbeat was erratic and it only made me push myself harder to get there.

"Bella?!" I yelled as I bolted through the back door of the house.

The door cracked and fell off its hinges.

"Bella!" I threw myself at Carlisle and took Bella from his arms.

_I'm sorry, son._

I ignored him and set her down on the opposite couch. I crouched down beside her and pulled the hair out of her tear stained face. She was biting her lip and had her eyes closed. Her hands were clenched shut and her heart threatened to tear from her chest.

"I'm so sorry Bella. This is all my fault."

I should have never brought her here. I'm such an idiot. I should have stayed away from her.

When this is all over, I'll tell Carlisle that we must leave Forks. We can't stay in Bella's life anymore. It's too dangerous for her to be part of this world.

"I'll make it go away, Bella. You'll be ok." I whispered. I moved to take Bella's hands in mine.

"Edward…" Alice said softly.

"No! Stay out of this Alice. She will _not_ become one of us." I growled.

"It's too late." She continued.

It wasn't too late. It couldn't be. Jasper couldn't have left much venom in his bite, there's still a chance.

"Leave!" I growled.

_Look at her wrists, Edward._

I lifted my loves hand and saw double bite marks on it. I could smell Jasper and Carlisle's venom at the wound. Her other hand was bitten as was her neck. I immediately spun around and crouched low ready to pounce.

"_You!_ What have you done?!" I seethed.

_I'm sorry Edward but –_

"Why? Why didn't you just suck out the venom? You could have called for me if you didn't have the strength to do it yourself! You didn't have to bite her! This wasn't how it was supposed to be!"

_It had to be done, son._

I growled at my creator.

How dare he call me son after what he's done to my Bella!

"Who the hell do you think you are to take away her humanity? I can't believe you would do this, Carlisle. It goes against everything you believe in. How could you betray me like _this_?"

Carlisle winced and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Because I will not let you break this family apart! She is our family now too, Edward. Like it or not, this had to be done. Jasper had already bitten her anyways and–"

I didn't let him finish.

I lunged out towards him.

I had barely moved when I came crashing down to the floor. Alice was over me, holding me down. She growled and narrowed her eyes at me.

"You know you'll regret it for the rest of your existence if you hurt him. Don't you dare even _think_ about trying that again." She demanded.

I instantly felt ashamed. I let my head fall back and hit the wooden floor with more force than necessary. My rage was directed at the wrong person. Carlisle only did what he thought was best. But it was my fault, everything about this was.

I should have never guilt tripped her into coming to this party. I should have never let her get this close to my family. I should have never let myself get this close to her. I should have never let myself get too attached. I should have never come back to Forks and left Denali.

She would be safe if I hadn't been in her life. She wouldn't be in agonizing pain right now if it weren't for me. This was all because of me. This was all because of my choice to stay and my weakness for her. How selfish I have been! I don't even deserve to live. How could I have let this happen to her?

I sharp pain on my cheek brought me back to reality.

"That was for freaking out." I opened my eyes to see Alice still on top of me. Her fist pulled back and hit me square in the jaw. I loud crack echoed in my ears and my skinned burned where she had punched me. "And that was for thinking this was all your fault."

She stood up. "It wasn't your fault. This was meant to happen. You know very well that I had seen it since the first day we met her." She huffed and then walked over to place a pillow beneath Bella's head.

At lightning speed I was back at Bella's side. She was unconscious now. Her body was covered with a thick later of sweat and she tossed and turned in her sleeping state. I took her hands in mine and rested my forehead on her shoulder.

"But this is my fault!" I sobbed. "She wouldn't be going through all of this if I would have stayed away! I've condemned her. I've damned her soul. She's going to hate me for this."

I felt a hand at my shoulder. I wanted to pull away but couldn't find the strength to do so. I didn't want to be comforted. I didn't deserve it. I should be banished to the deepest pit in hell. Or is this already my hell? I lifted my head to look upon my Angel's face, contorted in pain. Yes, this was hell.

The grip on my shoulder tightened.

"Edward, she's not going to hate you." Carlisle's soothing voice said from above me. "It's what she wanted all along. If anything she would be grateful."

"Grateful?" I growled and shrugged off his hand from my shoulder. "She doesn't know what she wants, Carlisle. She doesn't know this life like we do. When she realizes that this life is not what she thought it would be, she will hate me for bringing her into my world. That's even if she remembers me!" I choked out a sob at the mere thought.

I caressed my loves face and she instinctively turned into my hand. A small sigh of relief escaped her lungs.

I lifted her slightly so I could sit beneath her. I let my cool skin touch as much of her heated skin as I could manage. She shifted and molded herself to my body. I almost smiled at the thought of her fitting perfectly in my arms, like she was made for only me.

We've gone through so much already. If she were to forget me after her change I don't know what I would do with myself. Having her hate me seemed like a much better option than the thought of her never remembering me, _remembering our love._

Bella stiffened and whimpered in my arms. The sound was like a knife cutting deep into my heart. With every stutter of her heart, a tear would rip through mine. I clenched my teeth and held my eyes tightly closed. I willed myself to be strong for her. It took everything I had to hold back another round of sobs.

I vaguely noticed Carlisle and Alice leave the room to give us space. Time meant nothing to me anymore. I didn't know if I sat here for ten hours or ten seconds. My only measurement of time was the sound of Bella's heartbeat that gradually beat faster as time went by.

"Will Bella's transformation go well?" I heard Carlisle whisper from somewhere in the house.

"I don't know." Alice replied in the same hushed tone.

"What do you mean?" _Alice always knows these things._

"I mean that I honestly don't know. I can't see her future. It's blurry. But that's not all…" she trailed off.

I reached out to Alice's mind. She was trying to view Bella's future but it was murky. It was like a freshly painted watercolor portrait being washed off a canvas with water. I had never seen a vision of hers like that. What was more disturbing was when she looked for the rest of the family's future.

"Come, Edward can hear us anyways so we might as well talk in front of him." Alice said.

Carlisle and Alice appeared in the room a second later.

"What's wrong with your visions, Alice?" I asked.

"As for Bella's future, I have no idea. As for ours." She turned to Carlisle. "When I look for any of our futures, it's just completely black."

"What does that mean?" he asked her.

"Well this has only happened to me once before." Her mind thought back to a time before she found us fifty years ago. Jasper and her were hunting somewhere in Ohio when they crossed paths with some man in the woods. "Before Jasper and I came to find you, while we were hunting one day, my visions had gone black when I looked into our futures. All of a sudden out of no where, a man came out of hiding in the woods to confront us. He smelled horrible, like wet and must. He told us to get off his land or he would kill us. Of course us being vampires, we didn't take his threat seriously. When we made no move to leave, the man growled and lunged out towards me. Jasper acted quickly and tore him apart before he could move an inch."

"How does that have anything to do with us now?" I asked.

"Edward, that man was a werewolf." She whispered.

"The treaty…" Carlisle said under his breath.

"Absurd! The wolves have died out. They can't be back." I said a bit too loudly. Bella's body began to shudder. My grip tightened and I lifted her to kiss her forehead. Her fists clenched and she bit her lip.

"Carlisle, it's not possible. They couldn't have possibly survived this long…" I whispered.

"We don't know much about wolves, Edward. What if they are immortal like us? When we encountered them all those years ago, you said yourself that they were very complex creatures and were made to kill us. And now I've broken the treaty and they will come for us."

He was right. When we met up with the two wolves and the Quileute Elder council, I had tried to dig up as much information from their minds as possible. There minds worked quite like a vampire's would. They could process things much faster than humans and were able to think of many things at once. I could vaguely remember one of them thinking about how changing into wolf form regularly changed their aging process.

"You're right. They must still be alive. That's the only explanation for the changes in her visions. We need to do something before they find out about Bella." I admitted.

Alice was pacing now. Her thoughts were jumbled up as she tried desperately to find us a loop hole in the treaty.

"The treaty was well written, Alice. There are no loop holes. We aren't allowed to bite, let alone change a human." I said pained.

"I know! But I have to figure something out. Are we supposed to just sit and wait for them to come knocking on our door?"

Just then the front door opened and Emmett, Rosalie and Esme walked in. I noticed Jasper wasn't with them.

"We need to tell you guys som– " Alice started.

"We heard everything." Rosalie confirmed.

"I say we just kill the wolves and get it over with. There's 7 of us, well 8 if you include Bella." I growled at Emmett. He just rolled his eyes and continued to talk as if nothing happened. "and there's what? Like 2 or 3 of them. We could take them, easy."

"We're not going to kill them, Emmett." Carlisle argued. "They've done nothing wrong. They don't deserve to die for our disloyalty." _For _my_ disloyalty. I had completely forgotten about the treaty. I was so taken back by her begging that I didn't even think about it twice._

"She _begged_?" I gasped.

Carlisle sighed and nodded.

He replayed what had happened when he went to suck the venom from her hand. How she tried to stifle her screams and begged him to leave the venom in her. She smiled when he gave in. She _smiled_.

"Oh god, Bella. _Why?_" I cried and lowered my head and placed it over hers. I kissed the top of her head. "Have you no self-preservation? You didn't have to do this…"

"Edward…"

I lifted my head and cupped my loves cheek. My chest tightened and my heart ached at the sound of her voice. It was cracked and pained.

"I…want…this." She grunted.

"I know…" I whispered to her. "I know." I cried. "But this isn't how it's supposed to be. I should have never – "

A scream escaped her lips and I cringed. Her body thrashed beneath my hands and it took everything I had not to crush her to my chest. I would give anything to take the pain away from her. I would gladly take her place and suffer the pain of a hundred transformations in exchange for her pain if I could.

When her screaming subsided she bit her lip again. Her hand shook violently when she lifted it to my cheek.

"Don't…blame…yourself." She whimpered and gasped for air. "I love you."

I bent over to kiss her lips.

"I love you too, with all of my being. Never forget that." I pleaded.

She tried to smile but it came out more of a grimace.

The family was silent, allowing us a moment.

After a few more thrashes and groans, she fell back into unconsciousness.

"We have to do something about the wolves. I can't lose, Bella. Not now…not after everything…" I trailed off.

Carlisle nodded.

"What if we run?" Rosalie suggested.

"I've already thought of that. My vision still comes up black. If we run, they'll find us." Alice said.

"We could talk to them, explain what happened. Maybe they'll forgive us." Esme said hopefully.

"Unfortunately, even I doubt that would be an option." Carlisle started. "They specifically told us that they would have no leniency if we were to slip up and harm someone. They warned us that they wouldn't give it a second thought. They would attack us."

"I still say we should just take them out." Emmett grinned.

Rosalie slapped the back of his neck and told him to shut up and be serious.

"Well I don't see anyone else coming up with any other good ideas!" He huffed.

I growled and held Bella impossibly closer to me as Jasper's familiar scent came into the room.

"I have an idea."

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**-Jan**


	3. It's For the Best

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"I have an idea."

I growled again and Bella stirred. She had a death grip on my shirt. Jasper clutched at his stomach and lost balance as Bella's pain reached him. Esme stood up and walked toward us, successfully blocking my sight of Jasper.

"Edward let me take her up stairs to your room so she will be more comfortable."

I pulled Bella closer to me and away from Esme's open arms. "She's fine here. I don't want to leave her side."

_You will all need to discuss a few things. Your growling is only going to upset her._

I sighed and kissed Bella's forehead. "I'll be up in a few minutes, love. Esme will stay with you." I whispered in her ear. I stood up and placed her in Esme's arms. _She's be fine, Edward. I'll take care of her. You could watch her through my thoughts if you like. _I nodded and she smiled warmly at me. She walked up the stairs at human pace.

"So Jasper, what _is _your idea?" Rosalie asked.

Jasper took in my emotions and cautiously walked into the living room.

"I think my empathy could help us." He paused to relax himself. Bella's transformation was taking a toll on him. I half smirked. At least he's suffering right along with her for doing this to her. He shook his head in disapproval of my emotions. _I'm trying to help her as much as I can Edward. Your spite isn't helping at all. _

"I know you can calm them and all, but do you _really_ think that will work? You probably won't be able to completely convince them not to kill us for breaking the treaty…" Emmett doubted.

Jasper took a deep breath and then met my eyes. "Well first off, we have to fake her death…" I narrowed my eyes at him and tried to dig through his thoughts. He was guarding them fairly well. "I think we could fool the wolves into believing that Bella simply died in a freak accident and if everyone acts convincing enough, we can fool them to believe that we had nothing to do with her death."

"Ok, but what does that have to do with your gift?" Rosalie asked.

Before Jasper could answer, a flicker of visions passed through Alice's mind.

_Jasper driving the Porsche with an unconscious Bella in the passenger's seat. Bella's truck in flames in the woods. Alice showing up on Charlie's doorstep to help with funeral arrangements. Students walking up to Alice and I in school to say "I'm sorry for your loss." Charlie in tears, spread over Bella's bed. Me in my room pacing around with a phone in my hand. Jasper in Denali taking Bella on her first hunt. Me sitting at my piano with my head in my hands and my cell phone sitting on top of the piano. . Jasper and Bella sitting in a study reading together. A golden eyed Bella kissing me, pulling away to say "I've missed you so much."_

"It'll work." Alice beamed.

"No! Absolutely not." I yelled. "Not going to happen."

"Edward, it's the only way! Everything else has us all dying in the end." She argued.

"No. And that's final."

"Too bad. We're doing it anyways." She said poking her tongue out at me.

"Only if I'm the one that goes." I countered.

"But it won't work that way!" She yelled.

"Then we find another way, Alice. She is not going to be anywhere near _him_." I glared at my _brother_ who was sitting in a corner on the opposite side of the room. He winced and then glanced in my direction.

"I won't hurt her." He whispered. I laughed sarcastically.

"Yeah, right. You've done enough damage, Jasper. _Stay away from her_."

He held his hands up in surrender.

"He's going!" Alice growled.

"Damn it, Alice let it go. Why would you want your husband to leave you anyways? And how could you trust someone who almost _killed_ your best friend?" I yelled.

Her face went blank and she turned away from me. She took a small, shaky breath and whispered, "The same way I trust my brother every day not to kill her." Jasper rushed to her side and took her in his arms as she cried.

I opened my mouth to retort, but closed when no sound came out. I made my sister cry. All she is trying to do is help her best friend, my love, my Bella, and I made her cry. I'm a monster.

"Alice, I – "

"I know its ok. Don't worry about it." She sniffled. Jasper sat on the couch opposite of me and sat Alice on his lap. I buried my head in my hands. What the hell is wrong with me? I'm arguing with my family, attacking them, growling…This isn't me. But I need to protect Bella. I can't let her get hurt anymore than she already is.

But how can I stay away from her? I wouldn't be able to even see her…

"Edward…" Alice whispered. "We all love her too." _Even Jasper, you know that. Let us help protect her. It's the only way, Edward._

"Will you three care to let us in on what Jasper's idea is?" Carlisle asked calmly. Alice and Jasper both looked at me for approval. I nodded stiffly. Jasper cleared his throat and turned to face Carlisle.

"I propose that I take Bella to Denali as soon as possible. After her death is faked, the wolves will be coming to question the family. When they see that I won't be there of course they will get suspicious. But since the wolves know about my gift, we could use that as a viable excuse for me to be gone. You could simply say that with all the grief the town was going through, because of her sudden death, I just up and ran off."

"Hmm…" _That sounds like a good plan. But will Edward allow it?_Carlisle turned to meet my gaze."If this happens we would have to stay behind for at least a few months just in case the wolves watch over us." _I'm sorry…_ "Would you be able to handle that?"

My hand instinctively came up to pinch the bridge of my nose.

"I don't know. It seems to be the only way, but how could I just leave her side, Carlisle? She's my life. And now she's in the worse pain she will ever be in and I'm just supposed to let Jasper take her away from me?" I groaned and placed my head in my hands. "If I let this happen, I won't even be there for her when she wakes up! She'll hate me even more."

I flinched when I felt a hand at my back. "At least you will know she's safe. And it would keep the rest of us safe as well." Carlisle pointed out while rubbing soothing circles on my back. "You could watch her from Alice's visions. I know it won't be the same but we have to do everything we can." _I'm so sorry for putting you through all this, son. In the end, everything will work out. You'll see._

I stood up and walked towards the stairs. "At least give me tonight alone with her."

* * *

_**Carlisle's POV**_

Changing Bella has been a curse as well as a blessing.

I have given my son a gift that he was too selfless to give himself. He deserves his happiness with the one he loves, for eternity. And I did what he could not.

Of course the consequences of my actions have now led to our problem with the wolves. The thought had not crossed my mind at all as I bit down on Bella's skin. Thinking back on it now, I don't know if my decision would have been different.

As much as it pained me to have my first son lash out at me, I know that one day he will look back on it and be grateful for Bella's change.

Edward had gone up to his room to be with Bella. I could hear him place kisses on her forehead and whispering in her ear that everything would be ok. I only hoped that things would.

Esme came down the stairs moments later and we all sat around the living room to discuss our next step of action.

"So how are we faking Bella's death?" Emmett asked.

"I had a vision of Bella's car in flames in the woods off the interstate, about five miles from here. Charlie already thinks Bella will be staying over tonight, so we could stage the car accident with her truck tomorrow night."

I nodded in agreement. "I can get a body from the morgue that we can use in place of Bella's body. And I will make sure to be the only one to examine the body after it is pulled out."

"Jasper should leave with her tomorrow morning just in case." Alice continued. I could hear Edward's muffled growl from upstairs. "We need as much time as possible to let Bella's scent fade away from us so that the wolves don't get any more suspicious than they already will be."

We all separated to get our things ready to prepare for Bella's fake death. I went to the hospital in search of a body that fit Bella's body type and features. There was a body to be shipped off in a few days for research at the University of Washington that would be perfect. I quickly called the university and told them the paperwork was not done correctly and the body was supposed to be given to another university. I made sure that all the paperwork for her body was destroyed. When I had finished my shift, I went to the morgue to make sure the body was in a body bag and ready for when I came back for it.

When I got back home everyone else was already done with their parts. Emmett and Rosalie had messed with the truck's brakes and gas line to make it look like her brakes blew out while Bella was driving and then her gas tank blew up on impact.

Alice and Jasper had gone to Port Angeles to buy Bella new clothing that would fit her vampire body once she woke up.

Esme had called the Denali's to let them know that Jasper and Bella would be on their way up the next day. Carmen offered to clean and have one of our old homes in Denali ready for them to stay at when they arrived.

Edward was still with Bella in his room. He had not left her side. The time for her departure was getting closer and I knew he would be a nervous wreck right now.

I knocked on his door. When he didn't say anything I opened the door to make sure things were ok.

"We're fine." Edward whispered. Bella was in Edward's lap and he was stroking her face and arms to cool her heated skin. I sat next them on his couch.

_Alice and Jasper are packing everything into the car. They should be heading out within the next hour…_

He winced but nodded. Bella seemed to be getting a little more restless but still she was holding in her screams. I caressed her cheek and pulled away some of the hair that was stuck to her face. I smiled. My daughter was so brave and strong. I've walked this earth more than three centuries and never have I encountered someone to keep their screams at bay during their transformation.

"Yes, she's very strong, much stronger than I ever gave her credit for. From Jasper's thoughts, she's feeling just as much as any other transformation, along with a hell of a lot of determination and love. She's holding back as much as she can to not cause the family pain."

_To not cause you pain_ I added. He nodded and kissed Bella's forehead.

As much as a monster I think I might have been to have changed Bella against his will, I can't help but still be glad I did. My heart swells with pride and joy and especially love, when I see her in Edward's arms. She makes him happy and he deserves this.

When I created Rosalie, I changed her with the hope that Edward would find his mate in her. I felt so ashamed of myself after Edward found out my intentions about her. I had promised myself after that day I would not interfere with his life in that way again. But I had to break that promise. Even if this change _was_ for Edward's happiness, my families' happiness was at stake as well.

Edward's lip twitched into a half decent smirk. "Yes you did break that promise didn't you?" he whispered.

I ignored the question, he already knew the answer. We sat in silence for a few minutes before I had the nerve to even ask him.

"If I had sucked the venom out what would you have done?" I whispered. He looked away from me.

"I was going to tell you that we were to move away. We would leave Bella here so she could live out her humanity with out our interface. She deserved to live her life without the constant threat of vampires. She would have found someone else, a human, to love and grow old with. She would have forgotten me, eventually. Maybe one day she would have had children…" He lowered his gaze to Bella. "But that's not gong to happen now. I've taken that all away from her."

"But what about you? If we would have left, you would have been broken, Edward. Would you really be able to live with out her?"

"I would have done it for her. I only want what's best for her. She would have had a long happy _life_."

_And when she would die? She would have had to die one day. What then?_

"I would have followed her." He whispered, almost too low for me to hear.

I stood up and paced the room. He would have done that to us? To poor Esme… She had already lost one son. She wouldn't be able to bear loosing another and a daughter as well.

"I wouldn't be able to exist in a world without her, Carlisle." He said pained.

I turned to glare at him. _That is exactly why I changed her!_ _You would have never done it yourself. _

I saved this family much more grief than I had originally thought. We would have lost Bella _and_ Edward if he would have decided to leave her.

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. _This is for the best Edward. It may have not been at the best time or in the right way, but this is better for all of us than leaving her human and disappearing from her life. Just as you would have been broken, she would have been just as bad. Do you really think she would have gotten over you so quickly? If her love is as strong as I believe it is, she would have never stopped loving you. She would have never forgotten._ When I looked up, Edward's head hung in shame.

I sat back down next to him and held him to me. I could feel his silence cried upon my chest so I did my best to comfort him. We didn't say another word until Alice came up to retrieve Bella.

"It's time. Everything's ready." She stood at the door and waited for Edward to say his goodbyes.

Edward's grip tightened on Bella. He pressed his forehead to hers. He kissed her eyes and cheeks followed by a kiss on her lips. I turned away then to give him privacy. I looked over at Alice. She gave me a reassuring smile. Yes, all will go well.

"I…" I quickly whipped my head around towards Bella's strained voice. "It's ok…"

Edward looked frantic. He was clinging on to her for dear life. I was almost afraid he would hold her a bit too tightly.

"I hate this. God, I don't want her to go." Edward whispered.

"I…love you." Bella whimpered. "Please."

He kissed her once more. "I love you too, Bella. Please be safe for me. You still have my heart, no matter what happens. I'll see you again as soon as I can." Bella briefly opened her eyes and half smiled at him. A single tear escaped from her eye and Edward kissed it away. He stood with her in his arms and followed Alice out to the car. After securing Bella in the passenger seat he turned to Jasper.

"Take care of her. You've already lost my trust once; don't make me doubt you again."

Jasper's face fell for a split second but then quickly composed himself. Edward narrowed his eyes at him, probably digging through his thoughts. A look of confusion passed through Edward's features. Edward nodded at Jasper and then stepped aside for him to walk over to the car.

Jasper said his goodbyes to the rest of the family and then had a private moment with Alice. Esme came to stand beside me and I took her in my arms. Emmett and Rosalie stood embraced on the front porch.

Alice walked over beside when Jasper climbed into the car. With one last nod our way, Jasper pulled out of the drive. Edward stood a few feet away from us with his fists clenched as he watched the car speed away.

We all stood there in silence for a few minutes. Edward was unmoving and stiff. He must be watching through Jasper's mind to get a final glance at Bella before he was out of hearing range. Another minute passed and he turned around to face us. He nodded in my direction and then quickly sped off inside of the house. I heard his room door close and seconds later music drifted to my ears.

I turned to my wife and she smiled at me. I kissed her forehead and just held her to me. I could only imagine what Edward must be going through right now. If I had to leave Esme for so long, I would go mad.

A few hours later, Alice gathered us to living room to give us instructions on where to be and what to do when news of Bella's accident gets out.

She had told Charlie that Bella would be driving back home tonight at six. We would be setting up the car crash at that time.

At five thirty I drove to the hospital. I snuck back into the morgue and was able to jump out the window unnoticed, with the girl's lifeless body in my arms. I felt a pang of remorse for having to do this to the girl's body but I had to do everything possible to protect my family. They would always come first. Emmett met me with my car behind the hospital and I jumped in the back seat with the body bag. Then we quickly drove back to the house to meet up with Alice.

When six came around, Alice took her place in Bella's truck with a brunette wig and shades on just in case we passed anyone on the way. Emmett and I followed her in the Mercedes.

"This is where I saw the vision from." Alice said. "Be ready."

A few seconds later she hit the gas and swerved around to hit a few trees in the forest off the road. There was a loud crash when the windshield blew out. The noise would have alerted someone's attention so we would have to work fast.

I opened the body bag and carefully took the body in my arms. I raced towards Alice and we placed the body in the driver's seat with the seatbelt on. We crushed the steering wheel and indented the skull of the body to make it seem like Bella had died on impact. Emmett rushed to the scene and drained out the gas line. When we were a good distance away, Emmett flicked a match to ignite the truck and was able to run to the car before the truck burst into flames.

"Everything will go as planned. We need to get back _now_." Alice directed.

We got back in the car and drove off.

Now we would just have to wait.

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**-Jan**


	4. Out of My Hands

**Alright guys, First and foremost thank you for all your amazing reviews! You guys make me smile and that makes me happy! =D**

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_**Carlisle's POV**_

"She's gone, Carlisle. She's…gone."

In that moment, I was glad Jasper was gone. If he were here, he'd be doubled over in pain from how much guilt I was feeling right now. That along with Edward and now Charlie's grief would really make him run away from Forks.

There was nothing that could have prepared me for this moment. It was worse than the fear of our pending fate with the wolves.

Charlie Swan stood at my door, dripping wet from the pouring rain. I couldn't tell where the rain drops started and the tear drops ended. The poor grieving man in front of me made my heart ache as if I had lost Bella as well.

In becoming Bella's new adoptive father, I've now taken her away from her biological one. I would never forgive myself for that.

The guilt built up in my throat, so much so that I had to clear it before I could speak.

"Charlie, what do you mean 'she's gone'?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady.

He shook his head and wiped the rain from his face.

Esme walked up behind me placing her hand on my shoulder.

"What's going on, Carlisle?" she asked, playing her part. She looked beyond the door and gasped. "Good heavens, Charlie. What are you doing here at this time of the night? Come inside and out of the rain before you get sick." She motioned for him to come in. He nodded stiffly before he walked into the house.

Esme guided him into the living room. She then excused herself and went to the linen closet to fetch him a towel to dry off. I turned to close the door and waited for as long as I could to gain confidence in myself. I would have to face him and deal with what I've done. I've helped my son with the grief of giving up Bella for a few months, a hard task in itself. But how can I help Charlie with his grief of losing Bella forever?

I took a deep breath and walked towards the living room.

Charlie was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. Esme offered him the towel and he made no move to retrieve it. Esme looked up to meet my eyes and shook her head sadly. She wrapped the towel around his now shivering torso and sat next to him. She rubbed his back to sooth him. After a few moments I walked over to sit at his other side.

"Charlie what's got you so upset?" I asked. I hated that I had to act as if I didn't know what was going on. Charlie didn't deserve this. I wish I could tell him the truth, that his daughter is safe and will be just fine in two days time.

He looked up to speak. "I'm sorry to have come so late, I hope I didn't wake you…" he whispered. "It's just…there's been an accident."

"An Accident?"

"My little girl…Carlisle…Bella she…she's gone. She was in a car accident just off the 101. Her brakes when out and…she didn't make it." He managed to keep a steady voice even though I could tell he was at the point of tears again.

"Oh Charlie…" Esme wrapped him in a tight hug and wept. I could only look away and burry my head in my hands. What have I done to this poor man?

Charlie's heart beat was racing. It was so fast, I was afraid for his health. Charlie was only thirty six, he didn't need this much stress on his heart.

"I'm so sorry Charlie." I said sincerely. I wish there was a way to have it both ways. But what's done is done.

"She was so young…" he whispered.

We were silent for a few minutes. None of us knew what to say next. After awhile Charlie spoke up.

"They just cleaned up the scene about an hour ago. I haven't let anyone examine her body yet. I hate to ask you, but I want you to be the one to do it, doc."

I could only nod in response.

"_Carlisle you need to leave with him as soon as we come down."_ Alice whispered from somewhere upstairs.

"_Alright, but call me as soon as you get news from Jasper."_ I answered, too low for human ears.

A moment later the sound of loud footsteps descended down the stairs. Alice and Emmett slowly came into view. Charlie turned to look at them. Alice rubbed the non-existed sleep from her eyes.

"Chief Swan?" Alice furrowed her eyebrows. "How come you're over so late?" They reached the living room and the three of us stood up in unison from the couch.

"Oh. Alice –" he started. I placed my hand at his shoulder and he stopped.

"Charlie, we should go now. I think Esme should explain…"

He nodded and we walked towards the front door. "Let me just get my coat. I have scrubs at the hospital to change into."

When we were walking out the door I could here Esme tell them to sit down so she could explain, just loud enough for Charlie to hear.

I rode with Charlie in the police cruiser. The silence we drove in was painful. Charlie was completely devastated. I wish he would have let me drive him there, but he refused.

The body was being kept in the morgue, ironically in the same space it had occupied earlier that day. Charlie walked in with me to ID the body. I advised him not to, that more than likely we would have to ID her by DNA anyways do to the burn scars, again he refused.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" I asked him cautiously.

"Yes." He breathed.

I slowly unzipped the body bag. When the zipper was half way down I carefully opened it. Charlie's breathing hitched, his heart pounded in his chest, and his blood pressure rose greatly. I turned to him and held him by the arm.

"Charlie you shouldn't do this to yourself. Please, you need to sit down. You're going to faint." He nodded stiffly and allowed me to lead him out of the morgue and into a waiting room. I gave him some aspirin and a sedative to help with his blood pressure.

A few minutes later, a friend of his, Harry Clearwater, showed up to keep him company. I excused myself and went back to the morgue.

The girl was completely unidentifiable. Her face was scared and badly burnt. Only her jaw, nose and eyebrows could be deciphered through the burnt skin. Most of the girl's hair was gone, and the rest of the body was completely charred. Again, sadness, guilt and heavy remorse caused my chest to tighten in a knot. I've had to fake many deaths in my time as a vampire, but never had I felt like this. Even if it wasn't Bella, it still represented her human self.

I removed my glasses and pinched the bridge of my nose. Just the idea of this ever happening to her, it breaks my heart to pieces. But _I_ know that she is safe, _I_ know that she is not this charred body lying on the gurney. But Charlie…he didn't know. He believes _this _is Bella. His darling daughter burned in a freak accident. He didn't deserve this. Yet I didn't even think of him as I bit her, only of my families' happiness.

Such a cruel trade.

* * *

_**Edward's POV**_

It had been two days since I saw my Bella. Two days of complete and utter hell. How the hell am I supposed to do this for the months to come?

Bella's funeral is being held today. I was pacing in my room in black dress pants, shirt, and tie. I was trying to think of anything that would keep me from having to go. I just wanted to stay locked up in my room and wait for Bella's phone call. But Alice had assured me that Bella's transformation wouldn't be complete until after the funeral so there was no way I would miss the funeral to wait for a call that she knew wouldn't come until later tonight. I still really didn't want to be there. Even just pretending Bella was dead, hurt beyond what words could explain.

Charlie had asked me to present a eulogy for her. He said that Bella would have wanted me to do it, that it would give me peace and closure. I don't know if I could stand in front of Bella's loved ones and give a speech about her death. It would kill me to have to speak as if she really were just that…dead. I wouldn't even know what to say…

"Edward we have to get going." _The wolves are going to be there too. I can't see anything._

Great. Not only will I have to make it through my love's funeral but I have to deal with those _dogs_ when I'm supposed to be grieving her?

Will this day never end?

* * *

I watched as person after person walked over to Charlie and Renee to give their condolences. The rest of my family had already gone to them, but I had held back. I didn't know if I could handle it. Renee looked so much like Bella… It was heartbreaking to see her with red puffy eyes, crying over her daughter's death. If it weren't for me she wouldn't even be here right now mourning over her supposed death.

_Edward, I know this is a funeral and all…but seriously stop mopping in the shadows. You know she's not really dead. Now come over and say hello to Renee._

I turned to my sister and slightly shifted my eyes side to side.

_Fine. But you better get your ass up to that podium and say something about Bella. _

Again I shifted my eyes from left to right.

In her thoughts she smiled at me and walked over to the podium.

"I'd like to say a few words." She started. The voices hushed and she continued. "As most of you know, Bella was my best friend. We had just met only a few months ago…but I considered Bella as a sister to me. She's brought my family so much joy over that last few months than we've had in years. I can only hope that where she is now she continues to bring everyone joy like she has to us here." She held a hand up in my direction and smiled. "My brother, Edward would also like to say a few words." _Now you have to come up here, brother dear._

Everyone's heads turned to the back of the church. I was leaning against one of the walls and nearly lost balance as their thoughts bounced loudly in my mind.

_Who is that boy?_

_What the hell does he have to say?_

_Damn Bloodsuckers._

_He's beautiful._

_The poor boy looks so pale…_

_He looks terrified._

_He's not taking her death too well…poor Edward._

_If I find out that you had anything to do with her death leech, I'll kill you._

_Maybe now that Bella's dead, I'll have a chance with Edward…_

I clenched my fists and held back a growl. I was expecting the dogs to piss me off. But seriously, I can't believe Lauren even showed up. How dare she think that at Bella's _funeral_? Clearly, the girl has problems.

I sighed and started the long walk down the isle. When I reached the podium Alice hugged me. _It'll be ok, Edward. Just speak from your heart._ She let me go and went to sit next to Esme and Carlisle.

As she passed me, I took a glance at the table beside the podium. Four large pictures were propped up on a table surrounding an urn. The first picture was of Bella's senior photo. The second was her as a toddler on Christmas with Renee and Charlie at her sides. The third, she was about 12 and sitting in her rocking chair reading a book, Romeo and Juliet. And the last one, she stood in front of me and I had my arms wrapped around her. She had the biggest grin and I was just gazing down at my beautiful angel's face. I remember exactly when we had taken that too, one of the happiest days of my life. It was one of the very few times she had allowed any of us to take a picture of her. I walked around to the podium and placed my hands on top of it.

"I don't even know where to start…" I whispered just loud enough for most of them to hear. If I were able to sweat from the nerves, I would be. This was much harder than I had imagined before. I closed my eyes and took a few moments to gather my thoughts.

"Before I met Bella, I was a completely different person. I never really _lived _until she came into my life. My days were just blending in together. I had nothing to live for." I looked out to my family and Esme smiled at me. "What my sister says is true. Bella has brought my family so much happiness. But she's brought me so much more. Bella taught me how to love."

Renee clutched at the handkerchief in her hand. She leaned into her Phil, and sobbed on his shoulder. _Oh Bella…She had told me once she wanted to marry him…and now she'll never have the chance… Bella…My sweet Bella…gone._

I froze, momentarily distracted by her mother's thoughts. Bella really told her that?

I almost smiled, but caught myself before I could. It wouldn't be right to smile at a time like this.

"She's the best thing that could have ever happened to me. I owe her so much…" I shook my head. "I tried my best to keep her out harms way…so many times." I lowered my gaze to the floor. "Only this time, it was out of my hands." My eyes stung. The venom tears that would never fall, danced along the lower edges of my eyes. "I'm so sorry, Bella." I whispered. "I love you, with all of my heart." I closed my eyes for a brief second before I ran as fast as humanly possible out of the church. I needed some fresh air.

I tried to burry away all the loud thoughts coming from inside the church. I didn't want to hear their grief. Mine alone was enough to induce a stroke in any human.

I sat on the steps of the church and held my knees to my chest. The rain poured down on me, soaking my clothes. My hair clung to the sides of my cheeks. It was a good thing that it was raining though and that the sun wasn't out.

I wasn't sure how long I sat unmoving. Sometime later I realized the rain had stopped pouring on me but it was still raining. When I looked up, Renee was standing over me with an umbrella. She sat down next to me and held the umbrella above us.

We sat in silence for a few minutes. I was oddly comforted by her presence. Her scent calmed me too. She smelled similar to Bella, though she smelled of lilies instead of freesias like Bella.

"She loved you much more than you could ever imagine." She said suddenly. I turned to look at her, but she was looking off into the sky. A small smile spread on her lips. "She spoke of you often. The first time she told me about you, she said she wanted to marry you. She said she had never felt the way she did with you. I thought you were just some silly crush. But after everything that happened in Phoenix…the way you looked at her. The way she looked at you…" She turned to meet my eyes. "I knew it was love that you two shared." She took my hand in hers. "I know what she meant to you, and it breaks my heart to see you this way. You have to be strong for her. Life will go on. She'll watch over us." She leaned forward and kissed my forehead.

At that moment the rain had stopped and the skies cleared up. Renee looked up and smiled. "She's already trying to brighten up our day." With that she patted my hand and stood to go back into the church.

Despite the emotions that were pulling at my insides, trying to tear me apart, I smiled. It was the first smile I've let play on my lips in days. For the first time in the last three days I allowed myself to be happy. Life _will_ go on. As soon as my Bella is in my arms again, we can start our new life together.

We have eternity.

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**So…what do you think?**

**I didn't leave it at a cliffy! (Although I know you guys are dying to know about the whole wolf thing…Sorry! But it just seemed like a good place to end the chapter)**

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**-Jan**


	5. The Wolves

**I think this might be one of the longest chapter so far…lol**

**Here ya go, wolf confrontation time! wo0t!**

**Enjoy!**

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Just as fast as the happiness came, it left.

Renee…Charlie. Bella would never be able to see them again. What have I done?

Bella will never be able to have another heart to heart with her mother ever again. She didn't even get to say goodbye to them. It was all too sudden, too soon. Will she hate me for it?

I buried my head in my hands and pulled at my hair. The thoughts of everyone around me flooded back through my mind. I tried desperately to push them away, but nothing worked, it was useless.

_My sweet Bella…I wish I could just hold her one more time…_

_You were so young…why…_

_I love you sweetheart. I hope you're happy where ever you are._

_It wasn't her time to go…_

_I knew that old truck of hers would be the death of her._

_Damn Cullen. I bet he broke up with her and she drove into those damn trees herself. Asshole._

_I wish I had talked to her more. Poor Bella, she didn't even finish high school…_

I choked on a sob as I heard Angela's thoughts. Bella didn't even finish high school! Now, she most likely will have to wait years before trying out school like the rest of us. What if she wanted to go to college? Now she has to wait. And even then, it won't be the same. She won't be human. She'll probably learn all there is to know before she can go back. By that time, school will be just as boring as it is to the rest of us.

My love will miss out on a lot of human experiences. I know she'll regret it. I will always regret not being able to let her have those experiences. Will she miss her human qualities? What of the ability to eat, sleep, and to dream… Will she miss that? A trait I knew she would definitely not miss would be her not-so-graceful balance, or clumsiness as she calls it. But I was always there to catch her warm body as she fell…but that won't happen anymore, would it? Or will Bella be the first ever clumsy vampire?

I will definitely miss my love's human traits. They were of course the first things that drew me to her. I will miss the flush of her cheeks, miss the way she mumbles and sighs my name in her sleep, the heat her body gave off that warmed me to no end, her heartbeat, and even the smell of her blood… Those are the very reason I should have stayed away! She tempted me with her blood…and body, then her soul. I sighed. I could never resist her. She calls to me in any and every form.

Carlisle's theory is that she is my singer, La Tua Cantante, he calls it. My fateful soulmate sent to me by God to challenge me in every way. Her blood calls to me to test my strength, my bloodlust. Her body called to the only human instinct that was left buried within me. When she called for me in her sleep, when she kissed me…and when she touched me in the most innocent ways. My mind would always wander to what I could do to her, what I wanted – want to do to her. All of the impure lust-filled thoughts I had towards her...Had I failed God's test by having those thoughts, or had I passed with flying colors for keeping my boundaries in place to keep her virtue intact? I know I have failed Him in the final and most important challenge. Her soul was now damned to my existence. I've let my Bella down. I sighed and shook my head to rid myself of those thoughts. My mind went back to thinking of all the questions I had been asking myself since my Bella had left with Jasper.

Is she still in great pain? Will her change be over soon? How much longer? Will she smell the same after her change? How long will I have to stay away from her? Will her eyes still be as expressive as they were when she was human? Will she remember me, remember our love, our most precious moments? Will I finally be able to read the thoughts that have been locked away in that silent mind of hers since the first day we crossed paths?

The last bit made me smile despite my current emotional state.

How much I would love to listen in on her thoughts even if it were only a few seconds, so I could finally know her way of thinking. What is it that she thinks about in her moments of hesitation? What does she really think of me, of herself…of us?

I was brought out of my musings by an inconspicuous cough behind me.

_Sorry to disrupt your internal monologue of mindless rambling, but the wolves will probably be confronting us soon._

I didn't acknowledge her or make any movement to stand up. Alice sighed and walked over to sit next to me. She lifted her arms and cradled me to her chest, successfully wrapping her tiny arms around me. She kissed the side of my head and held me tight against her. We sat there silently for a few minutes until _their_ thoughts grew louder and the musky dirt scent grew thicker in the air.

_There they are._

"Damn, leeches."One of them commented under his breath.

_Gross…bloodsucker PDA. _

Alice shifted and drew us both to our feet. I turned to see four tall and muscular Quileute's walking down the steps towards us. They stopped a few feet away from us and wrinkled their noses in disgust. The largest of them, Sam as I caught from their thoughts, took a step forward in front of the rest.

"We need to talk." He said roughly.

_Talk. Right, why doesn't Sam just let us kill them? _ The smallest, Embry, thought.

At that moment, Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie and Emmett came up from behind us to our side.

"Yes we do, but this is not the right place or time to speak. Maybe we should take this conversation else where?" Carlisle whispered knowing they could hear him perfectly. The three standing behind Sam glared at Carlisle. One of them stepped forward and began to growl at us. Sam turned to hiss at him, too low for my family to hear. But I could hear the conversation through their thoughts.

"_Paul, stop growling before someone notices." Sam hissed._

Paul immediately backed off and stopped growling. _"Sorry Sam. But I don't want to take no damn orders from a bloodsucker. This is our land, not theirs! We could do as we please!"_

I took a step forward against my better judgment, "This isn't your land. Forks is neutral ground. And I will not let this conversation be brought out at Bella's funeral!" I growled too low for human ears.

The four of them jerked their heads towards me. Their minds went straight into different ways they could tear me apart and were trying to decide on which way would cause me the most pain. All except for Sam's mind.

_He's right._

"You're right. This is _Bella's funeral_. In respect for _her_, we will talk about this somewhere else. Tonight meet us at the clearing southeast of your territory. It's about ten miles west of the boundary line."

I nodded stiffly. "Yes we know where that is. At what time shall we meet?" Carlisle asked.

"Ten, sharp. Don't be late." He looked at each of the other three and then they all marched off towards the church doors.

"Great." Rosalie muttered while rolling her eyes. "We should have just talked now to get this over with. Nice going, Edward!" she hissed. I ignored her and walked back into the church. I walked passed the wolves in the last pew. I walked passed our school mates, passed Renée and Charlie. As I reached Bella's pictures, I fell to my knees. I picked up a lit candle and proceeded to light one of the unlit candles. I could faintly hear Esme and Carlisle's gasps as they walked in through the church doors. When I set the candle down I crossed my arm over my shoulder, then to the other, and finally brought my hand to my lips.

"_In__ Nomini__ Patri__, __et__ Filii__, __et__ Spiritu__ Sancti." _I bowed my head with closed eyes, and for the first time in 83 years, I prayed.

I only hoped I could be forgiven.

"Amen."Carlisle whispered._ I love you, Edward, my son._

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I clutched at the phone in my hand and continued my pacing. I was staring to wear down the wood beneath my feet. It had been three days, twelve hours, eighteen minutes, and forty eight seconds…give or take a few…since Bella had been bitten. I had still yet to receive a phone call from her. Alice had assured me that she would call by now. It was a quarter till ten and still nothing.

There was a soft knock on my door followed by the creek of it being opened. I didn't turn around, I just stood in place and stared at the wall trying my hardest not to throw the phone against it. I set my phone on the couch to resist the urge to smash it.

"I thought you said Bella would call by now…" I said through clenched teeth.

"She was, but something must have changed. I don't see the call coming until tomorrow morning, now."

Tomorrow? I couldn't wait that long! I practically leapt onto my couch to retrieve my phone. As I was about to dial and call her myself, Alice's arm shot out to mine and took the phone out of my hands.

"I know you want to talk to her but right now we have to go, Edward. I'm sorry." _It's almost ten. We don't want to give the wolves anymore reason to come after us…_

I sighed and nodded. I took the phone back from her and put it in my pocket. I let Alice guide me downstairs by the arm. My sister would be my rock for the months to come. She will be the only one that will be able to keep me sane in my separation with Bella. I could keep watch over Bella through her visions. It was the only comfort I had of knowing that she was alright. I don't know what I would do without Alice. She smiled lovingly at me and patted my arm. Sometimes, I swear she was the mind-reader in the family.

When we got downstairs everyone was already there and ready to leave for the clearing. It only took us about three minutes of a steady run to get there. The forest was silent for awhile as we waited. The pounding of four sets of paws to the ground had all of us stiffen and form a line facing the direction of the footfalls.

One by one they appeared in their human form from the trees. The only clothing they wore was tattered jean shorts. This time they stayed much farther away from us. There thoughts jumbled up together as they observed us silently.

"One of you is missing." Sam stated suspiciously. From their thoughts they had already discussed this for hours before showing up.

_Shit._

_Of course they would notice…_

_I hope this works, Jasper you better be damn right._

_We'll be fine._

Alice reassured by showing me a vision she had of her and me at school the next day.

"Yes. I can explain that." Carlisle started. The youngest of them, Quil, scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Have the Quileute Elders told you of my family's gifts?"

Sam nodded. "You have a mind-reader." His eyes glanced in my direction and then back to Carlisle. "And have recently added a psychic and empath to your _coven_."

"My son Jasper is the empath. He is the one that is missing." Carlisle continued. "When Charlie came over to announce Bella's death Jasper had unwillingly absorbed all of our grief. It was a lot for him to bear, but he stayed as long as he could for us. When the rest of the town found out about her accident, it was just too much for him. The grieving of all the townspeople was more than he could handle. Before we could do anything he had ran off to get away from the physical pain it brought him to be anywhere near town."

"And _where_ did he go exactly?" Sam questioned.

"I don't know. He hasn't called us back yet…" Carlisle frowned.

_Just like what any other leech would do, run when things get rough. What a pansy._

"What happened the day of Bella's accident? Charlie tells us that she was with you just before it happened." Paul asked impatiently.

"We had a birthday party for Bella. She spent the night at our home and then left to her own home the next afternoon." Carlisle answered calmly.

_Why couldn't she have just listened to Jacob? If she would have visited him more instead of spending time with these damn leeches then maybe…_

Sam's thoughts drifted to a laughing Bella in the arms of a tan-skinned boy behind a bonfire. I nearly growled as I tried to bottle up the anger and jealousy the memory brought out in me. Just the thought of my Bella with some other _boy_ made my skin crawl. She is _mine_. I held back my growl and clenched my jaw tight to keep me from speaking. Sam noticed my tense stature and stiffened. He thought I wanted there to be a fight among us.

"Such a well thought out excuse, don't you think? You seem to have a well organized answer for all of our questions." Sam glared at Carlisle. "You can lie all you want. We won't stop until we find out the truth."

"It's not an excuse, it's the truth!" Emmett growled taking a step forward towards them. Paul took a step forward and glared at him. Paul's mind danced with excitement at the new prospect of a challenge. "You come here and assume that we had something to do with Bella's death, and now call us liars. You _dogs_ better not fu–"

"Watch it, Emmett." I hissed under my breath.

_Damn it, Edward. I can't just stand here and do nothing…_

I slightly turned to glare at him. He sighed and stepped back a few feet. Carlisle took a step forward.

"We're here on civil terms. You asked to meet with us, and here we are." Carlisle opened his arms and motioned to all of us standing behind him. "We didn't skip town. We have nothing to hide." Carlisle's thoughts revolved around begging God to forgive his lies.

"We know you had something to do with Bella's death, and when we find out exactly what happened, we will tear you all to shreds." He growled. He then quickly turned around and jumped into the air. A ripping sound rang through the clearing and a second later he was in wolf form. The other three retreated backwards after him. As they disappeared through the trees three distinct growls echoed throughout the forest.

Carlisle let out a frustrated sigh and Esme rushed to his side to comfort him. Rosalie slapped Emmett in the back of the head and scolded him for almost getting himself into a fight with the wolves and being so stupid. She then kissed him and held him close to herself. She had been worried that the wolves might have hurt him if it came to a fight against them.

I turned away to give them privacy. I felt so alone. I need Bella.

A soft hand grasped onto mine. "I'm here for you." She whispered. The sad smile on her face would have given her away if her thoughts hadn't betrayed her. _I miss Jasper. I wish I had him to comfort me. _"You know that I will always be here for you, Edward." _I miss her too, Edward. But we can be here for each other to get through this. _

I hugged her and placed a lingering kiss on the top of her head. I felt her silent sobs on my chest and pressed my cheek to her hair. I will be there for her as she was and will be there for me. I love my sister and would do anything in my power for her. And right now, all she needed was for me to hold her, and that's what I did.

After awhile the night grew silent again. Carlisle, Esme, Rosalie, and Emmett had all gone back to the house. Alice and I had stayed behind. We were perched on a rock watching the nearby waterfall when my phone vibrated. I quickly pulled it out. The words _"Jasper's Cell" _blinked on the screen. Before the second buzz finished I flipped open the phone.

"Bella…" I breathed jumping to my feet.

"Edward." The voice that spoke to me was reminiscent of her old one. Only this one was much more beautiful, it rang out like bells after every syllable. She had only said one word to me and already I could tell I would never tire of hearing her voice. If it was possible I loved her even more. A large grin replaced the permanent scowl my face had gotten used to over the last few days.

"Bella…Oh Bella. You have no idea how amazing it feels to hear your voice again."

"Likewise." She sighed. "Edward, you were completely right…"

Instantly my smile faded. The lump in my throat made it impossible for me to breathe. I was on the brink of clutching at my chest to hold it from falling apart. I felt my world start to crumble beneath me. My Bella…my love….she regretted it. She hates me. I knew this would happen.

"I'm so sorry…Oh God Bella. Please forgive me. I love you, Bella. I love you…I'm sorry, I couldn't…"

Alice placed her hand on my shoulder. _Edward. _Did she know this was how it was going to turn out? _Edward? _Why did she keep this from me? _Edward_… How could she–

"Edward!"

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**Review?**

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**-Jan**


	6. Confessions and Explanations

**Sorry for the long wait! I hope this chapter makes up for it. =)**

**The long awaited, Jasper POV! ^-^**

**Hope I did it well. Here's were we start to get into Jasper's history. **_**Italics**_** are his flashbacks.**

**Reviews make me update faster. *cough***

**Enjoy!**

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Bella was gripping at the sheets of the bed. Each wave of pain she felt came crashing down on me. I tried my best to calm her, to ease as much of the pain as I could. At first I tried to let my skin keep her cool, but when my body came in contact with hers, the searing pain of her change was just too much for me. So I settled with sitting on the floor a few feet away from her sending her constant waves of calm, joy, and love.

There were times were she couldn't hold back her screams, but for the most part she was silent. She was so strong. Bella was so determined to keep her screams at bay. In all the years I spent with Maria creating newborns, I had never seen someone go through the change quite like this.

With everything that's happened the last few months though, I can't help but blame myself for all the danger she's been put through. If it weren't for my past, she probably wouldn't be like this right now. I've put her through so much, and she doesn't even know it. None of them know. I would have to come clean soon. She deserved the truth.

The buzz of my cell phone brought me out of my thoughts.

_She'll be awake soon. Go out and find her a deer, leave it in the barn out back. Love you. –Alice._

I didn't want to leave Bella alone. But Alice must have seen Bella go after it when she woke, and it _would_ be smart to have something for her to drink close by. I quickly got up and replaced the wet towel over Bella's body with a new colder one. I left the house soon after. I decided to hunt a few deer for myself to ease my nerves. I hadn't dealt with a newborn for nearly fifty years. I knew my old memories would arise now that I would look after Bella and I needed to be well fed and alert so I could help her through the change. When I was done, I grabbed one of the deer and took it back to the house. I let it run loose in the small barn behind the house. I closed the latch on the barn door and then made my way back to Bella's side. I switched out the towels again and then sat back where I had been earlier. And there I sat for her last few hours as human.

Bella's heart quickened in pace. Her heart sounded as if it were pounding against her ribs, and it were about to rip straight through and out of her chest. It was almost over now. Her back arched upwards and the agonizing pain grew more intense than I had ever felt it before. When she fell back down to the bed, her heart gave one last thud. Then there was a deafening silence. I couldn't feel anything from her at all. Her body was lifeless, and completely emotionless. It was a few minutes before I felt anything from her again. But when they did arise, I was thrown back with the forcefulness of her emotions.

In the blink of an eye she sat upright in the bed. Her sudden panic pinned me down to the floor. Her eyes flew open and she blurred away to the far corner of the room. She crouched down and growled furiously at me. I crawled backwards, away from the bed and cautiously stood up.

"It's ok Bella. It's just me, Jasper." I whispered. I didn't want to scare her. I knew her senses were extremely sensitive and much more magnified during her first few hours.

"Jasper?" She breathed.

As soon as my name left her lips, her eyes went wild. She crouched down and whipped her head frantically. I could feel her thirst rip through my own body as she growled and ran off at vampire speed out of the room. I could hear the back door being ripped off its hinges and then a moment later there was a loud crash. She was running towards the steady heartbeat. I strode to the window and jumped out of it, easily landing on the balls of my feet. As soon as I hit ground I took off after her.

She ran to the barn out back. The double doors were in ruins now. When I walked through the rubble on the ground I saw Bella crouched over the deer in the middle of room.

She stood up and wiped the blood from her face. She sniffed the air and immediately turned around in my direction. She stood there silent and unmoving for a moment and then finally a smile spread over her face. "Jasper!" She ran towards me with arms wide to embrace me in the strongest hug imaginable. I could feel my muscles straining and bones aching as her grip was starting to become painful. I didn't dare break her hug. She pulled away after a while and grinned.

I was about to ask her if she would like to go out on her first hunt but she shifted and turned her attention to her arm. The sun had broken through the cracks of the old wooden barn. Her skin sent various shades of colored dots all around the walls. After a few moments of admiring the intricate details of her diamond like exterior, her gazed shifted back to me. She gasped and took a step back away from me.

Her hand rose to cover her mouth and a forceful wave of horror left her. She was afraid of me. Confused, I took a step back from her and held my hands up in surrender so she'd know I wouldn't harm her. As I did that I realized that the sun was directly hitting me from the now open door way. I lowered my arms and rubbed my forearm self consciously. I turned away from her.

"Jasper, what happened to you?" she gasped.

Flickers of memories began to resurface in my mind. Each encounter with the newborns and other armies' attacks left forever imprints on my skin. Every fight…every vampire I killed….

I flinched and sighed, she would need to learn about my past some day. I turned back to her and carefully reached out for her hand. I traced her double crescent scars on her right wrist with my index finger. She shuddered.

"The same thing that happened to your hand," I answered quietly. "Repeated a thousand times. Our venom is the only thing that leaves a scar."

Horror, disgust, sadness, sympathy and then rage came from her. Her constant and fast pace change in emotions were leaving me feeling dizzy. It also didn't help that her emotions were much stronger than I could usually feel.

"I didn't have quite the same…upbringing as my adopted siblings. My beginning was something else entirely." I continued. Her brows furrowed and she looked away trying to figure out what I meant. I could feel her confusion and sadness but her hunger was starting to overpower her again. My venom started to spill over my teeth, her thirst was getting worse.

"Before I tell you my story you must first hunt." Her hand went up to her throat. I heard her swallow the excess venom and nodded. I smiled and offered her my hand again. She stiffened at my sudden movement. Embarrassed, she shook her head and then reached out for my hand. I led us out through the front of the barn where the door barely hung on its hinges.

"Sorry about the door." She whispered as we walked over the rubble on the ground.

"Don't worry about it. It can be easily fixed." I smiled. We walked over to the edge of the forest and her fear slowly began to grow. It stopped her dead in her tracks.

"What's wrong?" I asked her.

"I don't know how to…"

"How to run?" I asked. She nodded. "It's the same as running as a human. Once you start running your instincts will take over and you'll break into a full speed run. You'll probably even be faster than me." I laughed. Her fear rose even more and I sent her a dose of confidence.

"But what if I… I trip or something? You know my balance is horrible."

"Well you didn't fall when you ran for the deer in the barn." I grinned. I cocked my head to the side. "Come on, it'll be ok. Besides if you fall it won't hurt. And more than likely you'll catch yourself before you hit the ground." She nodded but still wouldn't move. I chuckled and sent her another dose of confidence from my hand to hers. She smiled up at me and then took off running, pulling me along with her.

I was having a hard time keeping up with her. When she noticed, she slowed down a little. Suddenly she let my hand go and raced off to the right crashing through branches.

I followed her scent and footfalls. When I came across her, she was leaning over a deer and drinking greedily from it. When she was done she jumped up and chased down the scent of a small panther. I was starting to get thirsty myself when we came across another heard of small deer. I almost took one down but before I could Bella growled possessively. I immediately backed down and backed away into the trees. I knew better than to provoke a newborn while they were feeding. I have plenty of scars to remind me of what could happen. I absentmindedly rubbed one of the scars on my shoulder, my first of many.

_In the air I could smell many lingering scents. I listened for a warm heartbeat. To my delight, I heard two. I followed the sweet sound through the darkened ally and reached a pier. Two girls walking hand in hand with umbrellas over their heads and billowing dress skirts over tight corsets. My mouth watered at the smell of their blood, but the lust I felt for them was just as strong. They were beautiful. _

_The wind shifted and I caught the scent of a newborn that Nettie had created just a few short days ago. I whipped my head in the direction of the potent scent. The dark haired vampire launched himself towards the two girls. He caught the pretty brunette by the arm and swiftly sank his teeth in to her neck. The second girl, the blonde beauty, swung her umbrella uselessly across the shoulder of the newborn. He was too distracted by the blood he was swallowing to notice her screams and pathetic attempt to hurt him._

_I decided to help him. The other girl's screams would attract unnecessary attention to the scene. _'We must stay well hidden, and not let others know about us'_ That's what Maria keeps telling us. I strode over to them and quickly took the blonde in my arms. I doused her in calm and trust. She instantly stopped screaming and gazed into my eyes. I could see my piercing black eyes staring back at me in hers. I felt a hint of lust from her and I smirked. I would definitely have enjoyed her company in my bed if I were not so thirsty. I placed my hand firmly at the back of her neck and pulled her towards my waiting lips._

_A sudden growl was the only warning I had before I was thrown backwards into a wall. The searing pain on my shoulder brought me out of the haze of feeding. I opened my eyes to see the dark haired newborn with his teeth sunken deep in to my skin. I forcefully shoved him away and crouched in defense, growling loudly. _

"_Mine!" he snarled. "She was mine!"_

_He threw himself towards me aiming at my neck with his mouth wide open. I didn't hesitate. I quickly moved to the right, successfully dodging the snap of his jaw. I turned around and jumped on his back, latching my teeth to his neck in the same swift movement. He cried out in pain. The sound of his steel skin ripping rang in my ears and his piercing growl broke into nothing as I dismembered his head from his shoulders. I let his body fall to the ground and I discarded the head a few feet away. I clutched at my shoulder and saw a drop of venom spill from the wound, though it was already starting to heal._

_A horrified shriek from behind me made me instantly turn around. The blonde girl had her hand at her throat and her eyes shifted from me to the mangled body at my feet. Her eyes widened and then she broke out into a run towards the city lights. _

_I smirked as I took my time following her. When she was but a few feet away I quickly ran in front of her. Her body collided with mine, her breasts plush to my chest. I wrapped my arm around her lower back and held her closer. _

"_A lovely lady like you shouldn't be out so late in the dark." I said huskily and grinned. I twirled a strand of her golden locks in my hand and then traced her jaw line with my finger down to her throat. Her eyes widened in horror as I lowered my mouth to her neck again. She struggled against me, but her efforts were hopeless. _

_When I was through draining her, I laid her on a bench just off the boardwalk from the pier where she would easily be found at daybreak. When the humans find her they would think some animal got to her while she was walking alone at night._

_I walked back to where I left the other newborn. I would see if he had put himself together already. I wouldn't want Nettie to get angry at me for losing her another newborn. When I got there I was met with a fire instead of his body. Maria stood behind the flames throwing in the body of the young brunette he had managed to feed from before he had attack me._

"_Mi __querido__! I'm so glad it wasn't you. You must be careful when you feed. You newborns have _problemas_ with sharing." She laughed. _

_She smiled and walked closer to me. She lifted her hand and caressed my face. I felt a sudden burst of lust from her and my knees buckled. I stepped away from her slightly. I hadn't known before that she lusted for me. She frowned but then smiled quickly after._

"_Con __tiempo__, mi __querido__. In time, you will see. __Ceras__ mio."_

From that day forward I learned to caution myself when it came to newborns. Maria saw my potential and helped me gain more control over the newborns. If only I knew then what I know now…

Seven deer, three panthers and one mountain goat later Bella's thirst waned and she was able to pull away from her instincts. She walked towards the tree I was perched on and cocked her head to the side.

"What you doing up there, Jasper?"

"Just making sure to stay clear from your feeding. You were starting to get territorial." I said as I jumped down from the tree.

She turned away and hid her face from me with a curtain of hair.

"Nothing to be embarrassed about, Bella. It's normal newborn behavior. I'm used to it."

"No! That's not why. It's just…well, look at me!" she pointed to her blood stained shirt. It was ripped in various places and dirt was caked all over it.

"Don't worry about it. With practice you'll get better with keeping yourself clean." I grinned. "Just wait till you see Emmett hunt. He gets worse than you are right now every time he hunts. He loves to play with his food."

"Figures, I always thought that he was a messy eater. He's such a kid sometimes." She smiled.

"Here, take this. I have another underneath." I lifted my shirt and took it off in one swift movement. I held it up for her to take. She hesitated but then reached out to retrieve it. I turned around to give her some privacy. A few seconds later she stood beside me with my shirt on that was too big for her. I laughed silently at the way the shirt hung from her frame. The sleeves on the shirt came down to her forearms and the neckline slightly fell off on of her shoulders. The hem of the shirt was at her knees. With a smile, I motioned for her to follow me. We walked at human pace through the woods.

"At first you won't be able to control how you hunt. Your instinct to drink will be too overwhelming for you to try and keep yourself clean. Over time you'll be able to concentrate more on what you're doing and keep the blood from spilling. I can show you how to do that later, if you'd like." She smiled and nodded.

We walked for some time in silence until we reached a small river.

"Where are we?" She asked suddenly.

"Denali, Alaska. I brought you here about a day ago. The rest of the family is still in Forks. Do you remember what happened?"

"I remember most of it. I heard you guys talking about some kind of treaty you had with werewolves and that biting me would break it. I didn't even know werewolves existed! I'm sorry I've caused so much trouble for everyone…" she frowned.

"Bella. It was my fault. If I wouldn't have attacked you none of this would have happened." I turned away from her in shame. If I had better control she'd still be in Forks with Edward, she'd still be _human_.

Of all the emotions I thought I would feel from Bella, the least likely of those is what she felt. I expected anger, fury, or even sadness of her loss. But instead I felt overwhelming _guilt_.

"Why do you feel so guilty? I'm the only guilty one here." I turned back around and found her biting her lip with her gaze averted towards the trees in the distance. "Bella?"

"It wasn't your fault, Jasper…It was all me." her eyes met mine. "I…I cut myself on purpose."

"You what?" I asked shocked. "You purposely sliced your finger? Why on earth would you do that in a room full of _vampires_? Edward was right. You have no self preservation at all!"

"It was a sudden decision on my part." She said softly. "I was just so angry and frustrated at Edward. Just before we got to the house we had argued about him changing me. He was so keen on making sure that would never happen. He was an idiot to think I would let that topic go so easily. When I started opening the gift I suddenly thought, 'What would happen if I cut myself? Would he bite me? Would they be too late to suck the venom out this time? Would I get that lucky?' All I could think about was being one of you so I could be with Edward forever. I was being completely selfish, I know. I feel horrible for the way I've done things and for all the problems I've caused now. I had a horrible feeling that if something didn't happen soon, he would realize I wasn't worth the trouble and leave me…" Her voice cracked and she took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd be the one to bite me, I hope that in time you'll forgive me."

I carefully moved beside her and took her in my arms. She stiffened but relaxed at my touch. "I have nothing to forgive, if you forgive me for biting you. I just want things to blow over with the wolves so we can all get on with our lives. Edward is a fool to think that he could be with you as a human. He will be much happier now that he has you for eternity. Even if the way you came about it was not the best, I know you did it because you love him so much." She held me tightly and I could feel her silent sobs on my chest. I soothed her as best as I could with my gift. We stood like that in silence for a good while before she spoke again.

"I won't be able to see Edward for a while, will I?" The calm in her voice didn't match the agony of sadness I felt from her. I frowned.

"No, they have to stay in Forks for a couple of months. The wolves will be watching over the family to see if we had anything to do with your death." A sharp pain of grief struck her. "I'm sorry you won't be able to say good bye to your parents…"

"It's ok. Maybe one day when my thirst is better under control I can visit them while they sleep or maybe just watch over them at times. I'll miss them…but it's nothing compared to what I'm gaining." She smiled sadly.

She shrugged out of my grasp and walked over to the river. She washed her hands and face that were still covered in blood.

A nice breeze hit my face sending the musky smells of the forest my way. I closed my eyes and let the feel of the wind on my skin calm me.

I felt Bella's hesitation right before I felt her reach out for my arm. My eyes flew open and I looked down at her. The sun was shinning upon my skin. She traced the overlapping scars at my elbow.

"Tell me what happened." She whispered. I sighed and led her to a cluster of boulders that lined up at the edge of the forest overlooking the river. I sat down on one of the large rocks and she sat in front of me in the grass. I was quite for awhile. She was seemingly distracted by the way the grass moved and felt under her body. She let her fingers lace through the weeds at her feet. She grew impatient and looked up at me.

"Did Edward tell you anything about my history, at all?" I asked her. She furrowed her brows in frustration.

"My memory is a bit fuzzy, but as far as I can remember he just said that you didn't always drink from animals, that you drank from humans long before you joined the family. That's why it was much harder for you to be around humans."

I nodded. "Yes that's true. I had lived more than a century drinking from humans before I met Alice. I didn't know there was any other way." Bella shuddered. "Let me start from the beginning. It was 1864 and I was a Major for the Confederate Army in Houston. I was only twenty, though everyone thought I was much older. One night while I was traveling alone from one city to the next, I came across three women…

_The skies were dark and moon was clouded over. It was difficult to see more than a few feet ahead of my horse. He galloped at a slow speed to avoid stumbling over something in the darkness. _

_My horse stopped suddenly. I looked out into the darkness to see what had made him stop. A few feet away from me stood three beautiful women standing still, staring at me. I quickly dismounted and walked towards them. They were probably lost and headed for the town. I would help them find their way if needed. _

_I walked closer to them and instantly stopped as the dim light of the moon fell upon their faces. I was stunned. They were, without question, the three most beautiful women I had ever seen. _

_The three had such pale skin and striking features. They seemed quite young, between the ages of fifteen to seventeen. The small black-haired girl looked like a porcelain doll in the moonlight. One was a pale blonde with high cheekbones. The last was the tallest, slim and also blonde. I knew they couldn't have been from the town I had just left. I would have remembered seeing them there. _

"_He's speechless." The tall girl said with a high, wind chime like voice. _

_The other blonde leaned in towards me and inhaled deeply. "Mmm, lovely."_

_The tiny brunette put her hand on the girls arm and pulled her backwards. She spoke quickly and in a hushed voice. "Concentrate, Nettie…" I couldn't hear the rest of what she was saying but the hum of her voice was musical and sharp._

"_He looks right – young, strong, an officer…" She spoke out loud. She moved closer and walked in a slow circle around me. I couldn't take my eyes off her. "And there's something more…do you sense it? He's…compelling."_

"_Oh yes." The tall blonde agreed, leaning towards me again and taking another deep breath. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she closed her eyes quickly._

"_Patience." The small brunette scolded. "I want to keep this one."_

_The girl frowned. "You'd better do it, Maria. If he's important to you." She backed away. She seemed annoyed. "I kill them twice as often as I keep them."_

_I was confused by her words. I thought I should be frightened by what she said. She was a killer? But still I was too entranced by the brunette that was still walking a circle around me. She stopped in front of me suddenly. She was now only a few inches away from my face. "Yes, I'll do it. I really do like this one." She turned her head towards the other two behind her. "Take Nettie away, will you? I don't want to have to protect my back while I'm trying to focus."_

_The hair on the back of my neck stood at attention. My instincts told me that I was in danger. I had a feeling that the angel-faced blonde had meant it when she spoke of killing, but the captivating woman in front of me and my attraction towards her overruled my instincts to run. _

"_Let's hunt." The short blonde agreed. She reached out for the third girl's hand and they swiftly walked away leaving me alone with this beauty, this Maria. I couldn't help but follow their movements though. They were extremely graceful as they sprinted toward the city. They were fast and it seemed as if they were floating over the grass. The white dresses they wore blew out behind them like wings. And just as quickly as they had appeared, they were gone. I blinked in amazement. They had just disappeared into thin air. I turned my attention back to look at Maria. She was watching me with a curious gaze. She looked so pale, like a ghost. _

"_What is your name, soldier?" she asked suddenly._

"_Major Jasper Whitlock, ma'am." I said politely._

"_I truly hope you survive, Jasper." She said gently. "I have a good feeling about you."_

_She took a step closer and inclined her head. I thought she was going to kiss me. I didn't know if I should kiss her back. It would be so improper of me. But then panic settled in as she leaned in towards my throat. I was frozen in place. _

"…I barely realized what was going on. After she bit me I couldn't think of anything else but the pain. Three days later, I was introduced to my new life. I didn't know where I was, or how I got there. Maria, Nettie, and Lucy explained things to me. They told me what I was and how they met. They hadn't been together long, but stayed together because they wanted revenge. Maria wanted her territories back, and that's why she created me. So I could serve in her army and help her gain back control."

"She wanted her territories back? What do you mean?" Bella asked.

"Long ago, even before my time, there were some vampires who fought for territorial rights to larger cities down south. The bigger the city the more we could feed with out being noticed. These vampires created newborn armies to fight off other vampires and claim the land they fed at. It was mayhem at times. Newborns are very difficult to control."

"Why is that?" she questioned.

"Newborn vampires, within their first year, are much stronger, faster, and much more emotional imbalanced than vampires with more experience in this life. Newborns act mostly on instinct and strength. If not trained right, an older vampire could easily lose a fight between a newborn. The newborn armies that were created were very deadly and when they weren't controlled they would wreck havoc on the cities. Some would even expose themselves to the humans. That's when the Volturi would step in."

"What's a Volturi?"

"The Volturi are like the royalty of our kind. They keep vampires in check and make sure that our secret stays just that. They are the largest known coven of vampires with many of them gifted, about twenty three of them now." I smirked. "The Cullen Coven is the second largest."

She gasped. "There's a coven of twenty three?!"

I nodded. "Years ago when the wars were at their peak, the Volturi came down to Mexico and cleaned house. They killed off most of the newborn armies in the south and only left the few like Maria's army untouched. They found her way of controlling the newborns quite effective and admired her for it." Bella was confused again so I elaborated. "You see, after a newborn's first year their strength begins to fade into what any other vampire's strength would be. Maria had no use for weak vampires in her army, so after their first year she would kill them off and created new ones." Bella shuddered and tucked her knees under her chin.

"But she kept you alive…was it because of your gift that she didn't kill you like the rest of the newborns?" She asked quietly.

"Yes and no." I gazed out towards the river and followed the ripples downstream. I tried to hold back the memories that flittered through my thoughts. "My talent was useful to her. She trained me well, and helped me learn to control the newborns. As our numbers began to grow, she put me in charge of looking after them. I would take them out to the city to feed and I would command them in battle. When the time came to _dispose_ of them, it was my job to do that as well."

Bella winced. "So your scars were from the vampires you fought in battle?"

"Most are. Many are from fights that broke out within the army. Like I said before, newborns tend to be very territorial. It's not too smart to sneak up on them either, newborns are startled fairly easy and our first instinct is to defend ourselves. I got caught in the crossfire a lot." I looked up at the sky and realized the day had gone by without notice. The sun was starting to set.

"We should get back. Edward is probably waiting impatiently for your call."

Her eyes widened. Her first reaction was joy and longing, but it quickly turned to dread and sadness.

"Hey," I took her face in my palm and sent her a calming wave. "What's wrong? Don't you want to talk to Edward?" I asked.

"Of course, I do. But what if he's angry with me? What if he never wants to see me again…"

"Ridiculous. He loves you. Now come on, he's probably pacing a hole in the floor waiting for your to call him." I grinned.

She smiled and we took off running back towards the house.

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**I know I didn't get to the call…But I'm pretty sure you guys can tell how it will go. I just needed to stop here. Next Chapter will be Edward's POV again and will continue with the call. =)**

**Hope you guys liked the chapter. **

**Sorry to those who don't like that I made Bella confess that she deliberately cut herself with the wrapping paper. I just had to do that because I remember reading that part in New Moon and I shouted to myself "I bet she did that shit on purpose!" Oh, and especially how Kristen Stewert said "Ouch..papercut." in the trailer for New Moon. It sounded more like "Opps I got a papercut...who's gonna take a bite out of me first?!" to me. ****lol...and I got a kick out of it.**

**Anyways...**

**Let me know what you think!**

**-Jan**

**Spanish Dialogue Translations:**

_Mi Querido _– My love

_Con tiempo _– In time

_Ceras Mio _– You'll be mine


	7. Something to Be Happy About

**I KNOW I KNOW! You guys must hate me right now! I'm so sorry it's taken months for this new chapter to come out. It just seemed every time I went to finish the chapter something would always come up, weather it be work, my laptop getting messed up, or just plain old writer's block. Hope you guys can forgive me?**

**This chapter was originally 30+ Word Document pages long but I ended up splitting it into 2 chapters. That's why this chapter is a bit shorter. The other is already written and ready to post but I'm going to wait a few hours before I post it. I want to go over it and make sure everything is perfect with it. This chapter and next will be in Edward's POV and then after that I'm switching over back to Jasper. My plot starts to kick in with Jasper, so be ready for lots of twists and turns. =)**

**Reviews motivate me to write quicker! I swear. XD**

**Thank you for your patience! Here's Ch 7!**

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_**Previously on Domino Effect:**_

"_Bella…" I breathed jumping to my feet._

"_Edward." The voice that spoke to me was reminiscent of her old one. Only this one was much more beautiful, it rang out like bells after every syllable. She had only said one word to me and already I could tell I would never tire of hearing her voice. If it was possible I loved her even more. A large grin replaced the permanent scowl my face had gotten used to over the last few days._

"_Bella…Oh Bella. You have no idea how amazing it feels to hear your voice again."_

"_Likewise." She sighed. "Edward, you were completely right…"_

_Instantly my smile faded. The lump in my throat made it impossible for me to breathe. I was on the brink of clutching at my chest to hold it from falling apart. I felt my world start to crumble beneath me. My Bella…my love….she regretted it. She hates me. I knew this would happen._

"_I'm so sorry…Oh God Bella. Please forgive me. I love you, Bella. I love you…I'm sorry, I couldn't…"_

_Alice placed her hand on my shoulder. _Edward._ Did she know this was how it was going to turn out? _Edward?_Why did she keep this from me? _Edward…_ How could she–_

"Edward!" Alice yelled as she pulled my face down to look at her. She narrowed her eyes at me. I began to pull away but her small hands gripped tighter on my cheeks. _You idiot…let her finish!_

"Err…Edward?" Bella's worried voice came over the phone. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but nothing came out. Alice let out a frustrated sigh followed by an eye roll. Before I realized what was happening, she snatched the phone out of my hand.

"Bel-la!" Alice grinned and walked away from me. Suddenly very annoyed, I walked after her. She turned on the spot and started walking the other way. I kept right in step with her.

"Alice!" I could almost hear the smile in Bella's her voice. It only slightly lifted my worries. Of course she wouldn't be angry at Alice…but what about me?

"Sorry about that, my _brother _tends to be quite overdramatic and loves to jump to conclusions. But you know all about _that_." Bella's laugh rang through the phone's receiver. The sound of it made my chest feel lighter. My steps became more urgent as I tried to take the phone away from Alice. She moved away effortlessly each time, and my hand only grasped at air.

Alice laughed as she jumped into the air, landing on the boulder to my right. She stood with her hand at her hip, the other holding the phone to her ear. I narrowed my eyes at her before leaping up towards her. She giggled again when I missed her as she stepped off the rock. _Now stop being an idiot…she's not mad at you!_

"Anyways, I'm going to give the phone back to Edward before he ruins my new shirt trying to get it back from me." Without waiting for a response, Alice threw the phone in the air in my direction. I quickly caught it and held it up to my ear. Alice smiled and ran off through the woods heading back to the house to give us some privacy.

"Hi." I said sheepishly. I grimaced and hit my forehead with the palm of my hand. After all my waiting to talk to her the best I could do was 'hi'?

"Hey." She replied instantly. I could almost picture her playing with the hem of her shirt and biting her lower lip as she spoke.

"Bella, I'm – "

"I love you, Edward."

Funny how four words could cause so much emotion in a split second. My heart nearly exploded with joy. She loved me. She remembers me…She remembers us, her love. My balance fumbled as the truth and love behind her words hit me, the relief flooded through me and I let myself fall backwards onto the ground.

"And I love you, more than ever." We were silent for a few moments and then I heard her sigh.

"I'm sorry I brought this on everyone. I didn't know about the wolves. Jasper told me everything that happened. Please don't be mad at him, if anything be mad at me." I could hear her pacing in the background as she whispered. "I hope you're not too mad at me..."

"Bella…" I sighed and shook my head. "You have nothing to be sorry for. And I could never be mad at you. It's in our nature to crave blood. I could never hold that against you. I'm the one that's sorry. I should have been more careful. I should have never forced you to come to the party. If you wouldn't have then –"

"Stop." She growled. I was taken back by the new sound. The fact that _my Bella_ just growled forced me to shut up and listen. I didn't know what to think of it. My mind still thought of her as a fragile human girl, it was bizarre to hear it come from _her _of all people.

"If I'm not allowed to be sorry, then neither are you. What's done is done, and there's no going back now."

I didn't know what to say. I still felt horribly guilty for what I had caused.

"Is it what you expected?" I asked suddenly. "Being a vampire, I mean." I added when she didn't answer.

"Honestly? It wasn't exactly what I had expected, but then again, you didn't really tell me much about it, so I didn't have much to go on."

"This wasn't what was supposed to happen, so it was moot point to tell you about it…"

"Seriously Edward, did you honestly think either of us would have ended up happy with your decision to keep me human?" She hissed in anger. I grimaced. Hissing would be another new sound I would have to learn to get used to hearing from her.

"But you would have been _human_. You would be _alive_. It's what would have been best. I took that away from you_._"

"What's best for me? Or what's best for _you?_" She snapped.

"Bel–"

"No, Edward. You can't make decisions for me based on what only _you _think is best for me. I think, no I _know _it's better this way. If I was still human I would still be torturing you with my blood! Not to even mention I would have grown old while you would have stayed young and beautiful. Besides, I was accident prone, this would have eventually happened anyways."

"Not if I could help it…" I blurted out.

"You would have left me." It wasn't a question. Her voice was soft and distant.

"I would have done what was best for you. If it meant having to leave so that we wouldn't be a danger to your life anymore…"

"What's best for _me_? Enough about about what's best for you? For _us_?" Her voice broke at the end. She took a small breath before continuing. "You _obviously_ didn't know what's best if you didn't want to change me yourself." Before I could say anything back she spoke out again. "If this wouldn't have happened, you would have let me _die_, Edward."

I let her words sink in. Would I have let her die? If I had left her, would I have had the strength to stay away and let her die of old age? I could barely handle the thought of losing her to Death. I would have surely followed her right after if that were the case.

Bella sighed heavily. "Look, it doesn't matter. I'm like you now so I don't have to worry about dying anymore. I just wish you would have wanted me enough to _want_ to turn me."

"Bella…you have no idea how much I want you." I sat upright and pinched the bridge of my nose. "I struggled every day with my want for you. The thought of you being unbreakable…immortal… It's my deepest desire, yet my worst nightmare. You won't be able to change, or have children, you have to move every few years, leaving and starting over new, living off blood, it's not the life I wanted for you, you deserved better. And because of all that…I can't help but feel selfish."

"I don't understand."

"I'm selfish because now that you're a vampire, I want you even more. This way of live isn't easy and I want to be there for you, but I can't. I want to be by your side and never even think about leaving you again. I want you–no, I _need _you in my life. There's no doubt about that in my mind. Ever since I let Jasper drive away with you three days ago, it physically _hurts_ to be apart from you."

"Oh, _Edward…_" she breathed. She stayed silent for awhile. I waited impatiently to hear her reaction to my admission.

"You shouldn't feel selfish to want me, Edward. It's not selfish when I want the same things you do. I need you in my life just as much as you need me. I can't see myself without you. Besides, I never really cared to have children, I don't care if I have to move and start over new all the time. Don't you see? It doesn't matter what I am or where life takes me, _as long as I'm with you._" Her voice was so full of love and longing. I could feel my own love for her grow with every word she spoke. And here I thought it was impossible to love her even more than I already did. "Hell, I don't even mind living off blood. Mmm…It's quite tasty actually."

I couldn't help but laugh as I heard her hum in delight.

"I love you, Edward. Never forget that."

"Now how could I ever forget something like that?" I teased. "I love you too."

"Just out of curiosity," I asked as I quickly went over in my mind of our conversation so far. "What exactly were you going to say earlier when you said '_Edward, you were completely right_'?"

"Oh, right. I was just going to say you were right about the running. It's completely exhilarating. It's like nothing I've ever felt before. I thought I was going to be scared of it, or that I would fall flat on my ass, but it was just really incredible."

"I told you, it feels completely different once you've changed. It's definitely my favorite pastime." I chuckled nervously. "I really do jump to conclusions though, don't I? I really thought you were confirming my worst fears. I thought you were going to hate me…"

"I could never hate you."

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"So you finally got it out of your system then?" Emmett bellowed. _No more mopping around thinking she hates you._

I only nodded towards him.

"I can't wait to see what she looks like! It's so not fair that both of you get to see her before any of us do." He continued.

I only then remembered that Alice still hadn't let me see a vision of what Bella looked like now.

"Actually…" I started. Alice bounced into the room with a wide grin on her face.

"Hmm...what if I don't _want_ to show her just yet?" Alice smirked.

"Alice…" I warned. She stuck her tongue out at me. "Please…" I breathed. She sighed, defeated. _Fine! Fine. Gosh, I can't even mess with you anymore! _

My sight went out of focus as I was pulled into Alice's vision.

My love was running into the forest, her bare feet pounding against the dirt. Her hair seemed to have grown about an inch or two, and there were slight tints of red in each strand. Her skin was paler, for a second I worried about her health, but as the vision focused on her face, I was reminded that Bella was different now. I no longer needed to worry about her becoming ill. I didn't think she could become any more perfect than she was as a human, but her lips were fuller, her skin smoother, her lashes longer, and her eyes… Her eyes were crimson red.

The shock that overtook me wasn't because of the new shade of her eyes, it was the emotion built up behind them. It had always been her eyes. Her mind's door had always been sealed shut to me…but her eyes. Her eyes always gave her away. That look was unmistakable.

Joy.

I didn't know how to feel about it. She enjoys the perks of this so called '_life'_, but what of the negatives? When she finally realizes that being a _vampire_ is not as wonderful as she thought it would be, when she realizes all that she's lost, would she still forgive me for taking away her humanity?

A blow to the stomach brought my sight back to the living room.

"Damn it, Edward. Can't you just be happy that she's happy?" Alice pulled her arm away and stormed out of the room.

I sighed and sat down on the couch. I closed my eyes and focus only on Bella and her happiness. I imagined myself next to her, holding her hand in mine as we ran together through the trees, the wind whipping away at her hair as it flowed behind her, the way she would look up at me through her lashes and smile…

"Hey little bro!" Emmett boomed as he jumped right beside me on the couch. Under the pressure of his weight and fall, one of the couch legs cracked through the floorboard. "Shit…Don't tell Esme! I swear I'll fix it before she gets back…"

I groaned as I stood up and walked over to the love seat. "What do you want now Emmett?" He grinned and stretched out over the sofa, with his hands behind his head and his legs crossed over the arm rest.

"Can't I just spend some quality time with my younger brother without having some hidden ulterior motive?" _Benefit of the doubt, Eddie?_

I rolled my eyes and motioned for him to continue. He didn't say anything, but his thoughts were revolving around what Bella might look like as a vampire. "You're not doing her any justice. She looks much more beautiful than that." I smiled.

He smirked and sat up quickly, leaning his weight on his forearms. I searched his mind to find what he really wanted to talk about, but his thoughts were well guarded. But then his mind slipped. I growled and leapt at him, but he was already across the room, letting out a round of loud laughter. I growled louder and crouched low to the ground. "STOP!"

"Oh come on Eddie-poo, don't tell me the thought hasn't crossed your mind!" He laughed. I charged at him again, this time he wasn't so lucky. I caught him by the throat and slammed him on the ground. His laughter became louder as he used his strength to roll us around. He lifted me up and held me in a headlock against the wall. "Admit it, Edward! You can't tell me you haven't thought about all the things you could do with Bella now that's she's a vampire! She's _unbreakable_ now…You could even rough her up a bit. I'm sure she's _dying_ to see that part of you."

I let out another throaty growl and twisted myself out of his grip. I grabbed him by the shoulders and used all of my strength to throw him backwards. He flew through the air and across the room. Emmett was already through the glass and twenty feet out into the back yard before I could hear the glass shatter. I rushed across the room and jumped out behind him before the pieces could hit the ground. He was already running and I could hear his booming laughter echo throughout the forest. His mind's voice was now merely a whisper as I gave up and sat on the edge of the porch stairs.

The last thought I heard from him was a very heated image of Bella tackling me to the ground ripping off my bloodied shirt. She quickly leaned towards me and bit down on my shoulder, causing her to moan and for me to roll her around and kiss her like I had never dared to before…

I surprised myself with a laugh and a smile.

Emmett was right. The things Bella and I could do now…Well that was definitely something to be happy about.

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"Damn it, Alice! It's my turn." I said exasperated. "Stop texting Jasper so I could text _her_ now."

"Edward, stop it. It's my hour. You know that!" She yelled back.

I groaned and paced my room. "I should just get her, her own phone." I muttered.

"Already ahead of you." Alice appeared at my door with a wide grin. "The phone should arrive with in the next two hours."

"I don't want to wait two hours…"

"Oh well, you'll deal. Keep yourself busy then and get dressed for school."

"What?" I growled. "You can't be serious."

"Well we _do_ have to keep up appearances."

"But the funeral was only a few days ago. They can't expect us to go back so soon."

"What else are we going to do, sit around and mope? The least we could do is go back and help others grieve, right?"

I didn't like it, but Alice was right. She flashed a smile and then rushed to my closet. She opened the door and thumbed through my clothes. Her mind pictured each outfit on me, searching for the 'perfect' one.

I sighed. "Why do you insist on dressing me all the time, Alice?"

"Because with out me you'd dress like an idiot!" She sang. She imagined me as a modern version of Steve Urkel, glasses, suspenders and all.

"I would never need glasses." I laughed.

"Yeah, I know, but it adds to the geek effect. You know you would be a hopeless fashion mess if it weren't for me!" She grimaced. I motioned for her to continue and she turned quickly to the closet again. I had long ago learned not to challenge Alice when it came to fashion and dressing me for "special occasions." I couldn't complain much though, the girl _did_ have style. She put together an outfit for me seconds later. She chose a fitted black sweater and dark blue jeans.

I dressed quickly paying no mind to Alice across the room searching for the right shoes and accessories to match. Then in much less time than I would have hoped for, Alice and I were in my Volvo and on our way to Forks High once again.

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**Don't be too disappointed! I will have the other part of this up by late this evening! =D**

**I hope the phone conversation was alright. It was really hard to write. I wanted to write so much more for it, but the right words just wouldn't all come out...  
**

**Alright, so here's what to expect for next chapter:**

**Lots of school stuff , Edward finds a new friend, a little bit more wolf confrontation and a crazy bitch from the past returns!**

**Leave a review and you get a sneek peek for next chapter!**

**Jan  
**


	8. After School Special

**Ok so part 2 of last chapter. It's quite long, I'm sure you'll love that. ;)**

**I wanted Alice and Edward to get more in touch with there human side, and also to show a little of Edward's past. It's still a bit of a filler chapter, but the end somewhat starts to set up my plot for the story. **

**Alright, so pop some popcorn, get all comfy, and read your hearts out. =D**

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Through the drive, I noticed Alice was practically jumping out of her seat. "What are you so excited about?" I asked. She showed me a vision of Angela and Ben joining us at our lunch table.

"I've always wanted more friends!" She beamed. I sighed.

"Alice we can't get too attached, especially not now. We'll be leaving soon."

"Well we need to live in the moment Edward. I want to make friends with them." Alice pouted. "Besides, we owe it to Bella to take care of some of her best friends." A pang of guilt hit the pit of my stomach, I struggled to push it to the back of my mind. Damn her for using my guilt against me.

"Fine, but you can't be all smiles and bouncing in place at school. Bella's funeral was only a few days ago…It wouldn't set well with everyone if you looked so damn happy after you just buried your best friend, would it?"

"I know that! I'll tone it down once we get to school. I'm the one that's best at playing human, remember!" She grinned. Even though at times she is overbearing, she still plays the part well. She's usually the only one of us, besides Carlisle, to socialize with the humans.

That is until Bella came along.

Bella.

I let my mind wander back to her. I barely remember how I reached the high school. I only realized we had made it there when Alice jabbed me in the ribs with a strong poke.

"Stop day dreaming and come on. We're going to be late if you don't hurry." Alice disguised her eager smile with a small frown. She put on her pair of pink _Dolce_ sun glasses just as I reached over to grab my Oakley's from the glove compartment. I got out of the car and instantly everyone's attention turned towards me.

I took a deep breath and set my sun glasses upon my face. I walked around the car to open the door for Alice and offered her my arm. She hooked her arm in mine and we started our long walk through the parking lot. All eyes followed the two of us. No one spoke a word. But of course I could hear their internal voices.

Some of them pitied us, some could care less. Others gawked at our clothing and grace as we walked. The more I listened the more I wanted the day to be over with. I pushed back the voices in my mind and let them become a soft hum.

When we reached the school grounds, Alice gave me a small hug and smile. _It'll be alright, Edward. The day will go by faster than you think_

"It's already dragging." I mumbled. "I'll see you at lunch." She smiled and walked away with just a small amount of bounce in her step. I sighed and turned left towards my first class, English.

I stepped in just as the bell was ringing.

Mrs. Pollard was at her desk staring at her computer. Before I could walk to my desk, she turned and cleared her throat ready to stop me. "When the bell rings, I expect my students to already be in their seats and ready to start the lesson, Mr. Cullen. You are no exception." I nodded mutely and took one more step before she stopped me again. "You are no exception to the other school rules either. Sunglasses off in my classroom!" _Damn boy thinks he's special just because his little girlfriend died._

I clenched my fists and held back a growl. I held down my anger as best as I could. I had to remind myself that snapping the neck of the only English teacher at Forks High would definitely not be a good idea and go unnoticeable. For Bella, I chanted to myself. I bit the inside of my cheek to hold back a smart ass remark and reached up to take the sun glasses off. I quickly slipped them on to the collar of my sweater. I quietly made my way to the back of the room and into the farthest empty desk.

_Wow, what a bitch._

_Serves Cullen right. _

_Always thinks he could do what he wants._

_Edward's never done anything to her, why is she always picking on him?_

Of course I knew the real reason she holds a grudge with me. I reminded her of someone from her past that she never could get revenge on. The kicker is that I actually _was_ that someone from her past.

It was nearly fifty years ago, a couple of years before Alice and Jasper joined the family, when we had moved to Pittsburgh. Patricia Pollard had gone to the same local high school I attended at the time. She had a major infatuation with we, much like the Jessica of her time. She followed me everywhere, had one sided conversations with me, and of course all those times she begged me to go steady with her. When I was fed up with her useless attempts of seduction, I told her to move on, nothing would ever happen between us because we had nothing in common, that I could never date someone like her. Of course I had meant I could never be with her because she was a human. She was distraught, she thought I was regarding her looks which traumatized her when I unknowingly confronted and embarrassed her in front of nearly the whole school in the parking lot.

I did feel mildly guilty of how I had handled the situation. I should have made sure we were alone. I hadn't meant to embarrass her. But she was really starting to get on my last nerve.

Of course then, the next day I was some sort of hero at the school. Everyone who had fallen victim to her seductions and manipulations cheered and applauded me for 'finally putting her in her place.' After that day I had Carlisle relocate us. We didn't need all the unwanted attention.

It worried me at first when I first realized who she was on our first day at Forks High. She had recognized me as the Edward Masen from Avonworth High. I had panicked and nearly told Carlisle we should move again. But I decided to wait and see if she would tell anyone about recognizing me. But she never did, she had passed it off as just a weird likeness. She does dwell on the past from time to time. Those days are usually like today, when she tries to punish me in any way she can to make herself feel better about what happened to her.

Looking back on it now I'm glad I decided to wait. If I had told Carlisle that I knew Patricia Pollard from the 50's, we would have left Forks and I would have never met Bella.

Bella.

I don't know what my life would have been like with out knowing her.

"Mr. Cullen?" I looked up and quickly searched her mind for the question or the answer, I hadn't been paying any attention to the lesson and she seemed to know that. She smirked and only thought about making me look like a fool in front of everyone. The class turned to look at me, waiting for my answer. I searched their minds as well but came up empty. It didn't seem they were paying much attention either. "Well?"

"Sorry, Mrs. Pollard. I wasn't paying attention." Her smirk grew impossibly larger. _Perfect. That's a zero for him today. Idiot boy, always thinks he knows everything. _

I sat up straighter and folded my hands above my desk. I glanced at the white board and noticed that Romeo and Juliet was still the topic of discussion for this week. "Yes, you see, Romeo and Juliet, is just by far the most ridiculous love story there is. I'd rather not waste my time on such a horrible 'romantic' story."

Her jaw went slack and her eyes nearly fell from their sockets as she glared at me. The class erupted in whispers and some scattered laughs. I knew Romeo and Juliet was one of her favorites as was Bella's. And just like her she was easily offended at my crude interpretation of the tragic, epic couple.

She told the class to be quiet and sat down at her desk once more. Fuming, she sat in silence. The entire class was focused on her and what she would do next. After minutes of silence, the evil smirk came back to her face. I sighed at her thoughts.

"I want a five page essay to be turned in tomorrow on comparing the tragic love story of Romeo and Juliet with a personal tragedy of your own. This will be worth 50% of your final grade, so you better get it done." The class erupted in anger, calling it unfair for her to assign us a paper with such a soon due date. "Well you can thank Mr. Cullen for that." She smiled. Before anyone could turn and glare at me the bell rung and I was already out of my seat and almost out the door. "Oh and Mr. Cullen?" I stood in front of the door waiting for her to continue. "Don't be too worried. You should have _plenty _to write about. Your recent loss would be a _great_ thesis for your paper." Trying to keep myself together, my hand gripped the sunglasses at my neck and I nearly crushed them as I placed them back on my face. I walked out of the room as quickly as I could manage.

I don't know what the hell I was thinking. Why did I let Alice convince me to go to school today? I could have just ditched an extra few days. The townspeople would only think I still needed time to mourn, no one would have been suspicious of my absence.

It was only until I was halfway across the parking lot that I realized where I was going. I needed to leave. I didn't want to be here. Alice would be furious but she'll get over it. I'll just have to buy her the new Prada shoes she wanted for her forgiveness.

I heard light footsteps running towards me. Thinking it was Alice trying to stop me, I quickened my steps.

"Edward, wait!" I stopped in mid step and turned to see Angela running towards me. She was slightly out of breath when she reached me. "Hey." She said shyly as she readjusted her glasses on the bridge of her nose. "She was really out of line back there. I can't believe she did that to you. You should report her to the principal."

"Don't worry about it Angela. I'm just going to go home. You should get back before you're late to your next class." I turned to leave but she reached up to grab my forearm. I looked down at my arm and then at her eyes. She quickly removed her hand and blushed. I smiled slightly, remembering how Bella used to do that all the time. Instantly the smile turned into a grimace. Another thing I would miss severely, I would never get to see Bella blush again.

"You should stay. I know it must be extremely hard for you to be back and all but you can't let Mrs. Pollard run you out of school…You don't want to fall behind do you?" Her thoughts were sincere, she was honestly worried about me and hoped I would get through this. She was even planning on offering me help on my school work if I was to get behind.

"You're right." I sighed. "I shouldn't run away. Come on." I smiled and motioned towards the school. "Let's get back, the bell's about to ring." She smiled back and turned to walk with me back to the school buildings. Alice, watching us with her arms crossed, was sitting at a bench in the courtyard. Angela said her goodbyes and left my side to go to her next class. Alice took that opportunity to yell at me in her mind while she walked over to me. _You idiot! You were going to leave? Seriously Edward, what part of 'we have to keep up appearances' did you not understand?_

"I stayed though, didn't I?" I whispered under my breath. She huffed and stormed away from me. _And you still better buy me those Prada's!_

My next class seemed to go on forever. I spent most of my time thinking of Bella again. Towards the end of the period my phone vibrated in my pocket. It took everything in my power not to reach down to retrieve it. There was only one person it could be and I was very anxious to read the text. The teacher was walking through the isle, observing the students. I didn't want to risk getting caught with my cell phone out and have it taken away. Two long minutes later, Mr. Van Dam walked back to his desk and buried himself into reading his emails. I took my chance and swiftly pulled out my phone.

_It's still really hard to get used to the strength. I was so excited I broke the phone. Hah, luckily Alice sent 3._

You'll get used to it. Don't worry, Love. Miss you…

_I miss you too. How's school going?_

It's much better now that I get to talk to you though.

And of course Alice was right, the day seemed to go much faster after I was able to text Bella. We messaged back and forth all through third and fourth period. Towards the end of my forth class she said she needed to go hunt and that she would call me after she got back and once school was over for me. Before I could say good bye, the teacher called out my name, to which, I quickly hid my phone.

"Mr. Cullen, Mrs. Cope needs to see you in the front office." I searched his mind to see why, but he didn't know. I quickly gathered my belongings and left the room. The office was two buildings over so I decided to surprise Bella with an early call. She picked up after the second ring.

"Aren't you supposed to be in class?" She laughed.

"Well hello to you too." I chuckled. "Was just called out of class so I thought I'd give you a call and wish you a good hunt."

"Yeah, I was just about to leave but I doubled back to grab the phone."

"I'm glad you answered. I do love to hear your voice."

"You too…" she sighed. "As much as I really want to keep talking I really do need to go. I haven't hunted in a few hours…"

"Right. Well go then. I don't want you to be in any pain because of it. Have a mountain lion for me?"

"Will do!" she said excitedly. "I'll talk to you later. Love you."

"Love you too." By the end of our conversation I was at the office entrance. Mrs. Cope's eyes glazed over as I walked in.

_He's only 17! 17…17…17…17! For godssakes woman, you're married. He's only 17! _

"You needed to see me Mrs. Cope?" She blushed and looked down at her desk.

"Er…Um yes, I have your schedule change ready. You're sister dropped off your request this morning and insisted." She handed me a small yellow slip that showed my fifth period class had been changed to advanced independent music studies. I smiled and thanked her. I began my walk to the farthest building where the music room was. I'd have to definitely buy Alice those Prada shoes now.

I hadn't thought much about taking that class because I didn't want my musical abilities to stand out. I hadn't cared to take it before anyways, I only wanted to take as many classes that Bella was in, I didn't want to be apart from her any more than I had to. But now that she's not here, I guess it wouldn't hurt to take the class. It would help me let out stress and be the one class I can count on enjoying myself in.

The class was small, only about five students from what I could see. I took my slip to Mr. Rawlings, the music instructor.

"Ah, Mr. Cullen." He took the slip from me and signed it. "In this class you can pretty much do what ever you like, as long as its music related of course." He handed the slip back to me and stood up from his desk. "I hear you're a pretty good pianist?"

"Yes, Sir. I've played since I was five." I answered honestly. Though he'd never know I've been playing for nearly a hundred and four years now.

"Well, we have a piano in the next room. Feel free to make it your own."

Wordlessly I went into the other room. The room was empty except for a black piano in one corner and a few chairs and music stands scattered about. I set my books down on the chair closest to me and made my way to the piano.

I tested out a few keys and adjusted the tuning. At first I played a few scales, then small bits of some classical pieces. Ten minutes in I found myself playing Bella's lullaby. I closed my eyes and let the notes fill my mind.

So lost in the music, I hadn't noticed I had an audience until I played the last note. I spun around in the seat as she walked closer.

"That was beautiful, Edward." Angela stopped in front of me with a gentle smile. "I've never heard anything like it. Did you compose it?" I only nodded my answer. "May I?" She pointed at the bench I sat on. I was about to stand and give her the entire seat but she sat down beside me with ease.

I was surprise at how comfortable she felt around me. Other than Bella, humans didn't necessarily feel at ease around us. Humans didn't know what I was, but they still veered away from me on instinct. But somehow Angela was different. She was so much like Bella, now that I think of it. She noticed the differences in my family and I, but never dwelled much on it.

She placed her hands on the keys and played. She was a bit off timing but still played the piece wonderfully. I smiled as I saw her mind think back of how her mother taught her to play as a child, and now how she teaches her two younger brothers.

"You're very good." I complimented.

"Thank you." She continued to play. As the notes played out faint memories passed through my mind.

I could remember my own mother doing the same when I was a child, teaching me which notes went well together and the right notes to each scale. She taught me everything from arpeggios to vibrato. Those were some of the few good memories I have left of her.

It's strange what I can and can't remember of my human life sometimes. You would think I would remember more of my last couple of years as a human than of my childhood, but that wasn't the case. The only memories I have of those years was of a conversation I had with my parents about wanting to join the army.

They weren't please with me. My father wanted me to be a lawyer like him, and take over the family law firm. My mother wanted me to marry and start a family as soon as possible, she wanted grandchildren.

The others were of brief flashes of my last couple of days in the hospital with the Spanish Influenza lying next to my mother. Her weak frame moved slowly as she struggled to tend to me. Carlisle later showed me through his own memories of a few times he had come across my family before the outbreak of the flu.

My mother had been in the market just after sundown, he had offered to walk her home, not wanting her to be walking the streets alone at night. After he saw to leaving her safely at home he was thanked by my father. Before he left the house he had noticed me looking out the window at him and waved back at me. That was the first time he had ever seen me. I couldn't remember that night, but I was thankful for him keeping her safe. Carlisle later revealed that he had saved my mother from being robbed, and maybe even more, that night. Three men had been waiting for her around the corner where she was at the market. He saw to it that she wouldn't be harmed.

Along with the good memories I received from him, I was also unfortunate enough to come across the memories of my mother and father that I could have done without. My gift of mind reading had begun half-way through my change, so while Carlisle berated himself with guilt over changing me, he thought of my mother. So there I was burning and completely caught off guard with the memories of my mother dying in Carlisle's presence. It wasn't his fault. He hadn't known I could hear. But still those memories haunted me to this day.

"I hope I'm not intruding." Angela said softly, her notes became feather light.

"Huh?" Snapping back to reality, I turned to her. "Oh, no, it's ok. It's nice to hear someone other than myself playing for once. You're really good."

"Not as good as you though." She said under her breath and stopped playing altogether now. Before I could tell her she shouldn't think that way she spoke up, catching me by surprise. "That song you played, it was for Bella wasn't it?"

I flinched as she said her name out loud. Angela scolded herself mentally for saying her name. _Maybe it's too soon to talk about her…_ She turned back to the piano and played a small part of Für Elise. I smiled and began to play along with her.

"Yes. I wrote it for Bella a few months ago." She stopped playing again and set her hands in her lap.

"Would you like to play it again? I think I only got to hear half of it." _Darn. I shouldn't have asked. What if it's too personal? Maybe I wasn't even supposed to hear any of it…It was beautiful though…_

"I –" The class bell cut my sentence short. Angela stood up as did I.

"Well I guess I'll see ya around." She said awkwardly.

"Of course." I walked to the chair and picked up the books I set upon it earlier. When I turned around, I was going to ask her if she wanted to join Alice and me for lunch, but she was already gone.

I met Alice halfway to the lunch room. The cafeteria was unusually quiet. It seems that I wasn't the only one with Bella on my mind all day. We went through the line and bought a few random things that we wouldn't eat and then made our way to our table. The table felt much larger than it did before. The table was meant for six, yet only two of us sat here today. I looked down at the empty seat beside me where Bella should have been sitting at. I longed to see her there again.

I nearly dropped my tray from the table when Alice shoved my arm roughly and stepped on my foot.

"Damn it, Alice! What is your problem?" I hissed.

"You're doing it again." She glared at me. I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. Damn pixie. I moved my foot out of the way a second before she tried to step on it again. "Don't call me that." Her gaze shifted and her eyes glazed over for a moment. She smiled and pointed across the room.

I groaned and buried my face in my hands. Of all people why the hell did it have to be–

"Mike! Hi." Alice greeted a bit too chipper.

"Um hey, Alice. Edward." Without raising my face from my hands I acknowledge him with a wave of the back of my hand.

A brief image of Bella holding hands with me flashed through his mind, which was quickly replaced with an image of him and Bella doing the same. A growl built up in my chest, too low for him to hear. Distracted, I hadn't moved my foot fast enough. Alice painfully stepped on my foot again. I groaned and looked up. "I swear you better stop Alice or I'm going to rip your foot off." I hissed too low for Mike to hear.

_Hah, you can try!_

"So I came by to see how you were. You seemed a bit lonely today Alice. I wanted to make sure you were holding up alright." The image of Bella and him holding hands was replaced again with one of him and Alice. _Well now since that Hale guy is gone…and Bella's…gone… just maybe I'll get lucky for once._

"What the…" I wanted to punch the hell out of him. Was he serious? Already he's thinking of _Alice_? Already wanting to _try_ to take advantage of her? Who the hell did this guy think he was? "You…"

"Hey guys." Mike was pushed out of the way and Ben took his place holding two lunch trays. Following beside him was Angela. "Mind if we join you today?"

Mike forgotten, I motioned the two empty chairs in front of us. "Of course not, go ahead." They took their seats and to my dismay, Mike followed suit by taking the chair to Alice's immediate right. I grimaced and made plans to slice holes in the tires of his car before I left today.

_That'll go well._ Alice mentally laughed as she saw a frustrated Mike, trying to change out his tires in the heavy rain.

Lunch was much better than I thought it would be. Ben was a pretty cool guy. And Angela was well into befriending Alice. Alice was ecstatic, already planning a shopping date with her for next weekend. Although she wished she could have Bella be there too, she knew it would be good for Angela to get out a little more.

The rest of the day seemed to drag a little longer since I was anticipating Bella's call after school. Sixth period, I partnered with Ben, and my last period was with Alice so it wasn't too bad. When the final bell rang I took a shortcut through the forest behind the school and came back out to right in front of the parking lot. There was no one out yet, so I made good on my plan with dicing up Newton's tires. I then waited for Alice to meet me out by the Volvo.

She walked up to the car with Angela and Ben in tow. She exchanged numbers with Angela and then said good bye.

Once in the car, Alice was once again her bouncy self. She quickly picked up her phone and flipped it open. "Hey Jazzy! Guess what? Angela and I are friends now…yep! We're going shopping next weekend too."

I pulled out of the parking and started to drive out of the lot. We passed by Newton's car on the way out and laughed when he kicked the rim of his tire in anger and let out a wail of pain.

Maybe school won't be so bad after all.

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I still missed Bella like crazy, each day it got worse and worse. The phone calls that were meant to keep us connected were only driving me insane and only made my want to see her even more. I needed to be with her. I wanted nothing more than to be by her side again. It had been two months since her change and I still hadn't been able to properly see her, be with her. I was going mad. And today was no different.

I was routinely waiting for Bella to give me a call back after her hunt when it happened.

_There was a rush of wind and light footfalls deep through the forest just as the sun was rising. Her sick devious smile pulled on her face as she came into view through the clearing. She picked a twig out of her hair and walked up to the house. "Come out, come out where ever you are."_

"What the hell." I rushed downstairs and stood beside Alice. "When?"

"Tomorrow morning. We have to tell Carlisle." She whispered. The look in her eyes nearly broke me. There was only one other time I had seen that expression and I wish I never had to see them again. She was worried. Alice never worried. I quickly dialed Carlisle's number and told him to come home as quick as possible. He was home with in the next fifteen minutes.

"What's wrong, son?" He asked as he walked through the door. Alice and I were waiting for him in the living room.

"Alice had a vision." He took off his coat and sat with us in the living room.

"What did you see?" _Is everything alright? Where's Esme? The others? Are they.._

"They're fine Carlisle. They're still out hunting for the weekend they'll be back on Monday." I answered him. He nodded and turned back to Alice. She was staring at the floor with her knees tucked underneath her chin.

"Alice, sweetie, what did you see?" He asked her again. She turned to him with glazed eyes.

"Maria."

Carlisle's mind raced with possibilities. _Why? Why now? _

"We don't know, the only thing Alice can see is that she's coming, but we don't see _why_."

"Well isn't it obvious?" Alice hissed. "She's come back for him. She wants to take him away from me…"

Carlisle took her in his arms to calm her down. "Everything will be ok, don't worry. Jasper loves you, he would never go back to her, you know that."

"_I_ know that. But she just won't give up!"

_When?_

"Sometime around dawn."

_We'll have to warn the wolves._

I nodded in agreement. He kissed the top of her head and stood up retrieving the phone from his pocket.

"Maybe they'll come across her and tear her apart before she even gets here." I suggested. Alice smirked. Carlisle gave me a pointed look.

"Well at least they'd be doing something useful instead of following us around everywhere we go." I mumbled.

"Hey Sam, it's Carlisle Cullen. I'm sorry for calling so late but it's urgent. I hope I didn't wake you."

"It's my shift to patrol so I was already awake. What's so urgent?"

"There's a bit of a situation you need to know about."

"And that is?"

"My daughter Alice has had a vision of another vampire coming into town within the next few hours and she doesn't share our diet."

"Is she some friend of yours?"

"Hardly. No, we wouldn't call her a friend."

"Will she be taking part of the treaty while here?"

"See that's the thing, we don't know what she wants or what she will do. She's not really welcome here to begin with."

"I see. Will she be alone?"

Carlisle looked towards me for the answer. "We only saw her in the vision. But that doesn't necessarily mean she's alone. She probably isn't." I said loud enough for Sam to hear.

"I'll have the rest of the pack on the look out. If she comes anywhere near La Push we'll be ready for her. You keep your part of the treaty as well. She better not harm anyone in Forks because of you." Sam hung up the phone abruptly. Carlisle's brows furrowed.

_Could have at least been a little more polite…_

"_Dogs." _I hissed under my breath.

**

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**

At about 5am we heard the sounds of fast footfalls in the forest. Alice blurred over to me and Carlisle did the same. Seconds later she was in front of our home. I pulled back the curtain and saw Maria pulling the twig from her hair.

"Come out, come out where ever you are." She sang with a thick Spanish accent. She walked towards the door at human pace. Carlisle opened the door before she had the chance to knock it down.

"Ah! Carlisle, qué beuno. I'm glad someone's home." With out waiting for someone to invite her in, she blurred into the living room and dropped herself on the loveseat, sitting with her feet over the armrest. She was barefoot, and only wore a simple white gown. She was about Alice's height with shoulder length brown hair. Although she was a complete monster, I couldn't deny that she still did look beautiful. Her eyes were a dull red, indicating she hadn't fed recently, which was good, for now. She sniffed the air loudly. _Faint. _"Where are the others?" She demanded.

"They're out hunting." Carlisle answered. It was best to be honest with her. She always could tell if someone were lying to her.

"Ay, yes. But still hunting the animals I see." She grimaced as she imagined Carlisle bending over a rabbit.

"We drink from much larger game then _that_ Maria." I hissed. She rolled her eyes and blurred over to the other side of the room to riffle through the DVDs in our case.

"Sí, pero animales! You of all people should know that humans are much more…_sabroso_." She licked her lips and turned on the spot. "So when's la _familia_ coming back?"

"Not until Monday." Carlisle answered.

"And Jasper?" Maria asked with a devious smile. No one answered her. "I asked a question." Her eyes narrowed as she moved closer to us. "I can tell by his faint scent that he hasn't been around for months. I take it he must have _slipped_ and ran out on you all. Or probably left this one once in for all." She motioned to Alice and glared. "Dónde está?"

I reached out towards Alice and held her by the forearm as she took a step forward. "What makes you think we'd tell you?" She hissed. "In Calgary we told you to keep your distance, and stay away from our family. Jasper wants nothing to do with you anymore."

Maria growled and sprang at Alice. On instinct, I pushed Alice quickly behind me and just as Maria was about to collide with her, I pushed against her shoulders and sent her flying backwards. Maria landed gracefully back on her feet across the room. She mumbled under her breath about how mind reading could be useful. She let out a chilling child-like laugh that echoed throughout the still room. I held back a shudder. She smiled and walked back over to the loveseat.

"I could make you tell me." She smirked and sat back down calmly.

Beside me Alice gasped at the force of her vision. She lost her balance and I caught her in my arms.

_Maria stood over a small boy no older than five. She let the small body fall lifeless to the floor and wiped off the drops of blood off her lips. She laughed and walked away from the body and moved to a bed across the room. She lowered herself and pulled up the sheets. Another boy, his twin, was underneath hiding away from her. "It's ok bebe, you can trust me." She smiled and reached out to him. The little boy shook in fear but took her hand anyways. Maria growled and pulled the boy out roughly from underneath and swiftly took his neck into her mouth. The boy cried out in pain, causing the rest of the house to wake up. Behind Maria the room's door opened. She dropped the second child to the ground and grinned as she turned to find her next victim. "You're next." She screamed and tried to run, but Maria caught her by the hair, pulling her back close to her chest. Her glasses fell to the ground from the force and she shut her eyes tight as she began to whisper a prayer. Maria exposed her neck and sniffed along her collarbone. "You smell delicious." _

Angela's ear piercing scream echoed throughout the room as the vision ended.

"NO!" Alice growled.

"Then tell me where he is." Maria ordered.

Alice was torn. She didn't want Maria anywhere near Jasper but she couldn't let Angela and her family meet that fate. She would tell her he was in Denali.

"No…" I gasped.

Bella.

I didn't want Maria anywhere near her!

_Edward…we have to…she'll kill…_

"No." I hissed.

I couldn't allow it. Maria was too dangerous.

Another vision hit Alice at full force. Maria was planning on picking off humans one by one until we told her where Jasper was. Some of her victims included more children and one being Charlie when he tries to stop her by shooting her.

Alice started to shake violently. I gripped onto her tighter. We were both in the same predicament. If we told her where he was, we would both put our mates in danger. But if we didn't…we'd be condemning death to countless humans, and putting our own lives at risk with the wolves for not protecting them.

It was a lose-lose situation.

"So what will it be, chicka? I don't have all day." Maria said flatly while carelessly examined her nails.

_I'm sorry, Edward._

I growled and turned away from her. I knew what I had to do then.

"On one condition." Alice whispered.

"Depende." Maria narrowed her eyes in suspicion.

"There's a small village from here that a pack of werewolves protect. They know you're here and they're not happy."

"Yes, I noticed." Maria growled. "I had to shake them off before I got here."

"I will tell you where Jasper is, but you have to make sure you're not tracked by them when you leave."

_Interesting. They're hiding something. I wonder…_ "Deal."

Alice searched her future to make sure she would keep her word. Maria would head south a few hundred miles back before turning back north for Alaska. Defeated, she nodded and bent over one of the end tables to write down the address of our Denali home in Alaska. She cautiously walked towards Maria and held up the tiny slip of paper to her. With a wide grin Maria snatched the paper away from her and made her way to the door.

"In the end, I always get what I want." She smirked. She turned to Alice and licked her lips. "Jasper is mine, always has and always will be. I only let you borrow him. But I've come back now to collect what's mine." Her wicked laugh carried out through the clearing as she blurred out of sight through the tree line.

Alice crumbled to the floor. Carlisle rushed to her side. She curled herself onto him and let out a heart wrenching sob.

I couldn't just sit back and do nothing.

I ran.

I couldn't let her get there before me. I headed straight north. I ignored the buzzing of my phone and kept running. I pushed myself harder than I ever had before and passed Seattle in record time. It was there on the outskirts of Seattle where I stopped dead in my tracks.

_Where the hell is he going?_

_They never venture out this far by themselves…_

I growled, furious. I picked up a boulder and threw it at a tree, effectively snapping the tree in half. I reached into my pocket and looked at the most recent text Alice had left me.

_I can't see you anymore, they must have followed you. Please come back Edward. Bella will be fine. _

I clenched my fists at my sides. I couldn't believe this was happening. How was I supposed to protect Bella like this? If I ran to protect her from Maria, the wolves would find and attack us. If I went back, I'd leave her to fend for herself against Maria.

I hated this. I felt so helpless. My overwhelming need to protect Bella was eating me up inside. But I could only protect her from one or the other.

Frustrated, I punched the forest floor as I let myself fall to the ground. Only when I could smell the potent stench of dog in the air did I get up. Two wolves, Paul and Embry, entered the small clearing moments later.

_Why have you come so far from Forks? You never come this far…_

"I needed some fresh air." I said between clenched teeth. "I needed to get away for awhile."

_Fresh air my ass. _

_Explain yourself._

"I don't have to explain myself to anyone. But if you must know, I just needed some time alone for myself. But I obviously can't even do that with you two following me around all the damn time."

_We're under strict orders to keep an eye on you all. We don't trust you leeches._

A growl built up deep in my chest. "Well could you at least _try_ and be less obvious about tailing me?"

_We'll do whatever is necessary to make sure our people are safe._

My phone buzzed again and I quickly looked at it.

_Please come home. Please. She'll be alright. She's not after Bella…_

I sighed and turned back to the wolves.

"When will you just back off?" I hissed. "Haven't we already proved enough that we have nothing to hide?"

_Like we've said before… _

_We don't trust you leeches._

They were right not to trust us. We were lying to them after all.

After a few moments of silent deliberating, I turned on the spot and started running again, only this time I was running back to Forks.

* * *

**OK. So that was another difficult chapter to write. Hopefully the next one won't be too hard. **

**Hope you guys enjoyed it.**

**I haven't started writing the next chapter so I don't have a sneak peek yet. But as soon as I have something, I'll send it if you're one of my reviewers. =P**

**Thanks for reading!**

**Until next time,**

**Jan**


	9. Maria, Maria

(Updated Chapter 9 05/01/11)

**0I know, don't hate me! I know it's been forever…**

**I was finally able to get this done and uploaded and I hope it was worth the wait. **

**Before you go on and start reading, please take a chance afterwards and visit this awesome author and read her Fic "Siren Blood" Its Twi-fic genius. It's such an original concept and has an amazing storyline. You'll enjoy her Edward, along with her own Bella (with an actual personality) that is written very well. Check it out:**

**http:/www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/4227585/1/Siren_Blood**

**And without further commentary that I know you don't want to read, here's the long awaited chapter (nearly 6 months now – I know I'm a losah!) of Domino Effect:.**

* * *

It had been nearly two months since Bella's transformation. The Denali's would be visiting very soon and I was slightly unnerved. I knew I had to face Laurent again. He had resided with the Denali coven only a few days after the James affair. The Denali's welcomed him with arms wide open, especially Irina. From what I've heard, they seemed to have mated.

When Carmen had called the day of our arrival, she insisted on helping me with Bella. She wanted to come and stay at the house with us so she could help me tend to Bella's hunting needs and make sure she wouldn't run off. She knows I have a great deal of experience with newborns, so I couldn't understand why she was so worried about it. Had Laurent told them? That was the real reason I had to _stall_, for lack of a better word. I was terrified of what he might have already said, of what everyone would think once they found out that…

"Jasper?"

"In the library."

Bella blurred into the room and sat with me on the leather couch. She tucked her legs beneath her and proceeded to look over my shoulder. I could feel her light breathing against my shoulder and the amusement flowing freely from her.

"What's so funny?" I asked, turning towards her.

"Not really funny it's just…_interesting_." She said gesturing to the book in my hand.

"And what, pray-tell, is so interesting about my reading material?" I asked with a fake glare.

"I never took you for a romance reader." She laughed.

"Yes, I quite like Shakespeare. Every once in a while I pull out his greatest works and reread them."

"But isn't it a bit redundant? Vampire memories are crystal clear. Wouldn't rereading them be boring when you already know the story word for word?"

"Not exactly. Yes, I do know the text word for word, but it's much like watching a movie or reading your favorite book over and over again. It's all about the feelings you get when you think about the story. Just because you know how the story goes, doesn't stop you from looking at it again, especially if you enjoy it."

She nodded in understanding. She handed the book back to me and suddenly twirled herself upside down. Her legs hung over the back of the couch and her head hung over the seat. She let her arms fall back and she traced the swirls of the hard wood floors. Amused at her randomness, I mimicked her position. I folded my hands on my chest and grinned goofily at her. She giggled and tumbled backwards, landing on her feet in front of me.

"Silly Jasper!" she sang. I laughed as I spun back around and sat normally again.

"Oh I'm the silly one?"

"Yep!" she jumped at me but I moved out of the way just in time. She hit the couch with enough force that it caused it to fall backwards and bring us both to the ground along with it. We both laughed as we stood up together. She brushed the dust from her jeans as I lifted the couch back into place.

"Bored I take it?"

"Yeah. I've got the next five hours free. Edward's got classes and Alice won't let him text me!" she pouted. She sighed and picked up my copy of Romeo and Julliet, which now lay on the floor, and gave it to me again. "She says he's been texting me so much during classes that people are starting to notice a difference in him."

"Well they do have to keep up appearances…"

"You sound like Alice!" She huffed and walked over to the wall of books closest to her. She was quiet for a few moments as she read through all the titles on the binding of the books. She would pull out random ones and look at them confused.

Sadness flickered through her and she sat back at the couch. She grabbed _Romeo and Julliet _once more from on top of the table and set the book down on her lap. A strong wave of love and intrigue passed through her, and then the sadness crept back again. She lightly touched the book and let her index finger trace the words on the page. '_Come, gentle night, - come, loving black brow'd night, give me my Romeo; and when he shall die, take him and cut him out in little stars, and he will make the face of Heaven so fine that all the world will be in love with night, and pay no worship to the garish sun'._

"What's wrong, Bella?" I asked. I reached over and pulled her hair out of her face. Her hand reached up to her face, her fingers lightly traced the circles underneath her eyes.

"I can't cry…" She turned to look at me with sad crimson eyes. Her brows furrowed. "I can't even remember how it feels to cry." She was disappointed and disoriented. "I don't know if that's a good or bad thing." She sighed and looked back down at her lap and flipped through the pages again. "The story is fuzzy in my memory. Some of these books… It's hard to remember most of them. It feels like I have read them but as much as I try to remember what they're about, I can't. It's very frustrating. " She sighed.

"It's not so bad. It can be frustrating at times, but you'll get used to it eventually. It's ok. It's happened to all of us. There are many things I still can't remember. It'll get easier." She nodded slightly. I made a bold move and took her in my arms. She was surprised to say the least, but comforted none the less. She held me tight and let out a deep sigh. In that moment I just knew, she would get through this just fine.

The last couple of months alone with her had brought us closer together. She trusted me much more now. She was more in control of her emotions than any newborn I've come across, but still her emotions would run wild at times. My gift has definitely come in handy when she would go into one of her fits. On her second day of waking up, she had nearly ripped my arm from my shoulder when I moved too quickly to reach for my phone. To be honest, I was surprised she hadn't actually hurt me yet. I t wasn't her fault she lash out at me though. I understood perfectly how her instincts could take over. It wasn't her fault and I tried to explain that to her. I tried to comfort her but she wouldn't let me come near her for some time. She feared that she would hurt me if I had gotten any closer than need be. So I sat across the room and just watched her as she wept. I tried numerous times to help her through her overwhelming emotions but she was quite stubborn. It was hours later that I was able to convince her to get out of the room. It was only thanks to her rising thirst that she finally agreed to go hunt. I had her hunt for hours. I knew hunting would be the only thing to keep her mind off of what had happened. After a few weeks she began to trust me and didn't flinch away from me when I came close. The only thing bothering my mind now is how she would react when everything is revealed to her. The trust that we'd built these past few months would be shattered. I only had myself to blame.

She tried to give me back the book but I shook my head. "You keep it. Read it so you can refresh your memory." She nodded mutely and quietly began to read through the book. I sat back and watched her read. After a few minutes I could see her furrowing her brows and continue to be frustrated at the writing. Trying to lighten the mood I sent her some playfulness and I swiftly jumped over the coffee table. I cleared my throat and in my best impression of Old English, I bellowed, "As yonder lady o'er her fellows shows." She smiled and looked up at me amusingly. "The measure done, I'll watch her place of stand, and, touching hers, make blessèd my rude hand. Did my heart love till now? Forswear it, sight! For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night."

"Bravo! Bravo!" Bella laughed and applauded. I took a dramatic bow. "Although it's kind of funny hearing Romeo speak with a slight southern twang."

"Southern twang?" I scowled.

"Yep." She laughed. "I like it though." I walked back over to the coach and she set the book down on the table.

"I thought my accent had faded by now…" I smirked.

"Well like I said, it was only slight. But it comes out every now and then when you talk." She smiled. I took the book once more and opened it to set it on Bella's lap.

The sound of an engine driving up the road to the house caught our attention and we both whipped our heads in the direction of the sound. Bella got very nervous and my own nerves weren't helping the situation.

I got up and slowly walked up the door. When I opened it, a tiny brown hair vampire jumped up and wrapped her arms around me.

"Jasper! It's been so long!"

I was startled but feeling her happiness made me wrap my own arms around her.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"It's been too long Jazz, I got impatient. I had to come see you." She grinned.

Bella stirred and slowly made her way over to the door.

"Oh! You must be Edward's mate Bella." She grinned. She walked over to Bella and gave her a hug. Bella stiffened at the sudden touch of an unknown vampire. Her instincts screamed at her to attack and recoil at the touch. I drowned her in trust and she instantly relaxed. "Oops… I forgot, sorry." She held out her hand to Bella and Bella took it shyly. "I'm Kate Denali."

"Oh… I didn't know you were…" Bella turned to glare at me. "Jasper didn't tell me we were going to have company any time soon."

"Don't get mad at him though, I came today because I couldn't wait to meet you anymore." She grinned. "Tanya'll be here soon too. She's angry at you Jasper, so watch out." Kate giggled.

"Angry at _me_, why?" I grinned knowingly.

"_Jasper Whitlock, you know very well why I'm angry at you!" _The faint screaming voice of Tanya echoed through the wooded area behind the house. A split second later she blurred in through the open front door tackling me down to the ground. Of course I let her do that, I could have easily moved out of the way. But I knew Tanya wouldn't really ever hurt me.

_Smack!_

Ok, maybe she would. I flipped her over and pinned her to the ground. "Hello to you too Tanya." I laughed. I bent over to kiss her on the cheek and her face broke out into a smile.

"That is totally not fair Jasper! You can't use your gift to make me forget about being angry!"

"I did no such thing, that smile was genuine." I grinned.

She blurred away from underneath me and held her chin up high with her arms crossed. "I'm still angry. I'll never forgive you for what you did to Sammy."

I got to my knees and starred at her for a moment or two. She was on the brink of rushing to tackle me again. The last time Emmett and I had come up to visit, our wrestling match had turned 'Sammy,' her '61 250 GT California Spyder, into a pile of crumpled metal. I had thrown Emmett towards it with so much force, that the car was smashed and bent at such odd angles that it was unrecognizable after Emmett stood up off of it. I felt really bad afterward, that wasn't a car you came by fairly easily. She couldn't be mad at me forever though, eternity was a long time. And then genius struck. I went to her in a split second and began to tickle her like a maniac. Of course vampires are not ticklish, but with my special abilities I could make any vampire double over in laugher just like any human would. Tanya's giggles were loud and her body tumbled to the ground again. Bella watched in intrigue and confusion, Kate was laughing her ass off.

"Ok! Ok! I give! I give!" Tanya laughed. I stopped immediately and lay on my side with my arm holding up my head. Tanya mirrored me.

"I'll get you a new one." I said. Her eyes lit up like a five year old with candy. She pushed me back to the ground and smothered me in a hug.

"I want it candy apple red!" she said joyfully. I laughed and pulled us both back up off the ground.

Bella was nervous again, she wouldn't make contact with anyone's eyes. At last she looked over at Tanya. Tanya was brushing off her jeans and fixing her curly strawberry blonde hair out of her face. Bella's insecurities struck me like a knife. At first I didn't understand why, but then her jealousy clued me in. She was insecure towards Tanya. I knew that someone must have told her about Tanya's interest in Edward.

"Hi Bella, I'm Tanya." She held out her hand and Bella flinched back. Tanya frowned in disappointment. She was confused. She was probably wondering if Bella was either scared of her or if she hated her for wanting Edward. She put another bright smile on her face and held up her hand again for Bella to take. "I don't bite." She grinned. Bella wearily took her hand and shook it. After Bella's hello, Tanya walked towards the living room after Kate to leave me a moment alone with Bella.

Bella bit her lip and looked away from me. I held her close to me and whispered in her ear. _"It'll be ok. They're harmless."_ I patted her hair down in the back. _"And don't worry about Tanya, she a doll."_ I could feel Bella's face pull into a smile and nodded. I took her hand and together we walked out in to the living room. Tanya and Kate turned to look at us from their seats on the couch. Bella and I went to sit in the couch opposite of them.

"Will the others be joining us?" I asked.

"Nah, it's just me and Tanya. Carmen and Eleazar are out of town until next week. Irina is out hunting with Laurent."

A feral growl resonated throughout the room. The leather on the couch ripped and screeched underneath Bella's fingers. Surprised, Tanya and Kate took in Bella's appearance. She was wide-eyed and ready to pounce on any sudden movement. The tension in the room was so thick; I could cut it with a knife. I slowly took Bella's hand in mine and soothed her. When she calmed down I explained that Laurent was no threat to her. "Do you remember? He helped us that day. He told us about James." Bella took a deep breath and nodded.

"Sorry." She whispered.

"He's part of our coven now." Tanya stated.

"I had figured as much." I answered honestly.

"The guy's a douche."

"Kate!" Tanya hissed.

"What? He is. Irina has the worst taste in guys."

Tanya shook her head. "Oh Kate, you're just jealous because she's the first of us three to mate."

Kate grimaced. "I guess you're right." She sighed. "I swear, what is with guys nowadays? No more chivalry left in the world. All the good ones are already taken!" She smirked. "Oh well, at least most are nice to look at."

Bella stifled a giggle. Kate was glad Bella wasn't so tense anymore.

The day went by fairly quick after that. Bella was able to get rid of her nerves and conversed with Kate freely. Tanya was more inclined to talk to me. She was nervous about talking to Bella. Tanya was hardly ever nervous. Kate now sat by Bella and me by Tanya. Kate was talking Bella's ear off and Bella was just happy to have someone else to talk to. I leaned towards Tanya and whispered in her ear, _"What's got you so wound up?"_

"_I think I should talk to Bella about Edward."_

I nodded. She was determined to talk to her but was extremely nervous. I sent a wave of confidence to her and she smiled. She nudged my side and stood up. "Bella, could I have a word with you in private?" She asked.

Bella looked at me, silently asking me if it was ok. I smiled and nodded encouragingly. She stood up and wearily walked behind Tanya out the front door. Kate blurred to my side. "Tanya's wants to clear the air between her and Bella. She doesn't want her to think that she's pinning after Edward anymore."

"You think she won't?" I asked unsure. Tanya was infatuated with Edward. I couldn't imagine her just backing off and leaving him alone, regardless if Bella was in the picture.

"Yes, I know she won't." Kate said confidently. "Remember when Edward came up after Bella's first arrival in Forks?" I nodded. "Well, apparently she had a long talk with Edward one night. She knew from then on that he would never be hers. She could tell his heart was already lost to her. Bella changed something in Edward even then. He didn't even know her that well, but we could all see it. She knew from then on they would be nothing more than friends. And she wants to reassure Bella that she won't advance on him."

"That's very noble of her. I know how much she truly does love and care about my brother."

Kate nodded. "Enough to let him go and be with his true mate."

"They'll probably be a while, what shall we do until they get back?" I asked.

She smirked. "Chess?"

An hour later both girls came back into the house laughing. Kate and I smiled at each other and went back to our chess game.

"Which game is this?" Tanya asked.

"84." We both said.

Tanya rolled her eyes.

"84 games?" Bella asked with eyebrows raised. "Holy shit, that's a lot."

"Yeah, they get really into it." Tanya said. "Kate we have to get going soon."

"Yeah, yeah I know." Kate blurred her queen to H4. "Checkmate!"

"Damn!" I laughed. Kate had won the 43rd game, winning over all. Kate and I are very evenly matched, which is why we love playing together. "Good game."

"You guys should come over next weekend when everyone's home." Tanya said.

"Only if it's ok with Bella." I said. Bella smiled and nodded. "Then I guess that means we will."

"Sweet!" Kate cheered. She hugged Bella and then kissed my cheek before walking out the door. Tanya followed suit.

When Kate's car couldn't be heard anymore Bella spoke. "They're lovely."

"Wait until you meet the rest of them. You'll especially like Carmen. So much like Esme."

Bella smiled and excused herself for the night. It was moments after I heard her turn the water on in her bath that I got the phone call.

"Hey sugar." I said with a smile.

"Jazzy…" I was immediately on alert. My girl sounded so heartbroken.

"Alice what's wrong?" A million scenarios rushed through my mind.

"It's her Jazz…She's back."

"Who's back?" I asked anxiously.

"Maria." She sniffed.

"Fuck." Of all the scenarios, this was the worst. "Did she hurt you? Jesus, Alice if she touched you I'll rip her throat out and –"

"No she didn't hurt me, or anyone else. She would have if…" Alice broke off into a sob. I could hear Carlisle in the background stifling her tears.

"If what?" I asked impatiently. "Alice darlin', talk to me? What happened?" The phone was muffled and was taken by someone else.

"Jasper."

"Carlisle what's going on?"

"Maria threatened to kill the neighboring humans if we wouldn't tell her where you were."

"Oh hell." I fell to the couch and held my head in my hands. "Damn it, Carlisle, you told her?"

"Of course we did, Jasper. You don't expect us to let Maria slaughter the townspeople of Forks and possibly ending with the slaying of your wife in the crossfire."

"No of course not Carlisle, it's just well, damn it." Frustrated, I punched the coffee table. I could feel Bella upstairs start to get worried and debating weather to come down or not. I sighed. "Does Alice know when she'll be here?" The phone wan taken from Carlisle and my girl spoke again.

"Within the next three hours." She sniffed. "I'm sorry Jasper."

"Sweetheart, you have nothing to be sorry for. You couldn't have avoided this. It was bound to happen one day. We knew she would never give up so easily."

"I know but I was hoping it wouldn't be quite this soon…"

"Quite the worst moment she could have picked too. How's Edward handling all this?" At the sound of Edward's name, Bella made herself known and walked into the living room with water beads falling from her hair.

"Is everything ok, Jasper?" she asked.

"Edward's being Edward of course. He freaked out and starting running up there. The wolves chased after him but when he realized they were, he doubled back. He should be home soon."

"God he's never going to forgive me for this…" I let out a deep breath.

Bella came to sit beside me and looked at me pointedly. She was out of the loop and was irritated that I hadn't said anything to her yet. I held up one finger, motioning for her to give me a moment. She growled.

"I can't see what she wants, Jasper. Call me as soon as she leaves…or as soon as you can."

"Alice you have nothing to worry about. I love you. Keep me updated if anything does come up."

"Love you, too." My angel said with such pain in her voice. She hung up and I wanted so bad to throw the phone into the wall. I hated to hear her that way. Damn Maria to hell.

"Spill, Jasper!" Bella growled. "What is going on?"

"Maria is on her way here."

She furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "But why?"

"Why do you think?" I asked sarcastically. "She's coming for me. She wants me back."

"You're not going with her though are you? You're not leaving…"

"Of course not, I'll just have to figure something out. Last time it was easy enough, but now she's back. I can't understand why she won't just let me go already. Why can't she understand I don't want her… that I'm with Alice."

"I don't understand. It's been years; why would she want you back now? I didn't think she still had her army. She obviously hadn't needed you before, why now?" She asked confused.

"It's a long story…"

"How long before she gets here?" she questioned.

"Three hours."

"Then tell me the rest of the story, there's obviously much more behind this Maria thing…"

I sighed and let myself fall back on the couch. "Remember how you asked me the day you woke up of why Maria hadn't killed me after my newborn years?" She nodded. "Bella, I wasn't only just a soldier in her army, I was also her lover."

"You…Oh!" Bella's eyes widened. "But Jasper, what about Alice?"

"It was before Alice came into my life, Bella. Before I met Alice my life was a crazy mess, all thanks to Maria and her little games."

"Did you love her? Maria, I mean."

"At the time I suppose I did. Looking back on it now, I'm not sure what it was. Even with being an Empath my feelings for her still confuse me to no end."

"So she's coming back because she wants you back as a lover then?"

"Honestly? I have no idea what she wants. It's quite possible though."

"Can't you just tell her to leave you alone? You married Alice, shouldn't that be enough proof that you have moved on?"

I laughed without a hint a humor. "Of course not! When she last found me in Calgary, she insisted that I leave Alice and come back to her. She said she was much more a woman and could please me better. She tried to seduce me and even tried to seduce Alice just to get to me. When she saw that didn't work she just laughed it off and said she would give me time to get over my infatuation with Alice. I told her to leave and keep her distance. I told her I never wanted to see her again, but she just laughed as she walked away that day. Edward says she was already thinking of how useful I would be once she came back for me. We decided to move shortly after that fiasco. Maria will never let me go, I should have gotten rid of her a long time ago." Bella winced.

"Why didn't you?"

"Like I said, at the time I loved her. I felt I couldn't kill my maker. I felt tied to her. For every thought I had of killing her, I found two other reasons not to. I was blind then…

"_Maria!" Lucy screeched as I decapitated her. Maria had thrown Nettie's body into the flame pit. It was the previous night that Maria had ordered me to help her take them out. She had convinced me that they had betrayed her and had secretly planned to over throw her. I tossed Lucy head into the flames and gathered the rest of her in my arms. When we were through, Maria placed her hand in mine and we walked back to camp together hand in hand. _

"That was the first of many days Maria had manipulated me in to doing anything she pleased. She had a way of making any man crawl at her feet to do all her bidding. I was always at the top of her list, I was her favorite. She gave me power among the newborns and I proved myself to be a good law enforcer. All of my efforts were solely to impress Maria. She showed her gratitude to me by taking me to her bed after every successful territory take over. During my time in her army, we never lost a battle." I could feel Bella's anger and disgust towards me. I couldn't blame her. I felt the same way towards myself. "Please keep in mind Bella; I didn't know Alice existed at the time. Maria was my lover then, and I only did what I could to please her. She was all I really had then. I didn't know how much potential I held. I was blinded by bloodlust, and her lust. One night though, I noticed a change…

_Some of the older newborns were levelheaded enough to actually strike up conversations with me at times. One newborn in particular, Peter, was a lot like me in many ways. He was a soldier, very much aware of his surroundings, he thought about things before he acted, unlike most newborns whom were very impulsive. He was like a brother of sorts to me. Many nights we would sit and talk about our human lives, or what we could remember of it anyways, and of books and time passing…_

_We had lots of time together. I was surprised that Maria had let Peter live much longer than most newborns she sired. Peter was nearing two years now. I had no idea why she never had me destroy him as she did with all the others. I sometimes thought she never ordered me to do so because she was allowing me one acquaintance to keep me company when she was not around. Though, I later found out the real reason for his survival of course._

_One night, Peter and I were wrestling as a pastime. Some of the older newborns gathered around to cheer us on. I had spun around over Peter and surprised him by quickly grabbing him in the lower waist and crashing him down to the ground. I straddled him and pinned him at the ground with my elbow underneath his chin. I had nearly won, but a strong wave of lust hit me from the left, the force of it loosened my grip on Peter causing him to twist around me and hold my arms behind my back as he bared his teeth at my neck, winning our match. _

_I could only stare across the camp as Maria watched with wide eyes towards me. Peter let me drop to the ground, where I staggered to get myself upright. Peter held out a helping hand to pull me up from the ground. I took his hand and nearly fell to the ground as I felt Maria's lust grow ten fold. Maria's eyes shifted from me to Peter and back, her lust growing by the second. I didn't know how to feel about that. I was confused, angered, jealous, and lustful. In the end Lust won and I rushed to her side and kissed her deeply. I picked her up and threw her over my shoulder as I ran towards the home she had invaded earlier in the day. The home still smelled of fresh blood. The home owner's body, her most recent dine, lay awkwardly slumped in the corner of the kitchen. I passed it quickly and rushed her to the bedroom. The lust was flowing freely and I couldn't help it. But later that night, I asked her about the lust I had felt from her earlier._

"_Aye querido, celoso? Por favor! I can be with any man I choose, and I choose to be with you." I had smirked at her answer, but the smirk quickly faded as she continued. "And if I choose to have another man as well than so be it."_

_I quickly sat up in bed and looked down at her incredulously. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" She sat up on her elbows and smiled._

"_Exactly what I said. I like the idea of sharing, don't you?" She laughed. "Peter is a very handsome man." She smirked. Her eyes danced in amusement, and her lust heightened again, causing me quite some discomfort. "I've have desires Jasper, you two have invaded my wildest fantasies. The two of you in my bed together pleases me to no end. You do want to please me, don't you Jasper?"_

_I was skeptical. I had never thought of myself with another man before. I wasn't sure if I was completely opposed to it, but I surely did not want to share her. She was mine, only mine. I couldn't help but feel jealousy and anger that she would even think of someone else like that. Doubt also filled my mind, had she grown bored of me? I didn't want to loose her. _

_I began to feel the disappointment she felt when I gave her an unsure look. The disappointment flared into anger. I quickly soothed her. "I will not say yes, but I cannot say no either. Give me time to think it over?" The excitement licked through her and she pulled me to her again._

Bella was listening attentively. She sat beside me on the ground Indian style. Her doe eyes looked at me questioningly. She was enthralled and curious.

"I've never slept with a man, Bella, if that's what you're wondering." She breathed out heavily and nodded. "I couldn't do it. Not even for her. Which began our downfall…

_The next few months were stressful. Maria had been bringing up the topic of sharing her bed with Peter so many times, I was getting sick of even looking at him while out with the newborns. Peter was the closes person I'd gotten to besides Maria. I considered him a friend, a brother even, I was having a hard time deciding weather I should just give in to Maria's wishes or tell her how I truly felt about the situation. _

_Nearly six months after the first night she mentioned bedding Peter, I heard sounds coming from the abandoned house that Peter was guarding for the day. The jealousy licked at my skin like flames as I heard his cries of passion coming from somewhere inside that house. Before I could stop myself I rushed towards the noises, and blindly pulled him out of the bed. I threw him at the wall and gripped at his neck tightly as he tried to pry my hands away from his throat. _

"_You traitor! I thought of you as a brother, how could you do this?" I growled. _

_Sobs came from behind me, and I instantly realized my mistake. The petite blonde kneeled half exposed on the bed with only a sheet to conceal herself. I loosened my grip on Peter's throat and let him fall to the ground. I backed away from both of them. _

"_What have you done...?" I accused. "This will get you both killed! Are you two insane?"_

"_Jasper is not what it looks like it's…" Peter began._

"_It's exactly what it looks like." I hissed low enough for only them to hear. Who knew who else was around to hear our exchange of words. _

_I had barged into the home thinking to find him with my Maria, yet he was there in the throws of passion with a recent newborn Maria had made only but two months before. Charlotte was her name. _

"_I couldn't help it, Jasper. I've fallen in love with her. Please don't say anything."_

_I was torn. I didn't know what to do. I saw myself more loyal to Maria. Even though Peter was a friend, I couldn't help but think that if I revealed his disloyalty to Maria that her plans of wanting us both would disappear. I shook the thought from my mind as I felt the fear and pain beaming from both of them. They had now started to get dressed again. Peter sat on the edge of the bed with Charlottes hand in his. Peter took her in his arms and his love for her was something much stronger than I had ever felt before. And that sealed any doubt from my mind. I could not destroy their love. _

"_I give you my word, brother. I will do everything in my power to keep you two safe." I vowed. _

_Peter nodded and gathered Charlotte into his arms and walked out of the room. Charlotte took one glance back before they left, and smiled. After they left, I stood in the room for hours after that, wondering why I had never felt that kind of love come from Maria. _

"So you kept your word with Charlotte and Peter?" Bella asked.

"Yes, and it was a very difficult secret to keep and hide. Peter and Charlotte were very sexual creatures to say the very least. That wasn't the last time I had caught them in that act either. They were hardly ever careful. At times I had to lie for them, and watch out for them as best as I could. But I believe that their carelessness came back to bite them in the ass, so to speak, a few months later…

_It was getting harder and harder to find excuses for Peter and Charlotte to be gone so often together. But then the horrible news came, it would change their lives forever. _

"_Here is the list of the ones who must go tonight." Maria handed me a small piece of parchment with three names upon it. _

Hamilton

Finley

Charlotte

"_Why Charlotte?" I questioned quickly. Fear rippled through me. Charlotte had grown on me. She was a delightful woman, always looking on the bright side. I couldn't fathom why her name was on the list so soon. "She's only eight months."_

"_Why do you question me, boy?" Maria hissed, venom pooled at her lips, daring me to argue. _

"_I…was just wondering. It was just… never mind. If that is what you wish." I bowed and walked out the door to gather the newborns. Once I knew Maria was not watching me through the window anymore, I quickly went through the woods and rushed over to where I knew Peter would be. _

"_What's wrong, Jasper?" He asked when he saw my frantic eyes. I handed him the parchment and horror struck him. I placed my hand on his shoulder. _

"_I'm sorry." I said to him. Anger flared within him, he pulled himself away from me. _

"_You plan to kill her anyway?" He growled._

"_What else am I to do, you know Maria will kill me if I don't comply with what she asks."_

"_I thought you were better than that, Jasper. I thought you were loyal to us."_

"_I'm sorry…I can't disobey." I rushed back to camp then. I went for Hamilton first and then Finley. I went to Charlotte last; she sat by a boulder reading a book. _

_I called for her and motioned for her to follow. I pushed a good amount of trust to her so she would not question me until it was too late. I lead her a few miles out of camp, the same place where Hamilton and Finley met there final death. The fire I lead her to, filled the air around us with purple smoke and of burning vampire flesh. She gasped as she realized why I had brought her here._

"_Jasper…" she pleaded. "Please don't."_

"_I have to." I drowned her in lethargy; wanting it to be the least painful I could make it. And then Peter appeared in the clearing. I was close enough to Charlotte that he knew I could take her life much quicker than it would take for him to cross the field. The agony that came from him was my breaking point. _

_I let go of my pull on Charlotte. She seemed to snap out of a deep trance when I did so. "Go." I whispered. She backed away from me slightly, not sure what to do. "Run." I growled. "Go before I change my mind!" _

_Charlotte ran to her mate. Peter held her close and kissed her hard on the lips. He turned to look at me one last time before disappearing through the trees. "Thank you, brother." _

"I stood in that clearing for nearly an hour before I could face Maria's wrath. I told her that Peter rushed in as I was about to kill Charlotte, with fake intentions of helping me. I told her he double-crossed me and took off with Charlotte in tow. I made the scene look like Peter and I had battled in the clearing. She believed me then. I was sent out with a search party made up of some of the older newborns. I knew Peter was heading north, so I lead the search south."

"So you did stay loyal to them." Bella smiled. I smiled back.

"Yes, very loyal, even to this day. They still live on their own as nomads. They roam the upper east coast mostly. They actually visited me recently in Forks. The first night Edward spent in your room actually." I laughed as I remembered how my brother ran to her when he found out my non-vegetarian friends were coming to visit. He feared for Bella's life, though I assured him Peter and Charlotte would never do such a thing. "They don't share our diet, but you see Charlotte has a gift of making people forget things. They can prey on humans and not have to kill them. She simply makes them forget the feeding."

"If Charlotte has such a gift, why couldn't she just use it on you or Maria to get away?" Bella asked.

"Not all gifts manifest while in the newborn stage. Her gift took years to figure out from what I've heard."

"Do you think I'll have a gift?"

"I don't know, Eleazar will be able to tell though. That's his gift." I smiled. Bella bit her lip and then laid her cheek on my leg.

"Jasper, should I be scared?" she asked softly. I could feel her nerves start to set in.

"Of finding out what your gift is?" I asked confused.

"Of Maria…" She said lifting her head to look at me. I lifted her up from the floor and set her beside me. I held her in my arms and wrapped her with reassurance.

"I would never let anything happen to you, sugar. I'll kill her before she lays a finger on you." I pushed a strand of hair from her face and placed it behind her ear as I lay my cheek on the top of her head. After a few moments I continued my story.

"After Peter and Charlotte were gone, Maria had only gotten worse. When the war was at its peak the Volturi had ventured their way through Texas…

"_I am Jane." She smirked. "The Volturi have come to judge you. This here is Demetri, and Alec. We have come to observe your ways and find if the rumors are true."_

_The Volturi had been sent to watch us to see if they needed to wipe us out like they had so many armies before us. _

_Maria of course had no worries with their visit, she felt that her way of handling newborns was clever and that she would get praise from Aro himself for how good she kept the army in line. _

_And she was right. Aro sent an invitation for her to come to Volterra, Italy to come see him. He was intrigued by her and wanted to meet. We left her third in command in charge of the army until our return. _

_We swam for two days to get to the Italian shore. Italy was beautiful, I had never been abroad and it made me want to explore the land in its entirety. But of course Maria would have none of that. She ushered me into the Italian Volturi Castle. Its ancient structure awed me and I spent most of my time wandering the halls and gardens of the estate while Maria visited with the guard. It was two days after we had gotten there that I walked in on what truly was a heartbreaking and hard awakening. _

_I had found Maria attached to the fury that was called Felix. He was one of the largest and strongest of the Volturi guard. I stood horrified at watching my supposed _mate_ with some other man wrapped around her figure. She laughed. He laughed. My mind spun around in circles, lost. I didn't know what to make of it. I walked away. _

_When I confronted her later that night about it, she made her intentions very clear._

"_I have trysts all the time, Jasper. I have needs and you can't possibly fill them all, querido. I told you I would share my bed with whomever I please, so don't act so surprised. Amor mio," she took me in her arms and caressed my face with such tenderness that I melted in her embrace. "You're still my favorite." She kissed me and that was the end of it. _

"I thought I would be lost without her. I felt that, if I didn't let her have her affairs that she would get rid of me, that she would leave me. I couldn't bare the pain of not having her. I was jealous, green with envy at all the men she bedded. After that day she didn't go behind my back anymore. She openly let me see all the men she would bring back to her open bed. She made me watch sometimes, I'd get so jealous I would kill them and take their place at her side. I was a twisted person then. I look back on those days and feel ashamed of myself. But I loved her, and would do my best to outdo the other men who had the pleasure of having her before me. I hope you don't think less of me after hearing of all of this. I'm sorry if I'm being too crass. I shouldn't speak that way in front of a lady."

"It's ok." She said simply.

We sat on the couch in silence for about an hour after I recited my story. She still hadn't heard the worst of my past, which was yet to come. _Soon_, I told myself. Soon I would have to disclose the horrible secret I've carried with me for the last few months.

I had finally found the courage to reveal it all to her, but then we heard the sound of footsteps approach the house.

"She's here." I declared when I caught her scent. We both stood up as Maria let herself into the house.

"Jasper! Querido, Jas!" She sprung herself onto me and I repressed a shudder as her skin touched mine. Bella growled deeply and I mustered all the calm I could and passed it to her. Maria let me go when she felt the calm bubble out from me as I sent it Bella's way. Maria smirked. "Jasper has been very naughty I see. You've created a newborn. Is that why you left that little witch back in Smalltown, USA?" She smiled and took one step closer to Bella. I felt Bella's intentions before she was able to move and inch. I rushed to her side and held her back with one arm. Although I wish I didn't have to, that was my wife she was talking about. I gritted my teeth. Maria smirked once more with intrigue. "She's feisty, that one. You traded up, I see. I like this one." She strolled over to the lounge recliner across the room and lay across it. She seductively moved her leg to cross over the other. She saw me watching. "Like what you see?" I looked away then reminding myself, and picturing Alice in my mind. To hell with Maria, I wouldn't let her try and sway me in her old ways.

"So what's your name, chicka?" She asked suddenly. Neither Bella nor I answered. Maria stood up once more. "Are you mute? Answer me!" She growled.

"Bella." She said through clenched teeth.

Maria's features softened and she smiled at her. "Nice to meet you, Isabella. You're very pretty." She crossed the room and came back up to me. She ran a slim finger down my chest. "Not pretty enough for _my_ Jasper, but she can join us if you like my pet." I could heard a growl build up in Bella again. "I've missed you, amor. Let me show you how much I've missed you." Maria stood on her bare tip of her toes to reach my height. She stood close enough to me to rub her full body at my front and leaned forward to place her kiss. I turned my face in the last moment which caused her lips to fall upon my cheek. She hissed and grabbed a fist full of my hair in her tiny pale hands. I growled and stopped myself from fighting back; it would only make things worse. It took everything I had to push Bella away from me with a deep force of fear. Maria pulled at my hair again forcing me down to her face level. I couldn't fight her in this; Maria was much older than I, therefore much stronger. Not daring to influence her with my empathy, fearing her wrath if I did not succumb, I allowed her the kiss. She let go my hair and patted it back down to my head. She touched her lips with mine, and I could feel her intensity behind it. She wanted more, more than I could allow myself to give her. What I felt from her at that moment had brought me back to the times we shared and I only slightly let myself indulge in the past but quickly filled my thoughts with Alice.

_Alice, forgive me._

Just then, when I thought I was doomed, the last person I'd expect to see walked in to the room. I didn't think I'd ever be as happy as I was to see Laurent at that moment. Maria caught his scent and quickly let go of her attack on my lips and jumped high through the air to tackle Laurent. He took her in his arms and exchange pleasantries.

I chanced a look back at Bella. She had flattened herself against the far wall of the living room and was now feeling genuine fear. She looked back and forth from Laurent to Maria. When she turned to glance at me, I dropped my eyes to the floor. I felt ashamed of myself all over again. What would she think of me now?

"Laurent! It's been too long. _Sabroso como siempre! _Why hadn't you come to visit me in so long, ah?"

"I've been quite busy with my time these days, my sweet. I've mated now."

Maria's excitement was short-lived but genuine.

"What has brought you all the way to Alaska, _mi querida Maria_?"

She grinned. "I've come to collect wants mine of course! I've come for Jasper. He'll be coming back to Texas with me, right Jas?"

"I'm sorry Maria, but I have other commitments at the moment so I will have to decline." I said slowly. If I would have blinked I would have missed her movement. Maria's hand was at my neck in a flash. She tightened her hold and the uncomfort of not being able to breathe and her unnatural strength was quite unnerving.

"I said you're leaving with me, Jasper." She smirked.

"Now, now Maria. You mustn't get aggressive. The boy needs some more time." Laurent said to her as if she were a child. Maria let go over her hold on me and I gasped for unneeded air. She quickly turned on Laurent and glared at him.

"Excuse me, but who do you think you are, telling _me_ what to do?" She seethed.

"Just a suggestion, Miss Maria. Jasper has other engagements right now, Miss Bella is still quite new to this life and he's has a duty to her. I believe you remember the laws of our kind, Maria. You can't tear their bond unless he chooses to dispose of her."

Maria growled. "She can come with us then."

"It is not for us to choose, Maria. The Volturi would be displeased if they were to find out." He countered. He gave me hope; I only wish Maria would take the bait.

"I'm bound to her Maria, I cannot leave. I am in debt to my brother for her safety. And I will not leave my sired unattended. I will break no law."

"I don't care, erès mio! And I want you _now_. We'll give her to someone else. You don't have to take her as a charge. Let your _'brother'_ do the task!" She hissed.

"At the moment, I am the only one at her disposal. And I will fulfill my duty to her, Maria." I declared. Bella's confusion and fear mingled together and it was starting to fill the room with more unneeded tension.

Maria huffed. "Fine!" She pouted like a child who was denied desert before dinner. "But after this, no more excuses, Jasper. I swear to you that I will be back, and you will be mine again. If I have to kill to get you back, then I will. You know I'm good for it." She smirked evilly in warning.

Laurent quickly glided towards Maria and caressed her cheek with his hand. He held his hand underneath her chin and slightly pulled up her face to meet his eyes. "Would you honor me with a walk, my sweet?" With lust in mind, she swiftly took his hand and skipped out of the house with him in tow.

With both of them out of the house and running out through the woods, I took a deep breath and turned towards Bella. She was standing in the middle of the room behind me staring at the place where Laurent and Maria had just been standing. She looked as if in shock, I took a step towards her. She flinched and took a step back. I could tell her mind was reeling and her emotions were all over the place. I feared the worst.

"How…" she whispered. She gulped down the excess venom in her mouth with effort. "How does Laurent know Maria?" She asked.

"Laurent was Maria's third in command. He was created shortly after I was, as well as someone else that you need to know about." I revealed.

"You mean…" She started unable to finish. Realization and fear swam all around her.

"Yes, I knew Laurent before the phoenix incident." I let that sink in before I told her the worst part. "I knew James too."

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**Sweet Dreams and Good Night,**

**Jan**


	10. James Moreau

**I know, I know.. it's been crazy long. I just now got a new computer so I was finally able to post up my new chapters. I even updated chapter 9 with some new material so go read it again! =) **

**I'll leave this AN short, enjoy the new chapter ^.^**

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"You what?" Bella took a step backwards. "Why didn't you tell me before?"

"I've been trying to figure out how to tell you for weeks. I hadn't been able to find the best way to bring it up. It's been eating me up inside this whole time. I just couldn't find the right time to tell you."

"Tell me." She demanded.

"I don't know where to start…"

"Start from the beginning." I nodded and motioned for her to sit with me on the couch. We both sat down and I turned to face her.

"How did you meet him?"

"Like I said, Laurent was third in command in Maria's army. Maria turned him almost two hundred years before me and was in the army most of the time by her side. James joined the army about thirty years after I was turned. He was a nomad at the time and was a 'friend' of Laurent's from many years back. I worked alongside them both for many years and slowly I ranked up as Maria's second in command. James was always coming and going though, he never liked to stay in one place too long. He was what Maria called "the recruiter." He would search the country for worthy humans to turn and join Maria's army. He was always jealous of me. He wanted my position of power and my closeness to Maria. Maria for the most part saw him as a tool to enlarge her army. Although I am sure he had his time with Maria, as nearly all men of power in her army had taken her before.

"I couldn't stand James. He was always barbaric, never showed any kind of guilt towards the ones he helped turn or the ones he killed. I don't know how James could be void of any remorse towards his kills It was all a game to him. He kept count of all the ones he killed. He strived to find a more exciting way to catch his kill. He always toyed with the humans. If they were lucky the game only lasted a few days, the kill would be swift. More times than less their deaths were tortuous. The games lasted weeks, sometimes months. He loved to stalk his prey and play deathly mind games with them. You, being one of his victims, should know how cruel and vicious James was." A shiver went up Bella's spine. She closed her eyes briefly to calm herself. When she opened her eyes, I continued. "After years of having to deal with killing so many vampires and humans alike, I found myself getting more depressed and desperate to get away from the army, even if it was just for a little while. For years I tried to convince myself to stay and do as I was told, that there was nothing else out there for me. But I couldn't take all the emotions that were building up. Feelings of betrayal, fear, and anger were always thrown at me in the last few moments of my victims life. I felt it all before I killed them. It was getting to be too much. I was able to convince Maria to release me from my duties as second in command, she stressed it would only be temporary. At this point James, under Maria's orders, had gone back up north to another vampire, where they were to find more recruits and bring them to Maria. Maria decided that James and I were to switch places and his job would be my 'vacation' away. James had been gone for some time, he hadn't checked up with Maria in nearly two years and she was quite upset and demanded to find out why he had taken so long to bring her new recruits. I made my way up through the states from Chile where we had just recently wiped out another army. Maria gave me the city where she last knew James was stationed and from there I tracked him all the way to Biloxi, Mississippi." Bella's eyebrows knitted together in concentration trying to remember. "I wasn't expecting to find what I did when I got there. James had somehow managed to get control of a hospital. As soon as I got there I knew things wouldn't go well. The constant emotions of fear, anger, giddiness, and confusion were making my head spin. Despite it all, I decided to try and stay one night before I gave up.

_I walked up to the gates and called out for the caretaker. The old man slowly made his way to the gates. "Who goes there?"_

"_I, Jasper Whitlock. I come to see James Moreau."_

"_And what business do you have with him?"_

"_I have a message from someone important to him, Maria." The man's eye twitched and he nodded. _

"_He's been expecting you." Of course James would be expecting news from Maria. He hadn't checked back in for years, naturally Maria would send someone for him sooner or later. He unlocked the gate and motioned for me to pass. I tipped my hat to the man and walked along the pebbled path to the main doors of the facility. _

_A sudden thick dose of pandemonium nearly took me under as I entered the hospital but I reined it in just as quickly as it came. It was nearly midnight, though the residents of the hospital seemed to be fully awake. I could hear at least twenty or so different pumping heartbeats in the vicinity. I ignored my thirst and pushed myself forward to follow the old man. We walked down a narrow, dark hallway that led to a dingy stair case. The place smelled of acid, filth and formaldehyde to attempt to hide their smells. As we passed different corridors, I could hear hushed conversations behind the doors. Some were talking to themselves, others gossiped, attempting to figure out who I was. The hospital had three levels, when we reached the upmost level there was only a desk and a door leading to an office. _

_Medical files and pages lay astray over the entire length of the desk. An old cup of tea and half eaten muffin lay on top of one of the files that seemed to have been sitting there for quite some time. _

_The old man pointed to the door and then turned to go back down the corridor where we had come from. I cautiously walked up to the door and listened. No breathing, no heartbeat sat at the other end. The only thing that could be heard was the tapping of a pen on hard wood. I opened the door and there sat James with a devious smirk on his face. _

"_Jasper, my old comrade." His emotions betrayed his fake welcoming. He pointed to the chair in front of his desk. I closed the door behind me and sat in the small leather chair. "What brings you to these parts?"_

"_It's been nearly two years. Maria has told me to come and take your place for the time being and means for you to return at once. She wants a full account of all your actions."_

"_Just like Maria to come and check on me." He smirked. _

"_You haven't sent her back anyone worthwhile in too long. She's getting impatient." _

"_She's always impatient" He rolled his eyes and stood up. "Come."_

_I stood up and followed him out the door. We walked down the stairs to the second floor and turned left at the first corridor. We past a few rooms, some with large windows allowing you to view humans strapped down to hospital beds. Others rooms were empty and some had pacing humans talking to themselves. As we walked on James spoke in a hushed voice. "This is an easy and lazy place for a vampire to feed, perfect for you." He was amused. I was not. "Though, it will be twice as painful for you to feed from them if you are to stay here. The crazies here will drive you up the wall when you attempt to feed. Too bad I won't be around to witness your demise." I reigned in my anger as best as I could. James always found a way to get under my skin. The moment I had walked in the building I had already began to doubt wanting to stay. I had already realized that it would be difficult to feed here. But my empathy could help in that case._

"_You know I have my ways in dealing with my prey."_

"_You're no fun, Jasper. I'd be bored to death with the way you feed."_

"_Yes well your alternative disgusts me." Jasper twisted on the spot. He was only inches from my face. _

"_It is what we are. It is our nature. You go against nature. _That_ is disgusting." His nose twitched as if he smelled something spoiled. An agonizing scream echoed out from the nearest corridor. James stepped to his left and slowly made his way through the corridor. "I've been institutionalizing many from the area. There are some who I believe have what Maria searches for. There are five I will be taking to her. That should satisfy her, don't you think?" We stopped at the end of the hallway where the screams were coming from. "The human doctors are quite attached to this one. She truly is insane. All she does is scream her little pathetic lungs out. I think she's having a fit because they just chopped all her hair off. They found her infested with lice the other day." I peered through the small window at the door. The room was small and dark. The walls were of bare concrete. A tiny black haired girl lay in the far corner, wearing rags with her back to the door. She was shaking with fear rocking back and forth in the fetal position. I felt her anguish and I felt the sudden urge of wanting to help the poor girl. "Her screams are feral, they vibrate through her body. I sometimes come here to release my tension. It's quite the thrill to feel her squirm beneath me." He laughed. I wanted to rip his throat, and other parts of his anatomy, from him. Along with his thrill of the hunt, James enjoyed torturing women sexually for weeks before he'd finally kill them. And he thought I was disgusting? James was an abomination. James pulled out a ring of keys from inside his coat pocket with the key ready to open the girl's cell. I nearly stopped him but someone else beat me to it._

"_James, what are you doing?" A man in a long white lab coat walked towards us. As he got closer I realized he was no man, he was vampire. "I told you this girl has gone through enough already." _

"_You don't govern me. Remember your place. Remember who's really in charge here." James' glare was deadly. The man seemed to take heed to his warning but continued to walk towards us. _

"_I only meant that this poor girl has been tortured enough. She doesn't need your kind of torture when the rest of those so called doctors already do that with their 'treatments'" _

"_What treatments?" I asked. _

"_I don't believe we've met." The man raised his hand to shake my own. I complied _

"_I'm Jasper Whitlock." _

"_I'm Dr. Kieran Amnell." He gave me a small smile that faltered once he explained. "This girl was accused of being a witch by her family. The doctors here have diagnosed her with severe schizophrenia."_

"_But you don't agree?" I asked._

"_No. This poor girl is just misunderstood."_

_James sneered. "He thinks this girl has some sort of gift. I think she's just nuts."_

_Kieran disregarded him. "She says she has nightmares about the deaths of people around her. So the doctors try to 'fix' her. They put her through so many experimental treatments. They fancy __electroconvulsive_ _therapy__. I'm surprised she has lived this long. She is strong." James rolled his eyes at the comment. "If you'll excuse me now, I've come to give her some medication." _

_He stepped in front of James and slowly unlocked the girl's cell. As soon as the scent hit me I lunged. I pushed them both aside to get to her. The venom spilled over my lips. She was the sweetest thing I had ever smelled. The air left my lungs and I was thrown across the room and out the door. James grabbed me by neck readying himself to attack. I pushed at him attempting to break free wanting nothing more than to drink from the poor girl's neck, to devour her. Again James threw me in the air, this time I went through a window. I didn't have time to land on my feet. James had jumped out and pummeled me to the ground. I manage to throw him off of me. We had landed out behind the hospital close to the nearby woods. James hissed. I gasped at the fresh air trying to rid myself of the bloodlust._

"_She is mine!" He growled. "I have claimed her for my own. No one else shall drink from her. Amnell knows this, and you will too. Try that shit again and I will not hesitate to kill you."_

"_I'm sorry for undermining your authority on a claim." I said with gritted teeth. I outranked James in the army but not on this. What the hell had gotten into me? The fresh air outside allowed my thoughts to clear some of the bloodlust. I had never felt so pulled to ones blood like that before. My mind spun from the memory of her scent. I could barely contain myself. I had figured as much, I knew James had claimed her. I knew how territorial James could be so I would never willingly duel with James over a human. He kills anyone who would get in his way of a kill. I had no intention of going after that girl, but as soon as her scent had hit me, I had not thought twice. I just wanted her blood. I wanted her life. But I would have to hold back the monster inside me. "I'll leave now. I'll come back in a few days once I get the scent out of my system." James gave me a stiff nod and stood up from his crouch. I backed away from him slowly. He sped off back into the hospital, back to his black haired chew toy. I had the urge to follow him but instead I ran at full speed through woods, I needed to quench my thirst. I needed something fast before I let the thought of going back to drink from the girl creep back in._

_I ran three cities far and took down the first human I saw. I pulled the woman into the shadows of the alley and thrust my mouth onto the small of her throat. My hunger took over and I felt her thrash beneath me. I didn't even cover her mouth to stop the screams. I let her fall to the ground out of shock. It felt so good and so wrong. I remember how James had said how he enjoyed how the girl screamed. How it thrilled him to feel her vibrate beneath him. I twitched at the memory. I looked down upon the girl sobbing and trying to scramble away from me on her hands and knees. I rushed at her and sank my teeth in right above her breast. She began screaming again. I smirked against her skin, the monster in me had now taken over. _

_The entirety of what happened crashed down on me when her blood finally stopped pumping. I pushed myself backward across the ground to the other side of the alley. I had to look away from the mangled girl by my feet. It had been awhile since I'd been so animalistic with a kill. That girl had awakened the monster I had worked so hard to hide away. I disposed of her body and ran back to the woods. I stopped by a large oak tree and sat and the bottom of the trunk. I held my head in my hands, ashamed of what I'd done and how I felt when I did it. I couldn't keep living like this. I decided I would go back and tell James that I would not be staying at that hospital. I would leave a message with him for Maria. I would not being going back to her either. _

_I stayed there at that tree for two whole days. On the morning of the third day I made my way back to the hospital. As soon as I got there I felt something was off. The gate was wide open and the caretaker was nowhere to be found. I let myself in careful not to even breathe as I passed the second floor corridor that I knew led to where the girl's cell was. I pushed myself to keep going up. When I reached the third floor I knew for sure then that something was definitely wrong. All the files that had been on the desk were all on the ground. The door knob on James' office door was crushed and hanging from it. I slowly opened the door to his office. James sat on his desk, tapping his pen on the desk. He was glaring at the file on his desk and made no motion to acknowledge that I had just entered the room. _

"_I came to tell you I will not be staying here. And I will not be going back to Maria either."_

"_Figured." He sneered. "Maria will not be please." He looked up and smirked. "I will be her favorite again." I felt a pang of annoyance. Part of me still loved Maria so knowing she would be angry at me made me almost doubt my decision. But I had already decided. Silently, I turned to leave._

"_That little prat Amnell took the girl that night while you distracted me." He said in a dangerous tone. I spun back around in anger._

"_What happened?" I asked a little too anxious. James raised an eyebrow. _

"_That idiot had apparently fallen in love with the human. When you attempted to drink from her that night he realized her blood called to you, and thought you would come back for her. So he took her from her cell. I tracked him down a few states north, and found them in some makeshift shack." He laughed cynically. "He was so shocked that I had found him. He had no idea I was a tracker. He only had one second of thought before I tore him to pieces. The girl was seizing on the ground next to him. He had the nerve to try and turn that little bitch into one of our kind. I burned him and came back just this morning."_

"_And what of the girl?" I asked impatiently. _

_His eyes narrowed at me. "Nothing. I don't believe he did it right, maybe not enough venom. I left her there to her death."_

_I balled my fists in anger. "Are you sure she is dead and not turned?"_

"_I could care less." James sat with his feet propped up on the desk now. "She was of no use to me anymore. Her blood was tainted, she smelled of him. Like I said, Amnell was an idiot I don't think he did it right."_

"_But you must be sure! If she was turned, we can't just leave a new born out in the world with no one to guide her. She won't know what she is or the rules. You've killed off her maker, you've broken the most important rule of our kind."_

"_I have done no such thing!" James growled and got to his feet. The girl is probably dead already. And if she would have been turned it was Amnell who would have a responsibility to her, not I! He was the one who broke the law. He took a claimed human. He was the idiot who got himself killed. It is not a crime to kill our own kind if they interfered with a claimed human. I warned him months ago and he crossed that line."_

"_Where did you leave her?"_

"_It does not matter; therefore I will not tell you."_

_Anger boiled within me. I turned away from him once more, and without looking back, I left. _

"That was the last time I had seen him up until that day at the baseball field. I had looked for her for years and could not find any trace of her. James was good at covering his tracks. After five years I found Charlotte and Peter. They convinced me to stop looking and stay with them. I stayed with them only a short time then I went on to live as a nomad for many years." I forced myself to look at Bella for the first time since I had started my story. Her face did not show the emotions she felt. She was confused, angry, and sympathetic.

"That's a lot to take in. I don't really know what to say." she said in a small voice. We were both silent for a while. Finally she spoke. "That poor girl, that's a horrible way to live and die."

"She didn't die."

Bella furrowed her brows, confused. "But I thought you said she died?"

"No. James only thought she had died…" I urged her to understand.

"What happened to her then?" she asked.

"You haven't figured it out?" I thought she would realize. She shook her head, no. "It wasn't until a few months ago that I myself found out the truth..." I didn't want to have to say it but I knew that Bella had the right to know everything. "The girl was Alice."

Bella's eyes bulged. "Alice! No..." Dread came over her as she took in everything I had just told her Alice had gone through under the 'care' of James at that hospital. "Oh god, poor Alice. She must have been devastated when you told her. All she ever told me was that she was institutionalized, she never told me any details."

The same uneasy feeling I'd been having for months crept back into consciousness. I winced. "That because she doesn't know all of what happened."

"What!" Bella hissed. "But I thought you guys didn't keep anything from each other. What do you mean she doesn't know!"

"Trust me, it's been haunting me. And pardon my language but I'm scared shitless to tell her. All she knows is that James wanted to kill her and that a vampire disguised as a doctor saved her life by changing her. And that James later killed him."

"Why haven't you told her the rest?" She glared at me.

"How could I? You know the story now. It's gruesome. I hate what happened to her. I know that I must tell her, but I hate that she will have to know the horrors that she's been through. I can only hope she will forgive me for not saving her myself, and for keeping it from her for so long." I turned away from her, ashamed. "What will she think of me? What will everyone think of me when they find out that all of this was my fault." I tried desperately to close my empathy off from her. I was afraid to know how she felt about me now. She stayed quite for a few minutes. She let out a deep breath and then I felt her hand lay on top of mine at my knee. I flinched at the unexpected touch. I turned to look at her. Her eyes were glossed over. I could tell she desperately wanted to be able to cry.

"Does anyone else know?" She asked. I shook my head no. "Not even Edward?"

"If he knows he never mentioned it to me. I don't think he does. I'm good at keeping my thoughts hidden. I almost slipped right before we left Forks. I think he suspects something but I don't think he knows. God he's going to kill me when he finds out. And Alice, she's going to be heartbroken.."

Bella squeezed my hand lovingly.

"They love you, she loves you. They're your family, and Alice is your wife! Don't underestimate their love for you. Sure they may get angry for awhile, but do you honestly think they wont want anything to do with you when they find out? " I knew she thought and felt it to be true. My heart ached for it to be true, soon I would know. Alice will know the truth soon.

"That's exactly what I'm afraid of. For the first time in a long time I'm afraid. Bella, if it wasn't for me James would have never targeted you. He only wanted to get back at me. I kept everything I knew about James to myself when it could have helped. If I wouldn't have kept quiet, James would have never gotten anywhere close to you. They'll never forgive me for letting you get hurt."

"Everything will be ok." She whispered and held her palm to my cheek. I almost believed her. "Is there anything else I should know?"

"When we were in Phoenix, I had a run in with James. At one point when you were sleeping at the hotel I told Alice I had to go out and hunt. Being confined in a room with your blood pumping was making my thirst flare. When I left the hotel I came across his scent about two miles out. I followed it to a semi populated park. He was there just waiting under the shadows of a large tree, I think he wanted me to find him.

"_Well, well, well if it isn't Jasper. It's be quite a while. When Maria told me you had gone vegan I couldn't believe it. You loved human blood almost as much as I do."_

"_People change." I growled._

"_Yes, _people_ do, we don't. Forever young. Forever damned."_

"_I've changed." I glared at him. He smirked._

"_You know how this will end Jasper. Step aside; you know what happens when someone gets in the way of something I want."_

_You have no claim over her. She belongs to my brother, Edward."_

"_Brother?" James gave a throaty laugh. "My friend, you have indeed gotten soft." _

"_I am no friend of yours."_

_James narrowed his eyes. "Yes well, the song is still the same. Your so called _brother_ has fallen for a human. Did he even plan on changing her? The look that all of you had at the field told me that you were all trying to protect her humanity. How pathetic." He rolled his eyes and moved closer to me. "I can smell her on you, so sweet. You will fail. I will have her."_

"_Over my dead body." _

"_That can be arranged." He smirked._

"_James, I'm warning you. Go now, or my family _will_ destroy you."_

_James sighed. "Such a pity. You were an asset to the army many years ago. Now you stand before me weak, a golden-eyed disgrace to our kind. You and your new coven are poor excuses for vampires. Though I do have to say I was surprised to see her with you after all these years. I didn't think she had actually survived."_

"_What are you talking about?" I asked confused._

_James laughed. "Oh this is sweet. You really don't know?" he grinned. "That little black haired girl. Alice was it? Yes, Alice. The sweetest blood I had ever tasted. Tell me does she still smell as sweet as she did all those years ago?"_

_I never thought a vampire could ever feel nauseous. But I found out I was wrong. Alice. It was Alice all those years ago in that cell. How could I not realize it was her. She didn't smell the same. It was different then. But I still should have known! The pit of my stomach turned. I had never wanted to kill someone so much in my long life. I wanted him to suffer for what he did to my Alice. I had to remind myself we were in a public place. I could not attack him here. I growled, frustrated that I could not tear him to pieces at this very moment._

"_I can't wait to let Maria know what has become of her little pet." Laughing, he quickly disappeared into an oncoming crowd of teens walking down the path of the park._

"I wanted to follow him and kill him. But I didn't want to take any chances, instead of going after him I made sure I went a round about way of getting back to the hotel. I didn't want James following me back to you."

"I almost wish James were still alive just so I could tear him to pieces myself for what he did to Alice." She was gripping the leather couch by her knees. I pulled her hands away from the leather, and held them in my own.

"I'm so sorry for everything that happened. It was all my fault. He would have never gone after you if I would have just killed him that day in Biloxi."

"It's not your fault, Jasper." She squeezed my hand reassuringly. "Everything is in the past. He's dead now and that's all that matters."

"But I keep bringing trouble for the family. I turned you and now the wolves are after us. And now we have Maria to deal with."

"We'll figure things out. It'll be ok."

"Bella, how can you be so understanding? You should hate me right now."

"I could never hate you, Jasper." She gave me a soft smile. "I love you. You're family to me. You've been nothing but great to me. And you've given me immortality. I can't thank you enough."

I took her into my arms and held her to me. I couldn't believe that she could forgive me. That she could still care for me and allow me to be close to her even after everything I had just confessed. I found a new respect for her, a new love for her. I would love her for the rest of my existence like the daughter I was never able to have.

We embraced, silent and enjoying each other's company. She felt safe in my arms. I wouldn't want it any other way.

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**Again forgive me for not posting in so long! I had gotten a bit disinterested in twilight for a while there and had almost become what I hate on fanfiction. I promised myself I would finish this story so I will! Thanks to everyone who stuck with me on this!**


	11. Bonded (Revised)

**(Edited 02/14/13 - Added some more dialogue at the end of this chapter that should have appeared there to begin with. It will help the next chapters make more sense)**

**Damn you writers block! I know where the story is going just can't seem to get it all in writing. But here is the next chapter. **

**I updated a part of the last chapter at the end, added some more Jasper and Bella goodness. Reread and review! I got a lot of people who added my story on their alerts last chapter so thank you. Please review and let me know if you like where the story is going! I was finally inspired to start writing again but now I'm second guessing myself on how it's turning out. Let me know what you think!**

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There was a rush of wind whipping through the air, Maria stopped dead in her tracks. They were ten miles far from any human and non-human ears. Even the nearby animals scurried away sensing the danger from two deadly vampires, it seemed that not even the wind dared to blow on their skins.

"What the hell was that back there Laurent? Why would you spill out logic at a time like this! Why defy my wishes?" She glared at him.

"I'm not my sweet. You know the laws. He cannot leave her, not yet."

"Then you need to find me a way. I want him back. I want him _now_. It's been seventy years, seventy! I will not wait another. It's been long enough. I've let him have his little vacation and now it's time for him to return to where he belongs, at my side." She hissed, venom lingering in every word.

"Patience, Maria, Patience. The wait will be worth it in the end, you will see."

Maria swiftly launched him into a nearby oak tree. She rushed to him and pinned him to ground with her dirt covered foot at his neck. "I am not a child! Do not talk to me as such. I am two times your age. I can snap you in half as easily as that damn tree you just went through." She put more of her weight at his neck making her point when his throat let out a whistle of air. She had damaged his windpipe. _That should keep him quite for a while. _She stepped off of his throat and brushed off the wrinkles in her dress. She walked off as if nothing had happened. She kicked herself up to hang from a nearby tree branch and swung back and forth from limb to limb like monkey bars.

Laurent readjusted his Adam's apple until he heard it snap back into place. Instantly, he could feel the venom begin to work at healing his vocal cords. He hesitated, clearing his throat as he stood back up. He waited a moment until the venom finished its repair and slowly walked to where Maria was swinging away. This time he thought over his words before he spoke to her. "I just worry that, if you were to force him to go with you when the time wasn't right, you would be condemned for his own foolishness in siring a newborn." She jumped down from a branch and landed quietly on the balls of her feet just inches from Laurent. His instincts screamed to take a step back, but his mind knew better. Maria would rip him apart for showing weakness. She grinned at him, which to anyone else would allow them to relax, but to someone who knew better, Laurent kept himself ready for anything.

"It pleases me that you care." Instantly her grin was gone. "But I can take care of myself!" She growled and crossed her arms defiantly.

"I know you can." Laurent quickly said with a smirk. "I only fear that if you force him too early that the Volturi will come after you for breaking the law. You know their penalties, you know their power. Is he really worth losing eternity over?" He said, seeming genuinely concerned. He was dangerously close to getting his throat ripped out this time. Maria was livid but she knew he was right.

"Well then, like I said before. Find me a way to make him leave those filthy animal drinkers for good." Maria made a gagging noise and wrinkled up her nose. "It's disgusting to even think that he now shares their diet."

"If you don't mind my asking, why is it that after so long now you want him back? You can have anyone your heart desires."

"True." Maria smirked. Laurent licked his lips as she slowly closed the distance between them. She reached up and pulled his head down to her level. She slammed her lips on his. As her mouth moved on his rhythmically, his hands began to travel down her torso. She roughly pushed his head away from her face. She turned and slowly walked away from him. Laurent watched as her hips smoothly swayed. "Not that it's any of your business anymore, but I plan on building a new army, here in the north. I will need the best of the best if I'm going to achieve my ultimate goal."

"Some would believe there are better vampires than Jasper to control a newborn army."

Maria hissed. She turned to glare at him. Laurent stood up a little straighter. "He is the best." Her lips twitched. "But since he is inaccessible at the moment, James will have to do for now. Where is he?"

Laurent's face turned to stone. "He's dead."

"Oh." She pouted.

"He challenged the Cullen's for that girl you met with Jasper. He was foolish to attempt to take her from them. He thought he could win against seven of our kind."

Maria's tinkling laugh echoed throughout the forest. "Yes that does sound like James. Cocky to the end." She trailed her finger down Laurent's chest. "You know you could always join my ranks again, Laurent. Mmm… I could use a change in _sabor_. Think of the fun we could have." She smirked.

Laurent lowered his head to her level, was about to kiss her again but pulled back at the last second. Maria hissed and dragged her nail through his chest now. "Please Maria, forgive me." He tensed and took her hand gently from his navel before she could dig her nails in any deeper. He placed a small kiss on the back of her hand. "Thank you for the offer, but I have mated now."

Maria pouted. "But you could have much more fun with me."

"Yes I can only imagine." He let raked his eyes down the length of her body. "You are ravishing" Laurent smirked. Maria smiled at the compliment. Anxious to turn her attention to something else he quickly added, "Now, I'm not that familiar with the Cullen's. And I only met them once and for a short while. But I may know someone else who would be a much better candidate than myself, who can help you with the army and to get Jasper back."

"Do I know him?" Maria brightened at the thought of fresh meat.

"No, you don't. _She_ is actually fairly new to this life but very loyal to James. And right now she hates the Cullen's about as much as you do."

She groaned. "I don't like to work with _mujeres_ anymore, Laurent. You know this."

"Trust me my dear Maria." He smiled warmly at her. "I think you would get along quite well with Victoria."

"Hmph, fine. I will think about it but I don't like it." She turned her nose up at him in annoyance.

"So what made you want to build an army up north? You usually keep to the south."

Maria smirked. "Yes well I have big plans ahead. Like I said before I will need the best. The army here will only be the beginning. I have bigger plans for Jasper than just some damn army." She hissed. Laurent stood confused. What could she be planning? All she knew was newborn wars. Why change now?

"And what is your ultimate goal?" Laurent asked, genuinely intrigued.

She grinned. "Do you really want to know?" Before he could answer she closed the distance between them and held her body up against him. She stood on the tips of her toes until her mouth slightly brushed the tip of his earlobe. She whispered with a sound of deep need. "I shall build an Empire."

Wide eyed, Laurent took a hesitant step back from her. She smirked at his reaction.

"You will hear from me soon."

And with that, she dashed through the woods back the way they came, south.

Slowly but surely our days had gone on. It seemed kind of odd that things drifted right back into 'normal' shortly after Maria's sudden visit. Bella was lounging upstairs in her room, which was Edward's when we last lived here. I was down in the Carlisle's office using the computer to search for some new books for us to read. Bella had already read every book Carlisle had in the library and I had already read them twice over, maybe more.

"Any specific novels you want me to order?" I spoke as I clicked away through Amazon. I heard a slight creak as Bella stood from her chair upstairs and a moment later she stood at the door way. I smirked. "You know you didn't have to come down here, I could hear you just fine from up there."

"Don't you like my company?" She pouted.

"You know I do." I smiled.

Bella stuck out her tongue at me and rolled her eyes, reminding me so much of Alice. I attempted to stop the thought, to try and not think of Alice right now. It hurt too much to think of her and be so far away. It had been the longest Alice and I had been apart since she found me in Ohio.

"Anything you want to get is fine really."

"How about a romance novel?" I grinned. I turned the computer screen to where she could see it. Bella's eyes went wide. I had pulled up a picture of _The Shadow and the Star_, Fabio graced the cover. She made a gagging sound. "I think you might like this one." I smirked.

"Definitely not." She scrunched up her face. "Too much muscle is gross."

"Don't let Emmett ever hear you say that." I laughed. She shrugged and sat lazily on the leather recliner across the room. "So that's a no for Fabio… What would you like me to get you then?"

"How about the new Suzanne Collins book?" She smiled.

"Hmm, that's a great series. I've been meaning to get it." I pulled up a search on _Mockingjay_ and bought it with overnight delivery along with a few dozen other books I thought Bella might enjoy. "We should get these tomorrow morning."

"How do you guys do it?" She asked suddenly. From her bored expression I knew exactly what she meant.

"We try to keep ourselves busy with new things. Usually whatever is popular in the decade works. Emmett is especially good to keep us entertained. He is always looking for the most outrages things to do. You should have known him in the 70s and 80s." I laughed. Emmett and roller disco. It was epic.

"Too bad Emmett's not here." She frowned. "When do you think it'll be safe?"

Knowing the real question, "I don't know when it'll be safe for everyone to move up here. I'm sure that Edward will try and find a way to come here first though." She gave me a small smile of hope.

"So what's the agenda for today? Hunting? Tv? More hunting?" She rolled her eyes.

"Actually, I got a text from Carmen earlier and she'd love for us to stop by today."

Her face instantly went to fear. "I don't know… do we have to?"

I crossed the room and took her hand. I guided her to the couch. She snuggled herself to my side. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to, Bella. But we've been here for months and still haven't gone to their home. You got along so well with Kate and Tanya, why are you so afraid to meet the rest of them?"

"I'm not sure. I guess I just don't want them to hate me."

"There's no reason they would hate you. You're too wonderful for them to ever hate you."

"Well maybe hate is a strong word. How about just won't like me? They're a second family to you guys. If all of them don't like me then I'll create more problems for everyone."

"Bella, they'll love you." I smiled at her. "I just know it."

She bit her lip, still unsure. After a while she nodded. "Ok let's go then."

Carmen and Eleazar were at their doorstep waiting for us as we arrived. Eleazar had his arm around Carmen's waist and she greeted us with the brightest of smiles.

"It's so good to finally meet you!" Carmen brought Bella into a hug. I had already forewarned Bella that Carmen would embrace her, so she didn't flinch away by the sudden touch. Carmen kissed my cheek and ushered us in to the house. We settled down in the living room and talk about how great Bella is handling new life as a vampire, and what a wonderful job Carmen did on the house before we moved in. The whole time Eleazar was grinning at Bella. Bella's anxiety was building by the minute. If she were still human, I would bet she'd be sweating bullets.

"So, I told Bella about your gift Eleazar." His grin grew even more. Bella took in a deep breath. I almost laughed, she was so impatient. "Bella is about to burst with anticipation if you don't tell her what you know." His airy laugh filled the air.

"Well she's simply amazing." He paused to admire Bella some more. Bella shifted next to me. "I can feel her aura, and it's vibrating. Only it's wavering in and out."

"Is that a bad thing?" Bella asked a bit worried.

Eleazar smiled and shook his head. "Oh, no, I think that has to do with it being tied to your emotions. She's a shield."

"A shield?" She asked. She furrowed her brows in confusion.

"Yes, a shield. It's a sort of protection of the mind. I've never met one with such an intense gift. Though, you must be careful, my dear. It can be very dangerous if not used properly. Normally shields only have a mental affect but yours feels different. I think it may also have some physical attributes as well. The aura you have is very thick, it's as if I can almost reach out and touch it but I'd only catch air. Yes, I would be very careful Bella."

"I think you're right about the physical aspect. Sometimes I can only faintly feel her emotions, sometimes none at all."

"You didn't tell me that, Jazz." Bella frowned.

"I wanted to be sure with Eleazar first, before I said anything. I wasn't sure if it was just my own gift messing up or if it truly was you. I didn't want to get your hopes up about having a gift if you didn't. But you do." I smiled. Bella smiled and turned back to Eleazar. She was extremely determined now.

"How do I use it?" Bella asked anxiously. "I want to be able to control it, to keep my family safe."

"And yourself safe." Eleazar added. "First, you must learn to keep yourself safe. It may harm you if you try too hard to learn it. In your human years your mind controlled it like an involuntary movement, but now it doesn't seem to be that way. Everything that was an involuntary act, like breathing, pumping of your blood, and sleeping has stopped working since you were turned. They are no longer necessary so they have all stopped working on their own. You have to voluntarily use your gift now, just like you do with breathing even though you don't need it. You have to access that part of your mind and learn to keep it up if you wish. Because you used it very well unknowingly, I believe you will master your mental shield much faster than your physical one.

"Your physical shield is only just now manifesting yet you've had the other the rest of your life. Your mind can handle many things at once now, but you must be careful still. I've seen shields exhaust themselves so much that they have become weak for days, vulnerable. The Volturi have a shield, Chelsea. Once, she exhausted herself while in battle and the other side took advantage of her weakness. She was nearly killed." He stopped for a moment to make sure his point was getting across to Bella. She was listening intently and hanging on every word he said. "I know you must feel very impatient to master your gift, but again I must caution you. As long as you don't over exert yourself you should be fine. With all I've heard about you, there's no doubt that you will be a force to be reckoned with once you get a hang of it." He grinned.

Relieved, Bella let out the breath she was still holding. I knew her mind must have been racing a mile a minute with all of this new information. The one thing that mattered most to her was protecting the ones she loved. Now that she knows for sure that she has a gift she will stop at nothing to learn the full extent of what she can do and use it to help our family.

Bella asked Eleazar every question she had about the shield he knew in the Volturi. About an hour later, Irina and Laurent came into the room. They had been out hunting all day. Bella stiffened at the sight of Laurent. I held her hand and urged her to calm down. She squeezed my hand slightly in silent thanks. I returned the affection and slowly stood to greet Irina. I hugged and congratulated her on finally finding a mate. She giggled like a school girl. I turned to Laurent and extended my arm.

"Thank you old friend, I owe you one for getting Maria off my back the other day." He shook my hand.

"It was only temporary though. You know how persistent she is." I could only nod. Laurent slowly walked over to Bella. She stood from the couch and tried to calm her nerves at his advance. Laurent grinned widely. "It's nice to finally meet you on good terms, Isabella." He held out his hand. Bella tentatively took it. Laurent pulled her hand up to his lips. She quickly snatched her hand away and took a small step back. "Please forgive me, I am but old fashioned." Bella nodded and carefully sat back down.

"I'm just not used to that."

Laurent went to stand by Irina and I took a seat with Bella again. Laurent announced that Irina and him would have a wedding and would like both sides of the family to be there.

"Did I just hear the word 'wedding'?" Tanya called from the door.

Bella was happy to see Kate and Tanya enter the room.

"When's the big day?" Kate asked.

"We want to wait until the spring, you know how much I hate the winter." Irina said. Kate rushed over to Irina and hugged her.

"I'm so happy for you little sis. You're the first of us to find a mate! The first to wed!" Kate was more than happy. She was also quite jealous, though you would never know it unless you were an empath. "There are so many preparations to be done! We must start at once!"

Bella giggled at her comment. "You sound like Alice."

I tried to push back the hurt that her name gave me and smiled. She was right though, Alice and Kate are very alike. "Who do you think taught Alice her ways, Bella?" I pointed at Kate. "The other short little black haired spitfire."

Kate stuck her tongue out at me. This only made Bella laugh even more. I smiled at her. It made my heart soar to feel Bella happy and amused again. I'll have to get Kate to be around more often. Kate winked at me and then turned to take Irina by the arm. She walked with her hand in hand upstairs talking wedding plans with her all the way up. Laurent sat across from me and Tanya sat down beside me. She was annoyed and glaring daggers at Laurent. I nudged her with my gift to get her attention. She simply shook her head slightly in my direction.

"We are looking for a house of our own. We may have found one today." Laurent said with a smile. Tanya's nostrils flared.

"You're moving out?" Tanya asked in a dead calm. Her anger was boiling up.

"Yes, that is our plan."

"You mean _your _plan." She snapped.

"Tanya." Carmen scorned.

"Yes it was my idea, but we've mated and we do want to be alone sometimes."

Tanya nearly lost it. I put my hand on her knee and pushed her down as I drained the anger out of her, leaving only calm. Laurent's eyes flashed down to my hand, the warning taken.

"I should probably go help with the wedding arrangements." Laurent stood up and walked up the stairs to find Irina. Tanya glared at him as he walked away.

"What was all that about?" I asked so only she could hear.

"I don't trust him one bit." Tanya's anger made me feel uneasy.

"Tanya, you knew this day would come eventually." Carmen said sweetly." She's fallen in love. She wants to be alone with him for a while. It's only natural for her to want that. I know it's hard for you since she's lived with you for so long. But you must understand that she loves him now too. They've mated; it's a very strong bond. You should be supportive of your sister's decision."

Tanya let out a frustrated sigh. "I can't wrap my head around it though. Why him?" She spat.

"We don't chose who we mate with, Tanya. It just happens. We instantly feel that pull." Carmen explained. She walked over to Tanya and held her close. "You'll find out one day what I mean. It's an uncontrollable urge to want to be with your mate no matter what."

"How does mating work?" Bella asked timidly.

"Well there are a few theories." Eleazar mused. "I believe that it is a calling of two souls destined to meet. I believe God placed a perfect match for everyone in this world and we are pulled to that person all of our lives. Until finally one day you meet and there's that instant connection of never wanting to leave their side, like it was always meant to be." He smiled lovingly at Carmen as he spoke.

"Can vampires mate with humans?" Bella asked. Her insecurities rose to the surface again.

"Some believe that only vampires mate other vampires." Eleazar began. Bella began to panic and I helped her calm back down. "But I believe love can be universal. I don't think it matters if you're human or vampire. Remember vampires were once human too. As vampires, it just intensifies the feeling tenfold. Like with Edward and you." He smiled. "When he came up here last year he was a wreck. And the whole time he was here you could tell his mind was elsewhere. It was with you, back in Forks. The pull was quite strong for him. It wasn't just your blood that pulled him to you. He felt the pull of mating with you the instant he saw you. At least that's what I believe."

Bella felt doubtful but I sent her reassurance.

"I've recently came up with a new theory that compliments that." I suggested. "I think that the calling of blood to a vampire is a tell-tale that they have mated to a human. Not just any call though, I mean the blood that sings like a siren to a vampire. I find myself believing more and more that a sirens sweet calling of blood is the true test for a vampire to earn the love of his mate if at first she is human. If the vampire passes the ultimate test of not killing the one whose blood has been the sweetest they've ever smelled, then they would be mates for the rest of their existence."

Bella smiled up at me knowingly. She knew I was speaking of my own experience as well as her own.

"That's a interesting theory." Eleazar mused. "Carmen is the sweetest vampire I have ever come across. There is no doubt she would have been delightfully the most delicious human to me." He winked in Carmen's direction. Tanya gagged. Eleazar grinned at her reaction. I knew, truly, Tanya was actually quite jealous at the open display of affection. "Does Alice smell the sweetest to you?"

"She always has." I answered a little too quickly.

"Hmm… maybe you have something here. Have you shared your theory with Carlisle?"

I shook my head. "No, not yet. Although I'm sure he'll want to research the idea thoroughly once I mention it."

We talked for quite a while after that, and stayed a lot longer than I thought we would. We promised to visit the Denalis' more often and Bella invited them all to come over to our home next time.

It was almost sunrise when we began our run back home. It was nice for it to be just Bella and me again, though the house was too quite at times for my liking. We went straight to the library.

"So if you're right about the blood that calls to a vampire, that means Carlisle has an amazing will power. He turned Esme even though her blood must have been driving him wild."

"Carlisle has never drank human blood before, even though he turned three humans, he never drank from any of them. He has an impressive aversion to human blood. I think when it comes to Carlisle, even the sweetest smelling blood could not compete with his never ending compassion. Not to mention the love he has for Esme would stop him dead in his tracks before he could ever bring any harm to her." Bella smiled. "And Edward is the same towards you. He could never harm you. He loves you more than anything in this world." She played with the hem of her shirt avoiding my gaze. She doubted it. I lifted her chin to meet my eyes. "Empath remember?" I grinned. "Trust me. He loves you. And his love and bloodlust is the reason I believe my theory is correct. I am convinced your souls are mated for the rest of your existence."

She smiled. "So you believe we still have souls?"

"Yes, undoubtedly."

"Carlisle once mentioned that Edward doesn't believe vampires have souls." She frowned again. How can he see me as a soul mate, if he doesn't even believe we have souls?"

"I believe you will change his belief in that soon enough."

"Why's that?"

"Because you believe he has a soul."

She furrowed her brows. "That hasn't made a difference before."

"When he sees for himself that the only thing that has changed about you is your durability he will see the impossibility."

"The impossibility?"

"You are proof that a vampire can have a soul. For someone as self-sacrificing, selfless, caring, and loving as you are, for you not to have a soul, that is impossible. He believed you had a soul before you were changed. And even as vampire you remain ultimately unchanged, therefore when he realizes this he will see the truth."

"Let's hope you're right then." She sighed.

After a few minutes she bolted up straight from where she lay on the floor. "Let's do something fun."

"What do you have in mind?"

"I want to know what it feels like to fly."

"Bella, vampires can't fly."

She grinned. "Let's go to Mount Siri."

We were overlooking the edge of the cliff high up at the highest point of Mt. Siri when I started to have second thoughts. "I'm not sure this is the greatest of ideas."

"What, are you chicken?" She shoved me suddenly almost causing me to fall over the edge.

"No, I'm just afraid Edward will kill me when he finds out I'm allowing you to do this."

"He'll get over it." She rolled her eyes. "You said it yourself. I'm more durable, practically indestructible now. And besides Emmett told me you two jumped out of a plane before at a higher altitude without parachutes and you were just fine when you hit the ground!"

I laughed. "Now Edward will also have to kill Emmett for telling you that story."

She grinned and took my hand. We walked over to the edge and peered over it. Her courage was beginning to waver. "Are you having second thoughts now?"

"No, I've always wanted to sky dive but with my luck, if I had gone while human my parachute probably wouldn't have opened."

She took a deep breath and pulled us over the edge. The wind rushed upwards. The tingle on my skin from gravity plummeting us towards the ground was exhilarating. After a moment Bella let go of my hand and held her arms out like a bird. She closed her eyes briefly and just glided in the air beside me. Her long hair whipped in the air above her. I dove straight downward a good twenty feet below her and quickly took out my phone to take a picture of her. Although Edward will be furious at first, he'll love how unbelievably beautiful she looked at this moment. Before she opened her eyes again the phone was away and I was back at her side. We were only a few hundred feet from the ground when she began to slightly panic. I took her hand again and she calmed down instantly. Remembering what I had told her earlier she braced herself for impact. We landed hard onto the earth, sounding much like a loud clap of thunder, creating a fairly large crater into the rocky ground. We stood up in the rubble and Bella laughed when she looked around at the mess we had made.

"Wow!" Her eyes were wide and full of excitement. "I felt like superman!"

I laughed along with her. "Emmett said the same thing after the first time he jumped too. Only he then started wearing glasses and made us all call him Clark K. Cullen for a whole school year afterwards. "

She fell backwards and laughed even harder. After a few minutes we had the creators filled with rocks and crushed them down to look flat and almost untouched. We weren't in any hurry to get back so we decided to head for the stream we had been to during her first hunt.

I taught Bella how to keep herself underwater without floating to the top. She was a fast learner. "Once I had to stay under water and walk along the Mississippi river for nearly three days. I was hiding my scent and trail from Maria's minions a few years after I left her ranks."

"Speaking of, I never did ask; what did Laurent mean when he told Maria you have a duty to your sire?" Bella asked.

"You remember I said the Volturi claimed the lives of many vampires during the vampire wars in the south? How they were wreaking havoc everywhere because they were left to do whatever they pleased?" She only nodded. "Ever since then the Volturi passed new laws. If we were ever to create one of our kind we must take full responsibility of our sired until they reach one year of this life, unless someone else lays claim on them. They did it to reduce the amount of attention vampires were causing themselves at the time and also as population control. Hypothetically, if I were to leave you, it would be punishable by death for myself and anyone else who was involved. I wouldn't be able to really leave you even if I wanted to. When you get too far away from me I feel an invisible pull towards you. When you sire someone you're bonded to them."

"I see…" She felt deflated. "So I'm like a ball and chain."

"Absolutely, not! It's not like that at all. It's only that strong because I love and care for you so much." I embraced her with my affection. She smiled. "The bond is weaker if you do not care for the sired. My bond to you is quite strong. Do you feel the link?"

"I think so. I can feel it almost like we're tied together, right here." She pressed her fist to the center of her body just below her ribs. "But I feel something else, like a longing tied to it as well, like a second string." She scrunched up her brows.

"That could be your link to Carlisle. He did give you more venom than I did. I would think his bond with you would be a lot stronger." I felt a pang of embarrassment come from her.

"I thought the longing was just what I was feeling when I missed Edward..."

"It could be both." I offered. She half smiled.

"Does this mean that Carlisle is also responsible for me? Does he have claim over me as well?" She shifted her weight and frowned.

I grimaced. "Bella no one owns you if that's what you're thinking." I took her hand in mine. "You're your own person, no one owns you. It's mostly just an empathetic link to each other."

"So the longing that won't go away for me, Carlisle is feeling that too." She frowned. "Will it always be there, the link we all share?"

"From what I've been told the link usually fades away after a few years. Unless you're claimed by another, then it's almost immediately gone."

"How are you claimed by another?"

"Carlisle believes venom is what creates the link, so he believes it is also what can be used to sever it and be claimed by another."

"Do you think Edward would want to claim me when he comes here?" She asked.

"I don't know. That would be something for you two to discuss." I turned away from her to hide my own face. Of course she'd rather be bonded with Edward, he is her mate. I had come to like the link we shared. The feeling of knowing her presence is close, that she is with me even when she's not physically anywhere near me. It's comforting.

She laid her head on my knee and I stroked her hair down her back. She closed her eyes and let out a long sigh.

* * *

The days began to blend again, weeks passed. The Denalis' visited every now and again. We mostly hunted or were in the library together reading, we were never far from the other. We fell into routine.

Alice had seen that within a few months the family would gradually make the move away from Forks and meet us here. Starting with Alice and Edward, they would both graduate early and attend early admission to Dartmouth. They would move to Hanover as a façade for the wolves. After a couple of weeks there they would finally make it up to Alaska. Emmett and Rosalie would shortly follow. Then Carlisle and Esme would too once Forks Hospital found a replacement for him.

It would have been a perfect plan, if it wouldn't have been for my carelessness. How could I ever be forgiven now?

* * *

**I'm not giving up on this story. I'm going to try really hard to get my chapters up as soon as possible I'm aiming for this new chapter to be put up tomorrow if not Friday. I know there's a lot of angry people at me right now because of the cliffy and not updating for like 10 months. I'm so sorry for the long wait but again, I will try my hardest to have this story done, hopefully by summer. After this story, (unless I have a HUGE inspiration) I think it will be my last story posted on fanfiction. I have loads of things going on in my life that I just honestly haven't had time to do much writing. Even my original work as gone down the toilet. I haven't even touched that notebook in over a year. *frowns* Alright, anyways, I'll go back to typing my next chapter out, it's all outline. Just need..to keep...typing... **

**~Jan~**


	12. Unseeing

**I know it's been forever but it's finally here. It's been like a year, so if you're anything like I am you may want to reread the last chapter to get you back into the groove of the story. I had to reread it like 4 times to get me back into the flow of the story. So I hope you all enjoy the new chapter and I don't believe you'll have to wait too long for the next.**

**~Jan**

* * *

I couldn't believe it.

Just three more weeks and I would finally see her. Bella was all I could think of, now more than ever. I was more anxious now than I was months ago. Now that I'm so close to seeing her again I could think of nothing else.

My usual straight A's had dropped significantly because I did not care enough to keep up appearances at school. The teachers began to wonder if I was on drugs or depressed and thought I should seek medical attention, only then did I start to do the work again. I was becoming even more anti-social, secluding myself in my room, or in _our_ meadow. I found myself pacing again, a recurring thing as of lately. I only stopped to greet Carlisle who had just returned home from a night shift at the hospital.

"Pacing again, son?" I nodded which caused him to sigh. "I'm fairly restless myself today." He took his coat off and placed it in the closet by the front door. As the months rolled by, Carlisle was also growing more anxious. Ever since Jasper had taken Bella, his link to her pulled at him to follow. _It's been so long since I last sired anyone. I had nearly forgotten how strong the pull was._

I was insanely jealous of course. I remember clearly when Carlisle was bonded to me when I was turned. I could barely stand to be less than a few miles apart without feeling anxious or longing to return to him. I desperately wanted that bond to have been between Bella and myself instead. Although I was slightly relieved I didn't. The bond would have probably driven me mad if I had to physically feel the longing for her as well. "How can you stand it Carlisle?"

He smiled halfheartedly, "Not without hardship I assure you." He walked into the living room and I sat across from him as he took his seat at the recliner. "You remember the feeling I'm sure."

"Yes, but to be this far, for so long…" I could hear it in his mind; he struggled, almost as much as I do every day fighting with myself from running straight to Alaska.

"I can only compare it to my resistance of blood while at the hospital. I just have to, or someone could die." The harsh reality of it was, we could do nothing but wait and hope for the best.

I pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration. I was starting to believe vampires really could get headaches. "It's just now that the date is set, I'm getting more impatient." We had started to make preparations three days ago on when we would move out of Forks and figure out our cover stories. Alice and I would be leaving in three weeks, three very long weeks.

"Find something to preoccupy your time. It will make the days go by a lot faster. I'm sure you've noticed the extra shifts I've picked up lately."

I had already tried just that. Unfortunately my mind is capable of thinking of multiple things at once. So Bella was ever present in my mind, no matter what I was doing. And with Bella on my mind, then came my thoughts of the wolves. "Did you notice any of the dogs following you today?" I asked.

"For the time being it seems they have at least stopped following our every move." It had been weeks since the last time we'd seen any of the wolves following us, and we hoped to keep it that way. "But just because they have stopped following us, does not mean they have stopped watching us." He continued.

"Damn dogs." I hissed.

"They are only trying to protect their tribe, Edward." _Just like we protect our own family_. "If it were reversed, we would do the same." He was right of course, but that didn't mean I had to like it. "You should go hunting today." I could see in his mind how I looked to him. There were dark purple shadows beneath my pitch black eyes. "You haven't fed in over a week now." _The elk were running in packs up close to the mountain side recently._ "Alice mentioned she would be going later today." As if on cue, Alice skipped into the living room.

"I'll be leaving in an hour, so be ready." She glared in my direction. She turned to Carlisle next. "I spoke with Jenks earlier and put in our order. He said we could pick them up tomorrow afternoon." J. Jenks was the man up in Seattle that did all of our dirty work to find us new identities for every move. He had already worked for us for more than fifteen years, and his father aided us for many more before that. He was very useful to the family, loyal and discreet. He was not your common criminal but he was nowhere near innocent. Though he did his job well, I loathed him. "He was able to use the extra ids and birth certificates from the last time, he really only had to make some for Bella. I gave her Emmett's surname. I'm sure he'll enjoy that." _Bella McCarty,_ I hated the sound of it. "Rose and Jazz will take _Whitlock_. And Edward and I will take _Masen_. I assumed you and Mom would like to keep the Cullen name."

"Yes, that will work. Thank you, Alice. Would you mind also picking them up for us? I have an operation scheduled for tomorrow morning and will not be out until mid-afternoon."

"Edward can do it!" She grinned.

I groaned. "Why do you always volunteer me for things I do not want to do, you evil little pixie."

She stuck out her tongue at me. "I placed the order. _You_ can go pick them up." She sang.

"Oh and it took you all of ten minutes to make a call and I have to drive three hours there and back. How convenient." I rolled my eyes.

"Well you don't have anything else better to do tomorrow!" She had me there.

"Like you do either?" I growled.

"Stop bickering like children, you two." Carlisle interjected. He sighed and pulled off the glasses he used for appearances at the hospital and folded them into the front pocket of his scrubs. "I'll just have Esme pick them up." _You would think the fact that both of them are over a hundred years in age that they'd be a little more mature in an argument. Sometimes I feel like I really am raising a house full of teenagers._

"Oh come now Carlisle, you love settling are arguments." I grinned.

"Yes well," He stood up from his chair. "It isn't always this easy to settle them. And discipline isn't always easy to administer when it comes to you lot."

"Well, cutting all her credit cards always works for Alice." I laughed.

Alice immediately went to Carlisle's side and linked her arm with his as she looked up at him innocently. "You wouldn't _do_ that to me again, would you daddy?" I rolled my eyes. She only called him 'daddy' when she wanted something from him.

He embraced her and kissed her temple. "Not unless you give me reason to." She pulled away to cross her arms over her chest and pout. He smiled down at her and reached up to ruffle her hair. He moved towards the stairs and up to his office.

I followed his mind as he mentally listed things he still had to arrange with the hospital and for the house before he and Esme would follow us to Alaska. Forks was his favorite home, but he was looking forward to the home we left in the Last Frontier state.

His thoughts melted when he looked at the frame sitting at his desk. He picked it up and smiled. It was a photograph of Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, Alice, Bella and I right before we left for the school dance. _I try not to show it as much, but I miss her just as much as he does. Once my family is whole again everything will be as it should. We'll start our new lives together and finally be at peace._ He set the frame back to its place on his desk and turned to his laptop to look at his emails from the hospital.

_Soon_.

_We'll start our new lives together and finally be at peace_.

As soon as I had Bella in my arms again, then everything _will_ be as it should.

* * *

"Come on, slow poke!" Alice yelled up the stairs. I pulled on my hoodie and rushed down to where she waited at the bottom of the stair case.

"Seriously? You don't need to yell, Alice. Besides I'm faster than you'll ever be."

She grinned and dashed off ahead of me. She was already a mile out through the wood's path before I started to race off after her. "Even with a head start I'll still blow right passed you." Honest to my word, I had passed her a few moments later. She leaped into the air as I passed and landed gracefully on my back, giggling. I laughed at her child-ness and kept running for a while with her latched on to me. Suddenly I shifted her into my arms and carried her with my arm looped around her waist with her dangling downwards. She uselessly struggled to get out of my grip for she knew what I now had planned for her. I leaped over a river in the valley by the mountains and dropped her from my grasp just above the center with nothing but air beneath her. There was no escape for her. She plummeted down into the icy water, soaking her body from the waist down.

I landed right at the water bank and laughed at her expression. I could almost see smoke coming from her ears as she yelled. "Edward! You ruined my skirt!" She attempted to wring out the water from the skirt but only soaked up more. She growled and started her chase after me.

It was sometime afterwards that I put enough space in-between us when I could no longer hear her thoughts. Only then did I stop to hunt.

I concentrated and easily found my prey. A pack of elk were lazily grazing at the bottom of the mountain pass, just like Carlisle said they would be. I took one down and then another. When I was done, I buried the carcasses at the edge of the forest beneath a tree. I listened out for Alice but didn't hear her for miles. So I decided to climb up the mountain side to pass the time until Alice came looking for me.

When I reached the top I sat at the highest ledge and looked out at the expanse of forest. I felt a longing to share this site with Bella ever since I had begun to see her. Other than our meadow this was one of my favorite places to just sit and think. Lost in my day dreams of Bella, I failed to notice the tiny vampire barreling towards me. We were already tumbling down the cliff's ledge. We cannon-balled through the air down, down, down, we were an entangled mess of arms as we spun. Alice, giggling the whole way down like a mad woman, did not let go until the last moment where she gracefully landed on a nearby tree top. Too late to brace myself for impact, I hit the forest floor beneath me, face first.

When I stood my shirt ripped down the front. I groaned. Her giggles echoed through the trees above. She jumped down to land in front of me and held a strip of fabric from my torn shirt in between her fingers. "Now we're even." She grinned.

"No way!" I glared. She took off running again with me not far on her heels. She was very light on her feet and this time she managed to stay ahead of me by a few feet. Laughing ahead of me she ran for another mile back toward the house when suddenly she stopped, frozen .

I slammed into her back before I could stop myself. We both collided to the ground when she didn't throw her hands out to stop our decent. I quickly grabbed her and pulled ourselves upright.

"Alice?" I instantly dove into her mind when I noticed the glazed look cross her eyes.

It was Bella, and she was covered in blood.

* * *

I was running, following the link before me. She was close now I could feel it. I knew I would be too late.

If only had not been so distracted.

_I was in the shower thinking of Alice trying to loose myself for just a moment, trying not to let the tear in my heart completely take me under with how much I missed her, it would only be three more weeks now. After what only seemed like minutes which I knew must have been a lot longer for the water had long ago run cold. I stepped out of the shower and dried off. I pushed my head through a tshirt and started to pull on a pair of jeans when I felt a tug at my chest. It was then that I noticed the house was dead quite void of emotions. I blurred up the stairs to Bella's room. _

_The room was empty. A wind blew through the open French glass doors leading to the balcony making the curtains whip wildly through the room. Bella's phone began to buzz on top of her bed, but the scent that carried through the breeze made my body stiffen in fear. "Shit!" I ran to the balcony and hurdled over the railing. I took off running as soon as my feet hit the ground. Not trusting the monster inside me, I cut of my breathing as soon as I had realized the scent that Bella was now following was human. I now only had the pull of the link to guide me to her. Unfortunately it was easier said than done. _

I was still running. I couldn't pin point where she was. I tried to concentrate on it, but I began to panic. I would be too late. I did the only thing I could think of that would aid me to reach her faster. I took a deep breath and let the monster roar to the surface.

Instantly, the scent met my taste buds.

West.

I ran, faster now. I knew where she was. My throat flared, I was so close. It was thick in the air, it was everywhere.

Then I was in the air, barreling backwards. I crashed into something hard, a tree it must have been. The sudden motion gave me the slightest distraction I needed to try and control myself. My vision evened out slightly and a forced myself to stop breathing, it didn't help much there was so much blood already.

A man spread eagle on the ground behind a long hair predator. Bella snarled and hissed. She quickly turned back around and latched herself onto the man's side. Against my better judgment, I ran to her and tried to pry her off him. She growled and twisted herself again, only this time she sunk her mouth to my shoulder and pulled. The sound of muscle tearing ran in my ears. Instinctively I turned the opposite way and forcefully pushed her face with the palm of my other hand. Only a moment away from having my arm completely severed. The pain ripping through my shoulder sobered my mind from the smell of the blood spilt. I backed away slowly. I could feel the ice cold venom working its way through my arm to heal the wound at my shoulder. I pushed my shoulder back into place and let the venom heal it over. The cold flowing venom feeling worse that the tear itself. I could do nothing more now but wait.

A moment later, Bella gagged and released her lips from the corpse. She lifted herself to sit back on her calves. The man's body was still, sprawled over her thighs. From this angle, I could see her eyes were closed and her mouth was open. She panted as a trickle of blood dripped down her lips. Her eyes suddenly snapped open when she coughed up a spurt of blood. She quickly attempted to stand up but fell over. Too much human blood in her system was now giving her a sloshy feeling through her body I knew all too well.

I sat unmoving, still waiting until I deemed it safe to move toward her.

This time when she fell she sat upright with her knees pulled up to her chest, staring at the mangled corpse barely five feet away from her. Her fingers clawed themselves into the dirt and there she sat staring, unmoving, and no longer breathing.

Still afraid of startling her into attacking or running away from me, I still don't move a muscle. We sat there for ten minutes, me staring at her, her staring wide eyed at the body.

I took this time to look at the body more closely. The man had a homemade splint on his leg, there was a long gash running all the way down his calf with bloody gauze wrapped around it. A few feet from the body lay an open duffel bag with bloody clothing and an open first aid kit. The man must have been camping and wounded himself, and had attempted to stitch himself up before Bella had caught his scent.

I sat waiting, only now realizing I felt no emotions flowing from Bella. With what had just happened she should be swirling with all kinds of despair. A moment later, I slowly take a few steps towards Bella and call out her name in barely a whisper. No response. "Bella?" Nothing.

I slowly walk to her but stop half way through to gauge her reaction again, still no response. I walked all the way over and crouched in front of her to block her view of the body. Her eyes were unseeing, looking right through him as if she were still staring at the body. Slowly, I carefully set my hand on her shoulder, attempting to get her attention. Bella didn't even flinch, she stayed unmoving. She seemed almost catatonic. I decided to risk it, with slow movements I picked her up from the ground. I only half looked at the bloody mess of a man on the ground before I walked at human pace in the opposite direction. Bella was more important right now then dealing with the body.

It took ridiculously long at human pace to walk back to the house, but I did not want to disturb her sudden movements just in case. When I reached the house I immediately took her upstairs and placed her on the couch in her room. She was still unmoving and not stared straight up at the ceiling. I quickly closed the still open French doors. I then rushed to the bath room to grab towels and a small bucket from underneath the sink. I filled it with warm water and went back into the room. Bella was still in the same position. I dipped the towel in the warm water and began to wipe away all the blood from her skin. Once I rubbed away as much blood as I could, I peeled away the bloodied t-shirt and shorts she wore and quickly redressed her in her silk sleeping pants and a camisole. I pulled her back into my arms and brought her over to the bed pulling down the covers before setting her down softly. Her eyes still stared at nothing. I pulled the covers over her and felt the small silver cellphone side down the comforter. I flipped it over and seen there were twenty-three missed calls the last one from Alice. Of course Alice would see this. I instantly felt shame for allowing this to happen. I looked down at Bella still unmoving. Guilt gripped my heart and seeing how broken she looked. I lifted my left hand to brush the hair out from her eyes and then laid my hand over hers over the covers. I felt the slightest movement in her hand as I wrapped my hand tighter to grip hers. There was no other movement. I sat there just watching her for an hour when the phone buzzed in my right hand, a message from Alice.

_He's on his way._

* * *

_"Alice?" I instantly dove into her mind when I noticed the glazed look cross her eyes. _

_It was Bella, and she was covered in blood._

I instantly pulled out my phone to dial Bella's number. It went straight to voice mail. I tried again.

"Edward, it's too late…" Alice tried to place her hand on my shoulder, I shrugged it away.

"No! It's not!" I growled, dialing the number again.

Alice sees Jasper trying to pull Bell away from the bloodied man on the ground nearly losing his arm in the process. Then he was cradling her in his arms walking out of the woods into the house.

"It's done." She whispered.

"No!" I hissed.

"I'm sorry, Edward."

"I have to go!"

Alice grips my arm back. "You can't!"

"I have to, Alice, I can't just leave her like that! She needs me!" I pleaded. She bit her lip and nodded.

"But we do this the right way. It's already too late, we can't stop it from happening now. Lets go to Carlisle and we'll figure this out."

We rushed back towards the house.

_God Bella I'm so sorry you have to go through this, love. This is all my fault._

As we ran back I attempted to call Jasper's cell but I got no answer either. Next to me, I hear Alice call ahead for Carlisle to gather everyone. She doesn't say why just in case any wolves were within hearing distance but Carlisle knows better than to ask her anyways, he's patient enough to wait. Minutes later we were back. With a quick scan through the minds of anyone within a two mile radius, I confirmed that there were no wolves around to overhear.

"What's wrong?" Emmett asked. He was the closest to the door. Rose, Esme and Carlisle all sat in the living room.

"It's Bella." I grimaced.

"She's killed a human." Alice finished.

"_Fuck." _Emmett hissed.

"But our home is so secluded, how did a human end up so far into the wilderness?" Esme asked.

"Looks like he was hiking and lost his way, he got hurt and the wind kicked up his scent up to the house. Bella couldn't help it." Alice frowned. "I should have seen it sooner." Esme took Alice in her arms and patted her hair down.

"There's nothing any of us could have done." Esme tried to reassure. _Any of us, which includes you as well, Edward. Don't blame yourself for this._

She knew me too well.

"I'm leaving today." I declared. All eyes came up to look at me. I could already hear the protest in there minds.

_Edward, the wolves…_

"Carlisle, they haven't followed us in weeks. I can make it through unnoticed. I need to see her. I need to be there for her." I almost added _please_. If need be, I would beg them to let me go. The look in Bella's blank eyes was haunting me I could think of nothing else.

"Jasper is there, he will help her Edward." Carlisle looked away. _Poor Bella, I wish I could go to you. You'll be so heartbroken…Edward this is dangerous, please reconsider we can't leave yet. I don't want to risk any of your lives._

"Alice has already seen it." I said looking at Alice for confirmation. _Edward…please let Jasper try to help her first._ I begged her with my eyes.

"Jasper could help her…"Alice started. I felt betrayal flash through me, but then she continued. "But with Edward there he could help her faster. He can comfort her better." _You owe me, Edward. You better not get yourself killed. _ I let out a breath of relief. She quickly checked the future to make sure. She could see me reach the house, but could see nothing more. Good enough.

"I'm leaving right now. Everyone else will go at the same time we originally planned." I began walking towards the front door when Alice's hand reached out to stop me.

"No. They'll come earlier." Alice's visions flickered quickly through her mind, quicker than I could see. She turned to Carlisle. "Put in your two weeks at the hospital. Emmett and Rose will go with you, stick with the plan, and take a plane to New Hampshire and stay at the house for three days then it should be safe to drive up from there." She looked up at me now. "I'll be there tomorrow night after I pick up the order from Jenks."

I nodded and started for the door again. Esme gave me a brief hug and Carlisle walked out to the garage with me. I pulled my Astin keys from the plate on the wall and Carlisle walked in step with me over to it.

"Be careful my son." Carlisle held his hand up to the back of my neck to pull me forward to his chest. I lay my forehead on his shoulder. _Take care of her. _I nodded slightly on his shoulder.

"Thank you, Carlisle." I pulled away from his embrace and locked eyes with him for a brief moment in understanding. "I'll see you in two weeks." I jumped in the car and peeled out as fast as the car would allow and started my way down the curved drive.

As I drove through Forks and out of town I listened to all the minds I had access to, actively looking for any sign of the wolves. I took the ramp to get on the highway heading north. It was then I caught the mind of Sam Uley. He sat in wolf form at the forest edge watching my car driving further away. His voice was clear, commanding and final.

_We will not follow. But you will never return._

I could agree to those terms.

* * *

The drive up to Alaska seemed to take forever. I tried many times to call Jasper again but still no answer. Bella's phone was the same. It was driving me insane. My phone buzzed, Alice.

"I texted Jasper, and let him know that you are on your way up there. He's not going to answer your calls, his cell phone isn't in the same room with him anyways. He's too busy with Bella. He doesn't want to leave her side."

"What about Bella's cell? I groaned.

"Edward, stop with the calls. Everything will be a lot better once you get there. If he answers your call anything he says to you will just upset you more. So just let it go and get your ass up there, she's waiting for you."

"She knows I'm on my way?" I asked. I wondered if Bella was now regretting ever becoming a vampire. I could only hope she would not resent me for allowing all of this to happen. Would she even want me to be there to comfort her?

"I don't know if she comprehends anything right now, but in a sense she's waiting for you. She's unresponsive right now and she needs you to bring her out of it. Just trust me on this, she needs you and she wants you there. And stop thinking you could have stopped this. She's not going to blame you for anything." She growled. "Be strong for her, Edward."

"Thank you, Alice." I sighed. "I'll see you soon."

"Mhmm" I could almost see the smirk on her face. "Bye."

The rest of the drive was uneventful. By the time I reached the closest city by the house I was jumping out of my seat with anticipation. It would only be about a half hour longer and I would finally have Bella in my arms. Months had passed and now I'd be able to have her with me again, it felt so surreal.

It was about three miles out that I started to see. Through Jasper's eyes, I saw Bella laid in bed, unmoving and staring at the wall ahead of her. Jasper stroked her head gently as he sat beside her. Determined to get to her, I pushed the car faster. Jasper's head tilled up slightly when he first heard my car. His thoughts were well hidden. I wasn't really listening to them anyways. I could only focus on his sight of my poor broken Bella beside him. He pushed Bella's hair out of her face and tucked up behind her ear. He leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on her temple and began to lift himself off the bed. Jealousy ran cold through my body. _Damn I can feel you already, stop with the jealousy it's not like that.. _I relaxed only slightly as I followed his mind as he walked down the stairs and outside to wait for my arrival.

Finally I saw the house come into view through the trees that lined the drive way. Jasper stood out on the porch with his hands in his pockets looking down at the ground. I put the car into park and nearly ripped the door off the car, leaving it ajar. I ran to where Jasper stood, and only paused when his hand came up to my shoulder. At first I wanted to hit it away, but then I could see the inner turmoil he was going through. It hurt him to see Bella this way, and he just wanted to see her get through this and back to just being Bella. The Bella that would light up any room she walked into. _Just help her right now, we can talk later._ I nodded and wasted no more time I rushed straight up the stairs. I faintly heard Jasper stating he would take my car to meet up with Alice. I now stood at the door to my old room. When I opened the door her scent hit me for the first time since her transformation and I nearly buckled over.

It was such a different scent than what I was used to that for a moment I was stunned. She no longer smelled of freesia, more of jasmine and honey. She no longer had her human scent or the pulsing of blood through her veins. For a split moment I felt a pang of loss. But then realization that the pull of wanting to drain her blood was completely gone, my throat no longer burned when I got near her. That brought more wonderful thoughts to my mind. She was a breath of fresh air. Now a different hunger swirled within me, this new scent drew me in more so than her blood ever did. I knew I would never tire of it. It was difficult to imagine myself without if from this point forward.

I crossed the room slower than I would have liked, I did not want to startle her. I gently sat beside her, the same spot Jasper had occupied just moments before. A tear ripped through my heart as I gazed into her unseeing eyes. I reached out to place my hand on her cheek. Her skin was amazingly warm and supple at my touch, so unlike the burning hot flesh that made my hand feel on fire at times. But now we felt the same, and I would not have to worry about harming her anymore. I basked in the feeling of her as I shifted myself and lifted her up slightly from the bed. I moved beneath her, slowly cradling her in my arms. She starred off to the left for a moment, then as if realizing the world had shifted Bella blinked and looked up at me. She took a sharp intake of breath.

"_Edward._" She gasped in barely a whisper. That one word stirred up so many emotions in me. Mostly joy in her recognition, she was no longer unseeing. Venom weld up in my eyes but I ignored the sting of it. I held her to my chest and she gripped my body to hers almost painfully so. I did not care. Before I had time to properly enjoy our reunion, Bella let out a gut wrenching cry. Her nails dug into my back in a death grip, holding me impossibly closer to her. She wept in earnest now against my chest.

"Shhh Bella, it's ok. I'm here now, everything will be ok. _Bella. My Bella._"

All I could do was hold her and try to soothe her as best as I could. I only hope it worked.

* * *

**Next chapter is outlined, just need to find the time to type it out. Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I know it was a bit of filler but I'm hoping you liked it just as well.  
**

**Please give me some feedback and review! I want to know if I'm completely effing this up or if you like the direction this is going. Please give me your input and tell me if there's anything you'd like to see happen or see more of and what you think of the story thus far. **

**Thank you all for sticking with me all this time!**

**~Jan**


	13. Finally

**Hello Everyone!**

**Another chapter posted and you didn't have to wait another 9 months =D**

**I'm so happy to be writing again, please read and review, I'd love to hear some feedback!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything Twilight, though I like to play with the more underdeveloped characters and make them my own!**

* * *

It was hours before her dry sobs turned into just a soft whimper. Eventually those faded away as well. Her breathing had finally evened out, and for a moment I thought she had fallen asleep. Then I remembered she would never be able to again. I slowly rearranged her in my lap and loosened the death grip she had on my ribs. I looked upon her face again, the first time in hours. I could see the differences in her, the longer hair with amber undertones, the higher cheek bones, the longer lashes, and more muscle than before. But yet still she was my Bella, the same Bella I love, only more enhanced.

"Bella." I whispered. She swiftly reached up and put a finger to my lips to stop me from saying anything else. Her finger then trailed across my cheek for a moment and then she cupped the side of my face. I brought up my hand and covered hers as well. She leaned into it and placed her other hand over mine to hold it there.

"You're so warm." Was the first thing she said other than my name hours ago.

"So are you." I smiled.

"Yes, but now we're the same" She smiled. There was so much emotion into her simple statement. My heart felt light at seeing her finally smile after so much weeping. Then I thought of the cause that brought her to weep.

"Bella, I—"

"No!" She brought her hand over to cover my entire mouth. "Don't say you're sorry." She started to bring down her hand.

"But Bella, I—" I started again. She quickly covered my mouth again, only this time a lot harder.

"I said no." She narrowed her eyes at me. I'd seen that look before, determination. Although now she looked back at me with red eyes instead of brown, which only made me want to apologize again. Instead I only nodded. She slowly lifted away her hand again. I took her retreating hand in mine and intertwined our fingers.

"I love you, Bella." I could see all the emotions dancing in her eyes. I was elated to see that I could still read her eyes. Her eyes revealed so much about her. I couldn't believe how lucky I was. What did I do to deserve such a marvelous creature?

I leaned in closer to her allowing my hand on her cheek to run through her hair to the back of her neck. Her eyes shifted to my lips and then back to my eyes. I pulled her to me and caught her lips with mine. I indulged in the heat her lips caused. She gasped lightly and when her breath hit my lips a whole new desire rushed through me. She added to my desires when the tip of her tongue touched my bottom lip. I hesitated only for a moment. This was usually where I would pull away before I would lose control. I had nearly forgetting she was no longer human. The corner of my mouth twitched and I parted my lips to allow her entrance. I could barely contain myself when for the first time I felt the heat of her tongue on mine. She moaned into my mouth at the feeling. It vibrated within me. Her hands gripped my sides and pulled me closer as I deepened the kiss. Since we did not have to breathe, I did not intend to stop kissing her for hours, but after a few minutes I had to pull away slightly because of the pain at my sides. Bella had a death grip on my hips. I almost laughed, now the tables had turned. She would have to learn to be careful not to break me now that she was stronger than I was. I didn't want her to worry about it at the moment though, so when I slowly pulled away from her I placed my forehead on hers and took her hands in mine. I lost myself in her beautiful face. Her eyes were still closed and she was chewing on her bottom lip. Her eyes fluttered open to gaze at me.

"I love you." She sighed happily. Her lips ghosted my own again. I kissed her lips again, once, twice, and then another just for good measure.

"You're mine forever now." I declared as I tucked back a piece of her hair behind her ear.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

* * *

We lay in bed not speaking for a while. Her head was on my chest as I leaned back on the headboard. She had been too quiet. It was times like this I wish I could read her mind. I knew she was thinking about something really hard. Every now and then her brow furrowed or she closed her eyes.

"What are you thinking?" I couldn't help but ask. Not knowing her thoughts was making me anxious.

She did not answer, only turned her head away to look out toward the balcony. I tilted her head to look up at me. "What's wrong?" I pleaded. She pulled out of my embrace and turned away from me again. I felt a pang of hurt as she whipped her head out of my grip. Something was definitely wrong. She stood up and walked over to the closed French doors leading to the balcony.

"Go head and say it." She hissed.

"Say what?" I asked confused at her sudden anger.

"Say it! Say I told you so!" She held her hands in fists at her sides. I cringed. I knew instantly what she meant. She knew I didn't want this life for her. This was the kind of thing I never wanted her to have to go through. Before she was turned, I was always telling her she didn't know what she was getting into, that she would regret it. That she would not be able to control herself. My momentary silence only made things worse. "That's what I thought." She whispered to herself.

I rushed over and took her in my arms again. I half expected her to push me away but she didn't. I wouldn't have blamed her if she had. Even though I thought all of these things, I would never throw it in her face, especially not after what had happened. I lifted her chin to look up at me again.

"Bella, I would never say that to you." I sighed. How could I get her to understand? Yes, I did warn her. But I didn't _want_ this to happen. "If I could turn back time I would—"

"You would what? Would you have risked the family just to stop me from killing the human? Would have stopped my change? Would have never moved to Forks?" She shifted her eyes away from me but didn't turn her face away. Still I felt the hurt creep up through my body.

"Bella, meeting you, is the single most amazing and beautiful thing that has ever happened to me." She looked back into my eyes. I could see my own reflect back in hers. I could only hope she would see all the love behind them. "I can't change what happened. But I will do everything I can to help you through this. I promise." The look she gave me was heartbreaking. For a moment, I was afraid that she would fall back into the comatose state she was in before I got here.

"But what if I slip again?" She whispered. I cupped her cheek.

"I won't let that happen." I promised.

"You can't be there twenty-four seven, Edward. It could happen again." She began to push away from me but I held her closer. Brief flashes came to mind of times when Emmett and Jasper had slipped over that last few years. She was right, it could happen. Regardless of how careful we were there was still that possibility. But that didn't mean we couldn't find a way to avoid it as much as possible.

"We could move to Antarctica." I smirked trying to lighten her mood. It worked. She laughed. It warmed my heart to see her in a better mood.

"Poor penguins." She said after a moment.

"Polar bears?" I suggested.

"But there's not that many of them left!" She pouted.

"Well then we'll figure something else out."

"Okay." She smiled softly and leaned in to nuzzle her head into the crook of my neck. I lifted her up and brought her back to the bed with me. She let out a deep breath as I set her down. "I'm sorry for yelling at you."

"Don't worry about all that, love. I understand." I kissed the top of her head and held her close.

"You would wouldn't you?" She mused. "I can't imagine how excruciatingly painful it must have been to be anywhere near me while I was human." She looked up at me sadly. "It must have been torture."

I smiled down at her. "It was worth every ache to just be in your presence. It was getting easier there towards the end.." She grabbed my hand and held it in both of hers.

"And now?" She asked tentatively. "Do I smell different?"

"Yes, very."

"Is that bad?" She asked quickly. I shifted her and held her in my lap, cradling her against myself.

"I didn't think it was possible for you to smell more wonderful than you did before. I placed my cheek on the top of her head and inhaled deeply. "The potent smell of your blood is barely there. It's faint beneath the surface." I brushed my thumb over her palm.

"Oh." She breathed. I pulled back slightly too look at her again.

"I love your scent. I think it might even be more intoxicating that your human scent." I smirked. "That's a good thing. I don't have to worry about killing you. Although I will miss the smell of the freesias, this new scent of jasmine and honey is a brand I much prefer."

She smiled. "You smell like honey too and lilac." She breathed in deep and closed her eyes. "It's like breathing in a breath of fresh air on a sunny day in our meadow." She bit her lip. A nervous trait brought over from her human self. I grinned, she still looked so adorable went she did that. I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers. I could feel her lips pull into a frown as I pulled away. The pout on her lips was equally adorable, so I kissed her again. "I don't think I could ever get tired of kissing you." She sighed as I pulled away again.

"Good thing we can never get physically tired." I smirked. She smiled and placed her cheek on my chest. We lay there a few moments before she spoke seriously again.

"What are we…What if that man had a family? We can't just, you know, dispose… How will his family ever find closure?" The hurt in her voice was evident. And I knew she was thinking of her closure with Charlie.

"It'll be ok. Alice is handling that to make sure he gets back to his family." I assured.

"Alice?" She gasped and lifted herself to sit up straight. "Alice is here?"

"Yes, she got in about two hours ago."

"Where is she?" She jumped out of the bed. "I want to see her!"

"She's not here right now. She'll be back later. She wanted to leave us alone for a while."

"Oh." She walked back over and into my arms. Again there was silence between us for what seemed like hours. "Will I ever get to see Charlie again" She asked. I held her a little tighter.

"I don't know, Bella." I sighed. "It's complicated."

"I understand." Her head dropped and she twisted the fabric of the duvet in her hands. "I don't want to hurt Charlie."

"That's not what I'm worried about. Your thirst will eventually wane. The wolves are the complication." I sighed. "Has Jasper told you much about the wolves?"

"Not too much. Just that they've been following you since we left and about the treaty…"

"In the treaty is specifies that we are to not bite any humans or the treaty is void. Bite, not kill. We violated the treaty, Bella."

"We could be careful… Maybe we could see him years from now. Charlie is still fairly young still. We could wait until the wolves forget about me or leave…"

"Unfortunately the wolves are more like us than we originally thought. They don't age like humans. As long as they continue to turn, they have immortal youth. Now that the wolves know we go back to Forks every fifty years or so, they'll be on guard. They won't risk their tribe. Especially after everything that happened this time around. They'll be watching and waiting for us to return."

"Well what if I go by myself? They wouldn't be expecting me. I would go and leave before anyone would even notice me." She pleaded. She was desperate for a way to make it work. I shook my head sadly.

"We can't take that risk, Bella. If they happened to see you or catch your scent, they'd kill you on the spot. They'd instantly know we had something to do with your change and hunt us down next." Bella shivered and nodded once.

It was a while before either of us spoke again. She slipped her arms around me to hug me too her. I placed my forehead on hers and gazed into her eyes. "I love you." I attempted to put as much passion as I could in to my voice. "I don't know what I would do if I loss you."

I could tell her mood had suddenly shifted again. She was grinning now. "Well good thing we never have to worry about that anymore." She pushed me down on to my back and pinned me to the bed. With her strength, I couldn't move, not that I wanted to. She crushed her lips against mine. They smelled of her and the feel of her full body against mine was intoxicating. I had fantasized about being so carefree with her, not having to worry about breaking her for so long now. She was no longer fragile in my hands. She moved her hand from my arm and reached up to comb her hand through my hair. My now free hand moved instinctively to her hip, where her shirt and risen up. I felt the muscles on her lower back move and she pressed herself closer to me to deepen our kiss. I raised my hand from the small of her back up along her spine. A movement that caused her to stop her kiss and elicit a gasp. I followed her movement and reached up to continue the kiss. I was graced with the permission to deepen the kiss once more with a slight moan from Bella. The taste of her was like a liquid version of her scent. I was reminded of the way her blood had tasted in the ballet studio and it could never compare to this. I now knew I would never miss the taste or smell of her blood ever again. This was _much_ better. She released my other arm to cup my face in her hands. I could tell she was getting lost in the moment because she was being a little more forceful. My other hand reached out and found her lower thigh which I hitched up to my hip and rose us up into a sitting position with her in my lap. So many pent up emotions flooded through me as she raked her hands down my back. I only noticed she had ripped my shirt when I felt the heat of her touch on my bare back. I wasn't used to feeling this way. I felt like I was on overdrive. In the back of my mind my thoughts started to creep up on me. I knew what was coming next. I knew what I wanted, what I desired. I didn't want to hold back, she was no longer breakable. I pressed her impossibly closer never wanting to let her go. She whimpered and dug her nails into my lower back and crushed me too her.

"Bella." I gasped and attempted to push away from her slightly.

"Damn it. I knew it." Bella leaned back, her arms raised to link around my neck. She pouted. "I knew it was too good to be true."

I almost didn't hear her. I was too distracted by the rest of her. Her shirt was gone, she sat before me in a lace purple bra. _When the hell did that happen and how the hell did I not notice before now?_

Bella's laugh brought my attention up to her face. With a laugh still in her voice she raised an eyebrow as she teased. "Like what you see, Mr. Cullen?"

I smirked. "Of course I do."

"Mhmm… But still you stopped me." She let her arms fall from my neck and frowned. She started to cover herself up. When I realized what she must be thinking, she had already wrapped herself with a bed sheet. She let her hair fall over her face like a curtain and turned away from me. "Why don't you still want me?" She whispered. Her voice tore through me. I reached for her, and tucked her hair behind her ears. "Bella, I want you more than anything, in every way." I chuckled slightly and she instantly turned to glare at me. "Bella, I only stopped because you were crushing me."

Her eyes went wide and she scrambled off me taking the sheets with her. "Oh! I'm so sorry, Edward!"

"Don't be, it's ok. You just have to be careful. I'm the breakable one now." I smirked. She still looked unsure. She looked back at me, thoughtful. I wanted to take her in my arms and continue where we had left off but it seemed, at least for now, that the moment had passed.

"What are you thinking, love?" Her eyes danced in mine, what I wouldn't give to at least be able to glance in to her mind for just a moment. She looked away slightly, and I could tell that if she were still human, she would be blushing.

"Well I was just imagining… how different things would have been if we would have met back when you were human." I held back a frown. Things would have been extremely different. I would be able to offer Bella so much more… "Would you have courted me?" She smiled.

"Of course I would have, although our courtship would have been quite short. I would have immediately asked your father for your hand, after just our first meeting." I smirked. I took her hand in mine and sighed. "I would have loved to give you children, grow old with you and met our grandchildren together." I frowned. It pained me to not be able to give her what any normal man could. She squeezed me hand to get my attention.

"Edward, I've already told you before I never really cared to have children. I mean if it was _your_ child I wouldn't mind, but I never really planned to have children. So don't beat yourself up over it. There's so much more we could have now." She was smiling and it made my heart swell. "I have you forever instead of just one lifetime."

I grinned and pulled her hand up to place a gentle kiss on her knuckles. "So did you imagine yourself in 1918 with me, all dolled up in the current fashions?"

She grinned. "Big hat, umbrella, corset, long flowing dress…yeah I could see myself in the latest fashions. I've always had a fondness for the fashions in that era." I could see it in my mind, Bella in a dress like my mother's use to wear, walking down the path overlooking Lake Michigan on Chicago's lakefront. I would be the perfect gentleman and link our arms together as we walked, conversing on the latest book she read and I would tell her about the latest song I wrote. Then I would bring her home to meet my mother. She would have loved to meet Bella. "And you just imagined it as well." She smiled. I nodded. "Edward?"

"Yes, Love?"

"Well…I," She started. "You want to be with me forever, right?" She asked softly.

"Of course I do, Bella. More than anything." I pulled her closer to me and kissed her lips softly.

"Well I was just wondering…and we don't have to if you don't want to, but I kind of want to make it more official." By the time she was done speaking she was looking so unsure of herself and was too nervous to look me in the eyes. If she would have she would have noticed the growing grin on my face.

"Bella." I tilled her chin up to meet my eyes. "Are you asking me to marry you?"

She smiled softly. "I guess I am."

I pulled her to me and kissed her passionately. She started to pull away and I found myself whimpering at the loss of contact.

"Is that a yes?" She laughed.

"I would be honored if you would be my wife, Bella. I million times yes."

She cupped my cheek in her hand. "I love you." She whispered.

"Forever." I agreed. I pulled her up to my lap tossing away the blanket she had wrapped herself in. I closed the distance between us and captured her lips in mine again.

In my heart she was already my wife, and I wanted to show her just how much I really did love her.

* * *

_I swear they're going to be worse that Emmett and Rose._

I inwardly groaned at Alice's thoughts. Alice and Jasper were driving back towards the house now, still about eight miles out.

Bella stirred. She had her head rested on my chest, facing upwards to look at me. I combed my hand through her silky brown hair undoing some of the tangles. "What are you frowning at?" She asked.

"Alice and Jasper will be here in a moment."

Her eyes went wide and she dashed over to the other side of the room to pick through clothes in the dresser. I pouted as I watched her get dressed. "I much prefer you removing them." I commented as she slid on a pair of shorts. She poked her tongue out at me and threw a pair of jeans at me. I caught them with ease. I had little time to enjoy the view before we could hear Jasper and Alice pull up and come through the front door.

I pulled on my jeans as Bella took one last look in the mirror to make sure she looked presentable. I rushed to her, and wrapped my arms around her waist. I laid my chin to rest on her shoulder. She smiled and rested her cheek on mine. I didn't want to let go of her. I wanted to just stay with her, right here in this moment forever. But alas, Alice would not stop yelling in my head to get downstairs already so she could see Bella.

I sighed and kissed her shoulder. "Alice is going to explode if we don't get down there soon." I said taking her hand. I then lead her down to the living room. Half way down the stairs Bella bolted to where Alice was waiting. Alice squealed with joy and spun Bella around to get a better look at her.

"My visions didn't do you justice. You look gorgeous." Alice immediately started going over different fashions her body would look great in. Bella just smiled. She was just happy to have her best friend back.

I stood watching the two catch up from the stairs, leaning against the wall. Alice was squealing with delight and congratulating Bella with our recent engagement, already listing off things that needed to be planned. I smiled. I couldn't wait either, and Bella looked as if she were glowing. She started to describe some ideas she already had planned but Alice hushed her to wait until I was out of earshot, she wanted it to be a surprise for me, I gathered from her thoughts. "So I don't get a say in my own wedding?" I frowned.

"No!" Alice poked her tongue out. "This will be a bonding experience for me and Bella! Besides my visions will let me know if you'd approve." She grinned. I rolled my eyes. She started talking to Bella in hushed whispers. I watched Bella whisper something back at Alice with a grin on her lovely face.

Jasper came up to stand by me and watch them as well.

_I've got to say I'm surprised that Bella is taking all of this very well. I expected her to do better once you were here but she's acting like nothing ever happened. She looks completely like her old self. You would have never guessed that just yesterday she_—

I turned to glare at him. His mind quickly fell into apology.

_I should have watched her more carefully, I should have known. Sorry brother, I have failed you again. _

I shook my head slightly and motioned to go outside.

"We'll be back in a while." I announced.

Bella looked like she was about to object but Alice spoke first. "We'll be fine, go catch up. We'll find… _something_ to do while you're gone!"

"No Bella Barbie!" Bella snapped quickly.

Alice pouted. "But Bellaaaaaaaaaaa, I haven't gotten to dress you in forever!" Bell a turned to give me a panicked look. I chuckled.

"Remember Bella, you're stronger than her right now. She can't make you do anything you don't want to."

Bella grinned. Alice pouted then glared at me. "Party pooper." She mumbled.

Jasper and I ran out a few miles until we were out of earshot of the girls. Again he started to bombard me with apologies.

"Look Jasper, I'm not all too happy with you right now, but I'm not really angry at you."

He stared at me confused. "You felt pretty angry the other day."

"It was only at myself for not being here to begin with. We both have slipped our share of times, and she is a newborn it was to be expected. But I can't help but blame myself for it. I wanted to be the one here for her. I saw in Alice's vision that you tried your hardest to get Bella away from that man. I'm not going to blame you for what happened. From other things I had seen from Alice, you took care of her better than I expected. I just wish things would have gone differently."

"I could have done better though." _I shouldn't have been so distracted that day_. _I still can't believe I let it happen. _"I'm really glad you're back though. What you did for Bella…you helped her in ways I couldn't. I'm just glad that Bella's back to her old self again. I felt so helpless before. I was worried that she was too horrified at what she had done...I didn't think she would bounce back from it this soon." _It was all because of you, Edward._ "You were able to reel her back in. I could have never done what you did for her. Just you being there for her got her through this. I don't know what I would have done if she wouldn't have snapped out of it."

"I don't know what I would have done either. I'm just grateful it didn't have to come to that." I placed my hand on his shoulder. "Thank you for taking care of her for me. I owe you."

Jasper looked away slightly. _You don't owe me anything… _ His mind flashed to Bella on her birthday, and then changed to a memory of the scene at the ballet studio. He was standing on the edge of the broken window overlooking the fire we were throwing James' body in. And then that shifted into a crowed park… but quickly the image changed to Alice in his arms. "Everything alright, Jasper?"

"Yes, I just want to get back to Alice. I don't want to spend any more time apart from her." He looked back to me and smirked. "And by the way congratulations on the engagement little brother."

I grinned. "Thanks."

"Although you should have manned up and asked her before she had to ask you!" He laughed as he clapped his hand on my back. We started walking at human pace back towards the house.

"Well I would have, but I didn't know if she would have said yes. Although I should have known better, I did hear her mother thinking about Bella telling her that I would be the type of guy she could marry." I smiled. "I'm so lucky to have found her."

"I'm really happy for you, Edward. She's perfect for you." Jasper started thinking about when he was getting closer to the house earlier and he felt all the lust Bella and I were emitting. "You know I've become quite close to Bella these last few months, and I've grown quite protective of her. When we got here I was completely taken back by all that lust, more than usual. From what I gather, you two have…" He looked quite uncomfortable suddenly. "I didn't expect it. Not from you, anyways. I was at first a bit angry at you. You're always the perfect gentlemen, and that kind of threw me for a loop. I figured you would have married her first, with your values and all."

I paused to think for a moment. It was true. My mother had religiously reminded me of the proper and sinless way to court a woman. It all went through the window shortly after I met Bella. I couldn't keep myself away from her. I had to hold her and kiss her. And now that she was unbreakable and wanted to love her in every way. "We live in another time now. It's not the same as it was when we were younger Jasper."

"Yes, I know. But you're still fairly old fashion. I was just surprised is all. At least you're engaged. I would have had to kick your ass for taking advantage of her if you had not intended to marry her." He glared at me, but from his thoughts he was smiling inside, he was truly happy that we had found each other and were so much in love. We were quite for a moment, and then he suddenly laughed. "At least Emmett won't be able to call you the hundred year old virgin anymore."

I laughed. "Yeah, after fifty years of hearing that, it was getting pretty old."

"Although…there are thousands of innuendos and sex jokes he will undoubtedly use on you now. You know, for years he's been writing them down behind your back, waiting for the day he could finally use them on you. He's going to have a field day when he finds out."

I groaned. "Hopefully he doesn't find out for as long as possible." Suddenly my cell phone rang. I quickly picked it up hoping it was Bella. "Hello?"

"Eddie, Ma'Boy! FINALLY!"

Jasper began to laugh as he felt my dread.

"Er…Emmett I'm busy I'll call you later."

"What?! No man this is too important. My little brother has become a man! I've been waiting for years to congratulate you. Now, you have to make sure you keep her satisfied. I'll teach you everything you need to know. You should try— "

"God no. NO! Goodbye Emmett!" I quickly ended the call and groaned loudly. My phone buzzed again, a text from Alice.

_That was for ruining my Bella Barbie time. xP_

"Of course it was Alice." I sighed. "Your wife is pure Evil!"

Jasper continued to laugh at my expense. "Aw come on, Edward. Like you could have really hid it from Emmett anyways? He would have probably figured it out the first moment he saw you again."

"He's not _that_ perceptive."

Jasper rolled his eyes. "When it comes to the nature of anything sex related, yes he _is_ that perceptive. You have met Emmett right? He's a master at finding and revealing secrets. He lives for the thrill of making fun of you." He was remembering the time Emmett had started spreading rumors about me at the school we had been to before Forks High. Emmett had told the biggest gossip at the school that I was gay and that I was constantly hitting on him when we were at home alone. So by the end of the day, the whole school had heard, and their thoughts were highly unpleasant. He had also commissioned a few people at the school to help him find a boyfriend for me so I would leave him alone. The rest of that year was a disaster. Not only did I have the crazed girls constantly trying to get me to date them, I soon had a bunch of boys asking me out as well! And when I had finally almost convinced them I was not interested in men, Emmett posted photographs around the school of me holding up a calendar with a naked man on it with only a fireman's hat on. Which I only had in my hands because Emmett had taped it to this inside of my locker and had taken the picture before I realized what he was doing.

"Great, Emmett is going to drive me insane." I then glared at Jasper. "And you better not join his antics."

He grinned. "I can't make any promises." He then took off running towards the house.

"You're fairly hard to track down you know." I smirked. The girl had given me the slip five times already and she was starting to piss me off. This time I had only caught up to her because I interrupted her while she feeding. She dropped the body to the ground and quickly looked for a way to escape. I instantly snapped up and grabbed a chunk of her hair in my hand and pushed her to the ground. Now that I had her within arm's reach, she could not escape my grasp. I was much older, much stronger.

"Who the hell are you? You've been following me for months." She hissed and I slapped her face. _No one hisses at me._

"I am the one who will help you seek revenge." The girl's eyes furrowed in confusion and then widened in realization. I let her go of her dirty red hair and attempted to wipe my hand clean of it. "Come, we have much to discuss."

* * *

**Tell me what you think! And please review! They make me uber-happy when you do and they make me want to write even more.**

**Thank you guys again for sticking with me, next chapter we start diving a little more into the plot. =)**

**~Jan**


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